Bulging?

In modern times, I often lost my voice occasionally due to the change of seasons in spring and autumn, and it only took a week to heal naturally, but I never heard a doctor say these two words, and I actually suffered from it in this Qing Dynasty?

What did Imperial Physician Su say at the time?

The external feeling of wind and cold and the evil of dryness and heat, coupled with the depression in the heart, lead to liver depression and stagnation.

Yin Zhen's face was very bad at that time, staring at Imperial Doctor Su who was full of water, and that look made me very worried. Imperial Physician Su just glanced at him indifferently, and when he turned to me again, his face became stern and serious, and his voice was clear and powerful, and I still remember his words.

"Fujin, your illness is not a stubborn disease, Su prescribes two prescriptions, and the medicine is sent over every day, you need to drink it on time. It's just that Su Mou dared to persuade him, if he wants to open up everything, if he is not happy, he will say or do it to vent. Prescribe medicine for doctors, can only treat some symptoms of the symptoms, the so-called symptomatic treatment also needs to treat the root cause, your disease is in the heart, the world's elixir is only yourself. ”

Listening to what he said, it doesn't seem like an incurable disease, but this old Su Taiyi is also quite interesting, no wonder Xiao Su's temperament turned out to be genetic. It's just that his father is old, and he has been honed a lot by the world or the palace, and he has covered up his true nature.

If you think about it carefully, it's really like this, heart disease still needs heart medicine, but where can I get my heart medicine. Can I?

Yinzhen didn't go to any room again, always sat quietly on the edge of my bed, and when he looked at me, there was a lot of love in his eyes, but he didn't say a word. Only when I was about to leave the house, I would take a pen and paper and write a line: "Have a good rest, wait for me to come back, don't think nonsense", or "I'll be back soon, you can take a nap", or "The medicine is a little bitter, you can bear with it", and so on, even let me save a stack. I still tucked them under my pillow, but he didn't flip them anymore or take them out to make fun of me.

I don't know if he believed that my illness would be cured, but we were used to not talking like this, and even when he had to say something, he always wrote it down. I looked at those beautiful handwritings, my eyes were no longer sour and moist, but my heart seemed to be stuffed with something.

I always wanted to shout out to him the secret I had hidden in my stomach, but I could only endure it. I tried to write it down on paper, but I always wrote and tore it, tore it off and wrote it again, until I gave up. I thought, let's wait until the day when I can speak again, I must tell him in person, tell him that Honghui is still alive, he is fine, he misses his Ama very much.

After more than half a month of rain and rain, I leaned on the chaise longue in the yard and watched the white cat who had been in the spring lazily lying at my feet basking in the sun. Hongwan squatted on the ground and stroked its long hair, learning its screams at night, Hongwan sat at the small table next to him and wrote, so calm that he couldn't hear anything.

The house was indeed very quiet, except for the laughter of Hongwan, and the subtle sound of Hongwan's pen falling on the paper, there was nothing, even the cats and dogs were obedient, as if there were only a few of us in the entire Baylor Mansion.

I changed my posture and lay on my back, closed my eyes and felt dizzy, every time I drank the medicine sent by Dr. Su, I always felt sleepy, I don't know if it was the effect of the medicine, or let Xia nap to make trouble.

As soon as my body moved, I opened my eyes and saw the two sisters and brothers standing next to me, two small hands grasping a thin brocade quilt and gently pulling it up. I sat up and pulled them to my side, smiled and said thank you, although I still couldn't hear them, I saw them shaking their heads, and the two similar little faces were smiling, and Hongwan was also smiling.

It's a good day like this, with children around your knees, quiet and comfortable.

When Yinzhen walked into the courtyard gate, he saw the three of us laughing, and his brows, which were always frowning, also stretched a little, standing at the door and squinting at us.

Hongwan trotted over, took his hand and bounced back, the immature children's voice was always so good, "Amma, E-Niang is very well-behaved, I drank the medicine and was about to fall asleep." ”

Hongwan lowered her head and called "Amma", her little hand still in my palm, moving slightly. I hurriedly let go, but he turned his hand and grabbed me again, and the corners of his lips smiled genuinely, "E-niang, sleep, my son and Sister Ama are here, you will wake up in a while, and you can see us when you open your eyes." ”

Hongwan is also my son, a son who is becoming more and more like Honghui. God has already given me a lovely and considerate Honghui, and after he had no choice but to leave, he actually had to make up for me with another one, which was so real that I couldn't bear it.

