No. 009: The secret technique of secretly having fun

- Secretly Doing Stupid Things (continued)

"You two melon babies listen to me, this time I will give you a long memory, if you dare to go against Lao Tzu again, Lao Tzu has more ways to kill your two turtle sons!

When Fu Quanhe called for his lord, the Lan brothers still hoped to escape being wronged. Because Fu Quanhe messed up all the footprints this time, and didn't put anything on them to frame them.

As soon as the killer feature came out, the two of them were completely convinced.

"If you haven't reformed yourself, you have committed it again and again, and you don't admit it every time, so such a person should be sent to a labor camp. Vice-captain, I have a way to make them unable to deny it. ”

"What's a good way, you can tell me quickly, you have caught the thief many times, and twice you have caught two with one person, good job, we will reward you. ”

"Don't let them swallow it, let them spit it on the ground, and you can prove it at a glance!"

"Ahh ”

The results don't need to be detailed, they just won't respond every day. The boss of the Lan family left a bad reputation for people, and sure enough, it didn't take long for him to find out because of another minor mistake, and he was found out of the history of stealing peanuts twice, and he was sent to labor reform.

More than 20 years later, the boss of the Lan family became the deputy director of the county farm.

At that time, the eldest son of the Lan family had already become Fu Quanhe's in-laws, and his adopted son married Fu Quanhe's youngest daughter. The two families often quarrel, if they don't quarrel and are incomprehensible, how can we know that Fu Quanhe has done so many 'good things'?

At the most quarrelsome time, Fu Quanhe picked up a killing knife and cut a piece of flesh from his thigh with his own hands, and the blood flowed, scaring away many people. Of course, this knife was for show, and few people could see through his tricks at that time.

As he got older, he became more and more composed. Later, he stole peanuts and went at night, and when the people guarding the mountain were asleep, he climbed into the peanut field alone, and did not pull the seedlings and peanuts together and pick them again. He started to plane along the needle of peanuts, and only picked off about half of each nest, that is, like catching a strong man, 'three dings draw one, five dings draw two'. After finishing the soil, the soil is filled back, and the peanuts can still grow, which can be said to be unaware, which is Fu Quanhe's stealing technique to "dig into the roots".

This is true for peanuts, as are sweet potatoes, sweet potatoes, potatoes, taro, etc.

As a teenager, he certainly didn't stop stealing these. He has different tricks for stealing different things, often unexpectedly, and he can be successful, and if others use his methods, there are many chances of success. Let's give a few examples, not to teach people to learn badly, but to pay attention to the guards and be able to be vigilant, these tricks are worthless to put it bluntly, and the sinking boat is to make it worthless.

Fruit falling from a tree is an example. According to the usual practice, the fruit that falls naturally from the fruit tree, whoever picks it will be everyone's, and people will only have a red eye, and no one will blame it. The problem is that under the fruit tree that Fu Quanhe walked through, he could often encounter fruit falling from the tree, and no one else would have as good luck as him. Just because he has a roll of fishing line on his body, and a big screw is tied to one end, and when people are not paying attention, there is a high probability that he can twist one, and after secretly pulling it, he only needs to take a step or two, bend down to pick it up. Because the line is thin and opaque, it can be hidden in the palm of your hand, and it is difficult to see after a few steps. This is Fu Quanhe's stealing technique "leaving no trace".

The same is to steal fruits, when the wind is blowing loudly, throw fruit trees with clods of soil or stones in the distance, hit some fruits, and then go generously to pick them, "the peaches that fall to the ground are not stealing", this is Fu Quanhe's stealing technique "see the wind and make the rudder". So he can choose more than others.

Qin Sanniang's family has a red pomelo tree that is unique to the whole team, and has piled up a jumba tree that is twice as wide as the crown under the tree, and has not been removed for many years. Ordinary people can't approach it, and they can't steal grapefruit, so Qin Sanniang never guards it.

Fu Quanhe specially hid a long wooden hook in the pile of juba, whenever he was greedy, he would hook one or two, just like his own fruit tree, the grapefruit hooked from the tree will inevitably be nailed to the juba, but it doesn't matter, the grapefruit skin is thick, it will not hurt the flesh in the flesh, and then the hook is taken to the hand, it is a good fruit to eat.

After the grapefruit is ripe, it can also be hung on the tree for two or three months, until the middle of winter Qin Sanniang will invite someone to go down the tree, Fu Quanhe has never been polite to her family, often visited, has been several years, the long wooden hook has not been found.

The fruits on the tree are slowly decreasing, and Qin Sanniang's family is not without suspicion, but she has observed the footprints left by those who steal grapefruit several times, which are short and wide, and the whole team only has her own baby son who is a little stupid, and the ugliness of the family cannot be publicized, she has been worried about Zhang Luo for her son for many years, and this 'family thief' must not be publicized. How could she have thought that those footprints were also made by Fu Quanhe with a stunt of two steps in one?

