The lights dimmed, the music was whispered, and the marshmallows in their mouths melted......

Listening to a quiet and sad song, walking alone on the road from work embraced by darkness, it is so meaningful. I like this kind of quietness www.biquge.info in that ignorant youth......

At that time, I hadn't written for more than ten days, and I felt so rusty, as if some of the things I used to do before would change if I stopped doing them for a while.

Well, the reason is complicated, just like people's moods are as unpredictable as the weather, and there is no suitable reason to find them.

In the past ten days, I have had a variety of special feelings, all of which I really wanted to write, but I didn't write them. It's like the season when it was supposed to rain but it didn't rain, revealing an abnormality.

So when I suddenly want to write, what should I write? There are all kinds of "bubbles" floating in my mind, and I can't stand the salvage ......

So, getting a little is a little bit.

When I write, I always feel that there is a spell that haunts me, a spell that I think but can't do.

A lot of times, I've written logs that I really want someone to see and I want someone to see them, but somebody doesn't read them. On the contrary, I wrote some journals that I didn't want anyone to see at all and really didn't want anyone to see them, but someone read them all.

Those moments when I thought things but couldn't do them, I always felt that it was providence.

If I want someone to see it or don't want someone to see it, why don't I do something small? To see is to see, not to see is not to see. Fate is fate, and fate is fate.

When I first started writing about Dongdong before, because I read the sentence "Someone will always read every mood, every journal, every ......photo you have written from the past to the present, so I always have an expectation in my heart, and I feel that the other half who will appear in the future will definitely read every bit I wrote.

It wasn't until the flowers of anticipation in my heart withered that I realized that it was just a beautiful fantasy. There is no one who can read every mood and every journal I write with my heart, because I can't do it myself......

The large number is one reason, and the difficulty of finding a confidant is also a reason.

What is a confidant? Is a person who knows a lot of your secrets a confidant? My own opinion is this: After getting along with you for a while, you have shared a lot of secrets with that person, and that person also understands the back of your joys, sorrows, and sorrows, but that cannot be regarded as a confidant, but can only be said to be a good friend and best friend. And after being with you for a while, you haven't told that person the secret, but that person seems to understand what is behind your joys, sorrows, and sorrows, and can "prescribe the right medicine", then that person is not at the level of heart-to-heart, but a confidant of the soul.

In those ten days, I didn't write, I thought no one would pay attention, maybe it was better not to write, but someone noticed that I hadn't written for a long time. It was a special touch, something I hadn't expected.

The first is my good friend God, who touched me because he was always in my world. He not only noticed that I didn't write Dongdong, but also suggested that I open a WeChat public account to write Dongdong. Quack, that's actually pretty good, it's just that I prefer to write in the buckle space, because if I write in the buckle space, I can see how much I've written, and it's easy to flip back and read. But if I write it in the WeChat public account, it is more difficult for me to look through what I wrote before, and I have to keep drawing it...... But I'm glad he gave me that advice, at least, I have one more option.

The second one is a friend I described as a "19-year-old girl". What touched me about her was that she was neither a relative of mine, nor a good friend I had ever met, but an online friend who had never met but had only chatted in the virtual world. However, she noticed that I hadn't written for a long time, and she was unexpectedly moved. Oh, the reason why I note her as a "19-year-old girl" is because she was only 19 years old when I became friends with her, so I made a note like this. Now they've grown up......

Sometimes writing and writing, the single cycle will unknowingly accompany me for one night......

The lights went out and the music was still......

Time goes on.

Many times, you want to wait a while to do something, but wait and find that something you said you were going to do has been put on the back of time. And, when you remember something you said you wanted to do but didn't do it, you don't want to do it anymore......

So, why do you have to wait to do something in the first place? Maybe you are too busy to forget, maybe you are afraid to face it and deliberately avoid it.

For me, I think, I belong to the latter group. Fearful of confronting it, he deliberately avoided ......

Take my hobby, I like to write my own songs, but I'm afraid to write songs. Because I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to write it halfway through, which is undoubtedly a terrible thing for me with obsessive-compulsive disorder, I have five songs that I haven't finished halfway through, and I haven't finished writing songs that have been shelved for three years. And I never finished writing those songs......

Feelings, is a factor. I don't feel like I'm going to write songs anymore because I'm not motivated, and I'm afraid I'll be messy when I write.

But from time to time in my mind, the inspiration for a new melody wafts through my work, and it stands to reason that I should have written it down, but I didn't. Letting inspiration flow without leaving it behind is another abnormal performance.

Actually, if I was brave enough to start, I could finish a song in no time. It's just that cowards in the soul are always used to being cowardly......

The same goes for drawing and writing, if you don't draw and write for too long, you will become more and more afraid to start continuing the relay. Why are you afraid? It's just an adverse reaction caused by an unsteady heart and a lack of confidence in yourself.

But when I insist on going and starting to draw or write on my own, after I finish drawing or writing, my feelings will come back. It seems that what is standing in my way is just a paper tiger. But even a paper tiger makes me feel as afraid as I see a real tiger.

There are many difficult things, but the difficulty is whether you have the courage to start and really start.

Sometimes when I see a painting that is so difficult to draw, I try to avoid it and don't want to draw it. So, in order to be able to force myself to face it, then I have to start. As long as I draw a stroke on a blank piece of paper, then I will finish the painting even if I am afraid to draw it. The reason is simple, I have obsessive-compulsive disorder. Drawing a stroke on paper and then erasing it and not drawing it is simply unacceptable for me, who has obsessive-compulsive disorder. Therefore, face it obediently and regain your feelings.

It's the same with writing Dongdong, I haven't written it for too long, and I don't know what to write at all. But when I insist on writing a beginning, then I will finish writing that article. OCD is both a problem and a "weapon" that I can use.

It is more important to know yourself than to know others. I don't know it, how can I live for myself?

In that case, why don't I use my OCD to make myself write songs......?

At that time, I was more interested in drawing and writing.

When you're brave enough to start, but start a little muddled, that's okay. Because in the process since you started, you have made small progress, and you are no longer where you are. What you need to do after that is to get your mindset right and take the right steps to get yourself back on track.

So am I back on track?

I don't know, I felt like I was still "cheating" at the time, quack......

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