One afternoon, the weather was fine

Sunny like a woman's short skirt looming under the XX.

Lao Xuan licked his face and smiled, and sat by the window with Lao Li, who was engaged in the technical exchange and seminar of the deception world.

I looked helplessly at them through the glass window and pointed at all kinds of beautiful women passing by on the street, and shook my head.

It's been the fourth day since I returned from my one-day trip to the underworld.

In the past four days, these two old immortals with the same lofty ambition have sympathized with each other and hit it off at first sight, and they have stepped on the time to sit together in our store at noon every day to eat and drink, blowing the sky and the earth.

Between the last "lighter incident" and the power of Lao Li's "fart", I could only watch dryly as they used all kinds of obscene eyes, actions and words to scare the beautiful customers that Teddy had finally pulled in one after another, and they couldn't do anything.

This is okay, anyway, with the urine nature of the foreign Taoist, even if the store loses money again, he is embarrassed to owe me and Leon wages, after all, Leon is still counting on this little money to make some new equipment and end the assassination of the third prince as soon as possible!

However, don't think that the foreign Taoist priest who plucked the goose would really be so generous.

On the first day of Lao Zhao, Lao Li and Lao Li used wine as a song, chatted excitedly, and shouted: "I'll invite this meal!", the foreign Taoist priest had already floated to my side leisurely and threw me a small notebook.

Me: "Why are you giving me a notebook? I don't like to keep a diary. ”

Foreign Taoist: "Who asked you to write a diary, didn't you see that your family urged the boss to boast about Haikou again!"

Me: "So what?"

The foreign Taoist priest pouted: "Look at the torn T-shirt and big pants he is wearing, where are the pockets on his body?"

Me: "And then?"

The foreign Taoist priest looked at me with an idiotic look: "I don't have a pocket, where does he get the money for food?"

Me: "You mean to let me keep an account of the food he eats? You are too simple, can he be the master of debts?"

"I didn't expect him to return either, isn't there still a good apprentice like you!" The foreign Taoist priest smiled proudly: "In the future, everything that is always urged to eat will be recorded in this book, and it will be deducted from your salary every month!"

Me: "Nima!"

In this way, I began to sit behind the bar every afternoon, while cursing the old urging of the villain, while watching the two of them eat and drink with distress.

After a while, the door opened, and a young man walked in and said, "Brother Meng!"

I looked up, "Are you?"

"You forgot, Zhang Jianfeng, who reported a regiment with you in the underworld!"

Me: "Zhang Jianfeng?"

Seeing that I still didn't think about it, Zhang Jianfeng smiled and said, "That day, you still sprayed me with a face of pork bone soup, and Sansheng Shiqian also laughed at my marriage because of the three fresh, do you remember?"

I frowned, remembered for a while, suddenly remembered, and shouted: "It turned out to be you! Why, are you really going to run away from home, leave the master, and elope with that Di Sanxian?"

Zhang Jianfeng: "Don't say it, let her hear you call her that, I have to be beaten again!"

I smiled: "Is it originally the third fresh." ”

Zhang Jianfeng: "Those three immortals are immortals, okay! They are the descendants of the Hu family immortals in the northeast, and they have nothing to do with the three immortals of the earth!"

Me: "I don't know, I only know that the three freshness in the Northeast is delicious!"

Leon passed by with a plate of dog food, and interjected: "Big elbows are also delicious! The last time I went to the Northeast to take orders, I ate for three days in a row!" After speaking, he chirped and had an endless aftertaste.

Me: "Don't think about it, you will never have the opportunity to go to the Northeast to take orders in your life." ”

Leon frowned, and then remembered the third prince who couldn't die at all, and suddenly wilted like a frosted eggplant, and sighed: "Alas, perhaps, I, the number one killer in history, will work in your bar for the rest of my life." After speaking, dragging the back of the vicissitudes of life, he ran to the door and squatted down, and sat down with Teddy.

Me: "Brother Feng, does that Di Sanxian in your family know that you have seen the marriage stone?"

Zhang Jianfeng smiled bitterly: "Not yet, I didn't even dare to tell my master about this matter." ”

Me: "I said that your master is true, what age is it now, even gender can't be an excuse to block true love, what race do you care about!"

Zhang Jianfeng raised his head and looked at me with a resolute expression: "This is the rule passed down by our sect for many years! You know, we are Arhats......

I shook my hand, looked at Lao Li, who was eating a fruit bowl with his feet buckled at the door, and interrupted him: "Don't tell me anything about Arhat, disgusting panic." ”

Zhang Jianfeng: "Anyway, it is impossible for me and Chen Ziying to be together......!

Me: "Arhat Gate? Now the cultivators, who are not big fish and meat, with a group of wives and concubines, are still there to guard those broken rules, and if you continue like this, you will really become an Arhat Gate, and only a bunch of old virgins will be left to stack Arhats!"

Zhang Jianfeng smiled awkwardly: "Forget it, don't talk about it, I'm here to pay you back today!" With that, he took out a wad of bills from his pocket and handed it to me.