It is precisely when framing the boss of the Lan family that his footprints are narrowed, and here they are shortened, and the methods are the same. Fu Quanhe himself said that this was his stealing technique "old materials", but in fact, it contained a lot of other things.

In addition to studying, juvenile children spent half of their time pulling pigweed, picking up relics, and collecting dung, and most of the time was spent collecting firewood.

Most of the children picked up the thatch and dead leaves, but Fu Quan's family has a lot of firewood, and his family's stove burns more vigorously than the fire in the collective pig farm.

Just as picking up the fruit that falls to the ground is not stealing, it is not forbidden to inspect dry branches and firewood. Fu Quanhe took advantage of this loophole, and others artificially turned the fresh branches into dry firewood and then picked them home. He often climbed to the high branches of the trees, and peeled individual branches either by a small knot, or by boiling water, and after a few days, they became dry wood. Fu Quanhe himself said that this was his stealing technique "Chai Gao Chop Pot", because his boiling water was carried to the tree in a military turtle pot.

This guy picks up some dry firewood every day, and he has to do the evil thing of peeling the skin and drenching water every day, so he can have dry firewood to pick every day.

He lacked virtue in his youth, so he didn't talk about it.

As the saying goes, no one who steals a baby makes a fortune by sneaking, Fu Quanhe is not a habitual thief, stealing and stealing, it is just a mix of food and clothing, and he can't make a fortune.

By adulthood, he may have enjoyed himself and turned stealing into fun. When he was a child, it can be said that he loved to be naughty, and he didn't change it when he grew up, which was a prank.

As I said before, after the founding of the People's Republic of China, the fruit trees planted by my grandfather, the big landlord, were destroyed to the point that none of them remained, but fortunately, there were nearly 2,000 pear trees that survived, which was enough to form a large orchard and was famous far and wide.

Every time the pears are about to ripen, Uncle Ma from Majiagou comes to our team to contract the pears, and stays there all day and all night, eating and lodging, so he will not make a mistake like Xu Guansheng. He was a solitary guard, selling as he watched.

Since my grandfather planted nearly 20 varieties of pear trees, the ripening period was very long, from the rice blossoming in June to the frost in the spring in November, almost half a year, our team was full of pear fragrance. Because the whole package was given to Uncle Ma, Uncle Ma is a well-known old stubborn man who no one recognizes when he pulls his face, and whoever wants to eat a pear has to pay for it. The temptation for such a long time has spoiled the old and young of our team, especially Fu Quanhe, how can he endure it?

Uncle Ma doesn't understand the depth of our team very well, our team not only has Uncle Jin, a cattle herder who knows evil methods, but also Fu Quanhe, who steals a way to have fun!

In the cool autumn season, it is the time when the varieties such as golden pears, sugar pears, and winter and autumn stick pears, which are the most abundant in the pear orchard and have the most attractive color and fragrance, are ripe at the same time. Those dazzling cute guys with round bulges and shiny gold fragrances, everyone wants to hold and nibble on a few bites.

Listening to Fu Quanhe said that stealing words is two people together, doing two votes a month, one small fight, and one big ticket.

Fu Quanhe has grown into a young man, and he came out and asked a few friends to hit Uncle Ma and those pears together.

On a moonlit night, a group of them scattered around the bed in Uncle Ma's shed, forming two groups, and two particularly sweet 'grease mouths' coaxed Uncle Ma to the weir ridge, and the fine leaves and smoke were saluted, and the intimate dragon gate array was endless.

On the other side, Fu Quanhe's companions didn't even save the tree, so they carried away all the loads of pears that had been placed in front of the cool bed. When Uncle Ma came back and found out, he couldn't be sure that it was the accomplices of the two who stole it, so he could only scold all night and day to get angry.

For several days in a row, they all used the excuse of helping Uncle Ma analyze the case, comfort him, prevent him from being angry and looking for short-sightedness, etc., and "kindly" exhausted Uncle Ma.

That night, they divided into two people to hang out with Uncle Ma, and only pretended to disperse in the second half of the night. Not long after falling asleep, Uncle Ma slept like a dead pig.

Fu Quanhe and the four of them came out, lifted the big bed where Uncle Ma slept in the shed, turned around for half a circle, and then put it down, and aimed the only exit from the bed at Datian.

Uncle Ma's shed was set up on the wide ridge of the Wujia field, at that time the rice had been harvested for more than a month, and the Wujia field was stored for the winter, and the water was more than one meter deep, and the edge of this field was also two feet deep. That's not all, Fu Quanhe also dragged two cages that had already dried out, and the ringworms (that is, thorns) that Uncle Ma used to stop the pear tree were placed on the edge of the field.

As soon as Qiē was ready, the Fu Quanyi group climbed the pear tree that had been selected a long time ago, and picked the largest one. They can't do farm work, but they are good at doing this kind of sneaky work, and none of them are stupid, and it takes two hours for them to return with a full load. (To be continued)