It was only after I actually entered the city that I realized that everything was so out of place for me.

I only knew that Nike is not a name but a famous brand, I only knew that cappuccino is the name of coffee, I learned that my classmates liked to listen to MP4, and I knew that I was so local. The city I fantasized about was so far from the one day that I actually arrived in, and I squeezed in as if I was desperately trying to break my head, but I was not welcomed by the world. As far as the eye can see, there are cold stares and mocking words everywhere.

I was just a poor peasant girl, I didn't have the money to buy expensive clothes, I was wearing pants that my mother had paid 50 yuan to sew at the market, and my mother said, "These two pants are enough for you to wear them in school for three years." ”

After enrolling in the city, everything was not as good as I had imagined, and I began to have low self-esteem and began to indulge in novels. I'm no longer the darling of my teachers, I'm no longer popular with my classmates, and I'm not even part of this world.

When I was in my third year of high school, my father was ill and could no longer bear the heavy work, and my mother took on the burden of life alone. I am the only daughter in my family, and my parents were very old when they gave birth to me. Later, in the college entrance examination, because of my father's illness, my grades were unstable, and my original score was always in the second line, which was directly affected, and finally I was only admitted to three universities in this city.

I became the biggest expectation for my family to jump out of the farm, and I became the first college student in our small mountain village to go to the city. On the day I left my hometown, Uncle Uncle, the village chief, sent me out of the mountain village with the tuition money that the whole village had raised for me. As soon as I turned around, I saw the expectant eyes of countless villagers and the tears of my mother.

I'm about to start school, and after my mother boiled me boiled eggs early in the morning, I didn't forget to go to the back mountain to chop a lot of firewood and go home, this simple woman dedicated her life to this inch of land. She has wisdom, she can calculate arithmetic faster than me after ten days of school, she has hard work, she is one of the best workers in the village, she has tenacity, her father fell and she didn't say a word, and then the hoe began to work alone. However, she was buried in this mountain village, and for the rest of her life she could only watch the outside world from the small black and white TV set at home.

Only those who have experienced those heartaches and hardships can understand the power of expectation. My mother knew the importance of studying, and she had to pay for me to go to college, and the night before I left, she hid under the covers and cried all night. I understood how gratifying and joyful it was for her to walk out of this mountain village.

I carry the dreams of too many simple villagers. However, my heart was not happy at all, because only I understood that the so-called university I went to was just an inconspicuous one among many universities in the country, and the major of "Chinese Language and Literature" that I applied for was not popular at all, and I still had to go to the city to endure those blank eyes and those ridicules, and I could not see whether my future path was bright. The carp jumping out of the farmer's gate may be just a sweet dream for me.

In this way, I stepped into the threshold of the university with heavy steps, and the three years of college were just a part-time job in disguise for me. If I want to finish my studies, I have to constantly go to work, work as a tutor, work as a waiter, distribute flyers, deliver takeaways, toss myself enough, don't go home during winter and summer vacations, just call my mother and tell me, I'm fine, I'm fine, I got a scholarship, I make a lot of money, I can take care of my own tuition, Mom, you don't have to worry about it......

Only I know how miserable I am, how unhappy I am, and how I have no sense of existence in this huge university. My busy life made me have no sense of existence in the dormitory, I closed myself off, blindly lived in my own world, didn't communicate much with anyone, didn't make any friends, and was framed by my roommate for stealing money......