I saw Yinzhen squatting beside me, holding the red hand flat on my lap, and the warmth seeped into the skin through the brocade silk. The thin lips curled slightly, and the voice was gentle and low, as warm as the sun shining on me, "Sleep, it's hard to get the sun, you like it." ”

My world is like this rare sunny day, instantly driving away the previous damp haze, and the sun shines directly into my heart. Such a man and such a child, as well as the well-behaved and sensible Honghui in Hangzhou, they all hope that I will get better. They will also be sad and sad, but because of my decision, they endure great pain together, and still comfort and take care of me.

I smiled and nodded and closed my eyes, four smiling faces imprinted in my heart. This summer is still very long, it's almost June, and Yinxiang, who is far away, should come back.

~~~

Hongwan, who is about to be five years old, began to study formally with his master, and appeared in the yard with Yinzhen's routine before dawn every morning. Hongwan's little fingers are slender and slender, watching her follow Mei Yu Ruyi to learn female red, and follow the interpretation to practice the piano, I know that such a young girl has to accept ancient female education.

Speaking of ancient and modern Datong, I was already a first-grade little bean when I was five years old, although my father is gone, I will cry, but with the love of my mother and brother, I still grow up healthy. They, as it should be, I can't always dwell on my own painful entanglements. Giving them a complete mother's love is what I should do.

I took out an attitude of learning, sat next to the guzheng with Hongfu, and listened to the explanations in detail. The fingertips touching the strings and the ding-dong sound made me feel amazing.

Within two days, Yinzhen hugged a handful of zither and put it in my room, he didn't say everything like an explanation, just quietly held my hand and stroked it with the strings. Sometimes tactful and lingering, sometimes heroic and passionate, every time a piano sound sounds, I feel like I heard him say a word, and my heart is inexplicably warm and moved.

The guzheng in front of me was under my fingers, and along with his fingers, different melodious tunes overflowed. I thought, under his tutelage, I couldn't have learned anything. For I used to look straight at his slender fingers, lightly on my palms, or tilt my head to look at his earnest face, until the room was already silent, until his lips were gently pressed against my forehead.

On the sixth day of the sixth month of June, the atmosphere in the house was unusual, and there was a quiet atmosphere everywhere, and everyone's faces were tense, and they didn't dare to speak or laugh.

I know that this day is Honghui's anniversary, but it is also the fifth birthday of the Hongwan siblings, which is not good, really bad.

I went into the kitchen with Mei Yu and made a table of food, plus a big longevity peach.

When Yinzhen walked into the dining room, Yinxiang, who had not been seen for a month, was followed behind him, and when he saw the smile on my face, both of them looked at me in surprise.

I motioned for them to sit down, took the hands of the siblings, and asked them to cut the plate-sized red peach with a knife. When he saw the five small longevity peaches that emerged from inside, Hongwan's little face overflowed with smiles, and Hongwan touched one of them and looked at the big longevity peach shell that was divided into two.

Yinxiang's laughter resounded in the hall, slightly low, his hand stroked the soft hair of the red pull, and said with a smile to her and Hongwan: "It's only been a few years, you two are five years old, and the thirteenth uncle was also five years old back then, and it was your mother who made such a table of dishes." ”

Hong looked at him with a small face, his eyes blinked, and he smiled coquettishly while holding Yinxiang's cuffs, "What about Uncle Thirteen's gift?"

Yinxiang laughed lowly, took out two small pieces of emerald jade from his sleeve pocket, and hung them down in his hand, which looked like water was about to drip out when the sun shone on them, and carved the names of the two children respectively. I watched him hand the jade pendant to the two sisters and brothers, and sighed to Hong Wan with a smile, "Why are you like your mother." ”

Red shook the green next to me, and I reached out to help her tie it around her neck, the right size, and against her pink clothes, it looked even more verdant. Yinzhen got up from the chair next to me, walked to Hongwan and bent down, tied his piece on his belt, gently stroked the top of his head and looked at Yinxiang, there was also a smile in his eyes, but the corners of his mouth were still pursed.

Hongwan gathered around the table and distributed the little shou peach to us, but looked at the daze in his hand, and was stunned for a while before putting it in the spare small bowl, and said softly, "This Bang'er is left for my brother to eat." ”