Me: "Pay back? What money? You remember wrong! I didn't lend you money!" I looked at the old man who was rushing towards my position with gold stars in his eyes, and winked at Zhang Jianfeng again and again.

Zhang Jianfeng was puzzled: "Impossible! That day in the underworld, you ...... Sansheng Stone."

I hurriedly covered his mouth, shook my head at the sneering old man on the side and said, "Don't listen to his nonsense, he's drunk!"

Zhang Jianfeng obviously didn't react, and forcefully pulled away my hand and said, "Don't talk nonsense, our Rashomon disciples don't drink!"

"I have been squatting here for four days, and I have finally been caught by me today, right?" Lao Xuan smiled and put the 20,000 yuan on the table into his pocket, and said to me: "I think you are a first-time offender, the stolen money will be confiscated, and you will not be held accountable, if there is a next time, I will let you go to the eighteenth layer of hell to accompany the beacon fire and have a good chat for a few days! Lao Li, let's go, the task is complete, please go to the big health care!"

I had long expected that this old immortal had no good intentions! Since the trip to Heaven and Earth, he has been following me with a thief's eyebrows, coming to the bar to report at a fixed time every day, and he was waiting for 20,000 yuan!

Zhang Jianfeng watched Lao Xuan take the money, ran away without a trace, and said to me at a loss: "Who is that?"

I didn't feel good and said, "My second uncle!"

Zhang Jianfeng: "Why did your second uncle take away your money?"

Me: "See a doctor, his kidneys, impotence, impotence, and premature ejaculation, flowers, willows, plums, HIV/AIDS, liver cancer, lung cancer, and cerebral plasma cancer, anyway, all kinds of incurable diseases are entangled, and they are all in an advanced stage!"

Zhang Jianfeng sighed: "Your second uncle is really cheerful enough, he can still laugh when he is seriously ill, he is really a free and easy person!"

Me: "I don't know if it's sprinkled or not, but I'm sure I'll take it off after a while!"

......

And just like that, my two dollars disappeared again.

I sat at the back of the bar, smoking cigarette after cigarette, and my heart ached.

Sometimes, I really think that the eight yin bodies mentioned by Lao Xuan are true, otherwise why would every time something good happen is coming, he will suddenly reverse and go straight down, so that the gold, platinum and platinum in his hand will slip through his fingers.

The thirteenth princess came over from the back kitchen and comforted me: "Forget it, money is like dung, don't care so much." ”

Me: "You're so light-hearted, you yourself grew up in a dung pit, and of course you don't understand us poor people who use dung as fertilizer for life!"

At this moment, the door of the bar was kicked open, and I looked up to see a man in a black jacket posing and standing in front of our bar door with a grim face.

The man is about 1.85 meters tall, with a deep scar on the right side of his face, straight down from the inner corner of his eye, pointing straight to his chin, and a stick-like object more than two meters long wrapped in a coarse cloth behind his back, his eyes are cold and crazy, as if everyone sitting there owes him money.

The man tilted his head, looked around, and then met my eyes.

Ten seconds later, he said, "What are you seeing?

I laughed: "I'm looking to see if you kicked our door, you know, that door is made of high-quality pear blossom wood, I'm afraid you can't afford it." ”

Just kidding, the most expensive property in our entire bar is the two doors sent by Qian Lanlan's form, usually we push the door carefully, for fear of falling off the paint and breaking the skin, you are good, kick me on the side with a kick!

I looked at the footprints on the door and my heart ached. But seeing this buddy's fierce and evil look, he was embarrassed to attack. (I'm really embarrassed, it's not that I don't dare!After all, I'm a descendant of the Heavenly Master!)

The man snorted coldly and said to me, "You are Zhang Meng, right?"

Oops, the people who came to me by name, it seems that it is really not good.

Me: "I just, I don't know this little brother you?"

Man: "You deflated calf! Dare to rob Lao Tzu's woman! See if Lao Tzu doesn't kill you today?"

Me: "Big brother, you misunderstood! I have nothing to do with Qian Lanlan!"

The man frowned: "Who is Qian Lanlan?"

Me: "You're not Qian Lanlan's suitor?"

Man: "I don't know any Qian Lanlan!"

It's strange, among the girls I know, except for Qian Lanlan, only Yuanyuan and the thirteenth princess are left.

Although the thirteenth princess didn't say it explicitly, everyone already knew that they had already assigned him to the stupid third prince.

And Yuanyuan, with her face, the foreign Taoist priest can definitely rest assured, and there is no rival in love in this life.

So in the end, only Qian Lanlan is left as a female character who is both single and has many suitors.

But this man said that he didn't know Qian Lanlan, so which girl could I rob with him?

The man glared at me and said angrily: "You turtle grandson, you still have no shame, not to mention the woman who robbed me, she is still breaking her shoes outside!"

Me: "Big brother, I broke my shoes, but you can tell me clearly, who is your woman?"

Man: "Who else could it be! Who else is the gentleest, kindest, loveliest, and most beautiful woman in the world!"

Me: "You're talking about Mr. Cang, right?"

Man: "Fart! Lao Tzu is talking about Xiao Wai!"