Today, I proposed to break up with my boyfriend of five years, and yes, it was I who offered to break up.

During this time, he seemed to be very sad, sighing inadvertently, always wanting to stop talking. I was sensitive and knew something had to happen. So I took the initiative to talk to him. I was holding a hot cup of coffee, and through the heat, his voice seemed far away. The story is very simple, the girl he once asked for but couldn't ask for came into his life again, on the one hand, I am the current one, and on the other hand, the first love that I couldn't ask for before, his heart is swaying and painful.

At that time, I suddenly thought of a sentence: "The mind is born at will, the heart moves at will, but the mind moves without moving, it is difficult and difficult." ”

I once saw a picture of that girl in one of his hidden albums, and she smiled innocently, as pure as a budding gardenia, and people couldn't hate it.

When a person's heart is moved, the result is already self-evident.

The coffee in my hand was slowly cooling, I was silent for a moment, and then spoke first: "Ji Heng, I told you before, if you fall in love with someone else one day, please tell me, and I will give you freedom." Now, can you tell me the answer?"

My voice seemed to be drowned out by the heat of the rising coffee, so light that I couldn't even hear it. He looked up at me, as if he didn't know what to say.

I already know the answer. So, I took the initiative to break up.

Hearing this, his expression was very complicated for a while, including guilt, reluctance, surprise, chagrin, and unconcealable relaxation.

He seemed to breathe a sigh of relief and said in a low voice: "Xia Qing, you are always so strong, so strong that people think you are invulnerable." ”

My fingertips were cold, and the cup of cold coffee was held firmly between my hands, and the surface of the black-brown liquid did not move at all, not even a ripple. I don't know how long I stared at that cup of coffee, or when he left, and by the time I looked up, the sunset was almost gone, leaving only a faint orange. The gray sky seems to be divided into layers, and a large area of dark gray is connected to that layer of light gray, like an unevenly colored oil painting, and a layer of light orange is brushed underneath, which is obviously a warm color, but it is like a beginner who is not skilled in color mixing on the canvas with different shades, stiff and mottled.

Later, when I recalled the events of that day, I couldn't remember many pictures and words, but I only remembered the vague sunset.

My story with him is ordinary. Soon after entering college, I participated in a club activity and met him, and then he began to pursue, delivering breakfast every day, sending medicine when sick, caring and considerate, and taking care of everything. In our junior year, we were together. He was a gentle man, and his days with him were gentle and comfortable. I even thought about working hard together after graduation, starting a small family, having a boy and a girl, and I wanted my children to grow up in a warm family.

Now, however, these imaginations have been shattered. Because I seem strong, I can take more suffering. I didn't understand this logic before, but later, I realized that not everything in life has logic.

Once the lacrimal ducts are opened, they don't seem to stop. I covered my face tightly, the fragile self buried deep in my heart, and I couldn't stop crying. Just cry happily, which can be regarded as an end to this relationship. Everyone in the bar was immersed in the New Year's Eve fun, and no one would have noticed me crying in the corner of the bar anyway.

After wiping the paper towels in my bag, I raised my hand to ask the bar attendant to hand me a pack of paper towels, and suddenly a clean white paper towel was handed to me, and I instinctively took it and wiped the undried tears and ...... Snot. I realized something after wiping it, and when I turned my head, a man sat next to me, his outline as sharp as a knife and axe, he had the light on his back, and he couldn't see his facial features clearly, and the light above hit the bridge of his high nose, and one side of his face was hidden in the shadows.

"Do you still need it?" he said suddenly, his voice deep and deep.