I swept until Yinzhen pinched Shou Tao's hand and stiffened, and was looking at me, I hurriedly held his hand and looked at Hongwan shaking his head and smiling, and stuffed Shou Tao in his hand into her hand, "Bang'er is the most well-behaved, this is for you, Eniang and Ama eat one." ”

"You!"

My arm was grabbed hard by Yinzhen, my eyes were full of disbelief, and Shou Tao was almost pinched by him until it was deformed. Sister and brother Hongwan stared at me with their mouths open, and Yinxiang also looked at me with wide eyes. Only the three Meiyu who were standing next to them were smiling with their mouths covered.

I stretched out my hand to take the poor little longevity peach, looked at him with a smile, raised my head slightly and said happily, "What am I? I was cured two days before my illness, and I can already speak." It's just that today is the child's birthday, so ...... To stay until now to amuse the two of them. ”

Yinzhen stood up abruptly beside me, pressed my head against his waist and abdomen, and rubbed my hair with his palms.

I buried my face in him, and I heard Hong's cheerful laughter, "Okay, E-Niang can speak, Bang'er likes to listen to E-niang the most, and I want E-niang to sing to Bang'er." ”

Hongwan's voice also had an obvious smile, but his voice was still steady, "Don't make trouble, E-Niang is good, you can't sing, and you have to rest." ”

I heard Yinxiang finally relax and laugh from the bottom of his heart, and persuaded the two children to sit down and eat.

None of us mentioned Honghui again, but we filled the little bowl to the brim. I know that in their hearts, Honghui is always the most important deposit, not on the lips, but engraved in the bottom of our hearts, we are all so.

Yinzhen took me to Honghui's room, and when he saw the table with the incense candles removed, his eyes became cold. I winked at Caiyi, waited for her to exit and closed the door, and then looked at her jaw-clenched father.

Pulled him into the inner room, before I could speak, he had bent over to sit on Honghui's small bed, his fingers gently caressing the pillow, and at night, I could hear the sizzling sound of rubbing.

I squatted on the edge of the bed and leaned my head on his lap, reached out to cover his palm on the pillow, and was full of emotion, which turned into a very soft voice, "Yinzhen, thank you." ”

The hand on the pillow froze, and I could feel it start to cool, rubbing my face against his lap lightly, and continued, "I honestly, really thank you. You've always been there for me, with me, whether I'm happy or sad, you're there. I've never blamed you, never. Honghui, no. ”

Yinzhen's hand was on the back of my head, his fingertips slid over the top of my head, stroking gently, and suddenly, the voice seemed to come from the sky, "You should blame me, I said let you believe me, I said that Honghui will be fine, but what I said was not done." I'm even in Honghui...... Didn't even be able to stay with him. ”

"Yinzhen. I looked up and saw the pain in his eyes, my heart was like a pinprick, and I pulled the palm on the pillow and put it on my heart, "It's not like this, it's not your fault, you are the best Amma, in my heart, in Honghui's heart, in Hongwan's heart, in Hongwan's sister and brother's heart, you are." It's me who is not good, I didn't take care of Honghui, it's me who makes you sad. You...... I don't ask for your forgiveness, I don't need your understanding, I just want to tell you one thing, I know it will be hard for you to believe, but you believe me. ”

I sat on his knees, trying to make myself look into his eyes, watching his expression change again and again. I don't know if he heard my words clearly, and I don't know if he understood what I was saying, I just tried to tell him about Honghui, just like he told him about him.

Yinzhen sat on the edge of the bed, motionless, and I sat on his lap. When I say all the words that I have pressed in my heart, I feel instantly relaxed, even if he will be angry and will never pay attention to me again, I also feel a rare peace of mind.

The candles burned out, the room was dark, and the silver-white moonlight poured into the room, illuminating him as if it were illusory. I looked up at him as if I was afraid that he would disappear at any moment, and my neck ached, but I didn't want to move and couldn't move anymore.

I didn't dare to ask him if he resented me or hated me, because I knew that he didn't like Honghui a little bit. He used to say so proudly that it was enough for us to have an eldest son, and I will never forget that look, but I let their father and son be far away, not to mention Wu Yue. Therefore, no matter how much he loses his temper with me, even if he divorces me, I can understand it and accept it all without complaint.

Until the moonlight outside the window turned orange and turned golden, shining warmly, as if Yinzhen had finally let out a long sigh, I heard a "good" overflowing from the depths of his throat.

Sitting all night, that's how he reacted?

I overestimated Honghui's place in his heart?

Or was he stupefied by my words?