107. Guilty

"I know...... But ...... "Shandan doesn't know what to say, doesn't she understand the power of it?"

"You can discuss it with your lover first, and if you insist on doing it, then come to me, okay?" the doctor said softly as he looked at Shandan with a look of resignation.

Shandan stood up, she steadied her feelings, wiped away her tears, and walked out. Seeing Gu Haiping sitting there, holding his face with his hands, he seemed to look painful and lonely. She walked over and stepped down from the chair next to him.

"Why did it come out? can't you do it?" Gu Haiping asked.

"What can I do, what can't I do? The doctor said that he wanted me to discuss it with you, saying that I was so old that I had a miscarriage in my first child and that it might make it difficult to get pregnant in the future, that is, I might not have any children of my own in the future. What do you think?" said Shandan in a cold, stiff tone.

Gu Haiping said: "Didn't you plan the date? How could you get pregnant? Isn't it a safe period?"

"What do you mean? Did I get myself pregnant? The safe period is only relative, don't you know? How do I know what's going on?!" Shandan finally erupted, and she even roared.

Several people around cast inquiring glances, Gu Haiping pulled Shandan and whispered

"Why do you want me to come back if you don't want to have a miscarriage?" I came back from class by mistake, and you said you wouldn't do it? Aren't you kidding me?

"It's not that I don't do it, it's the doctor who said it! I'm playing you? I don't have the time or mood to play you!" She finally saw the selfish and cold side of Gu Haiping, who was usually gentle and elegant.

She couldn't help but shudder in her heart, this is the man she loves with all her heart? He knew how the miscarriage would hurt her, but he still insisted, regardless of her safety, let alone the child.

All he cares about is his own future.

Thinking about the simplicity and casualness of marriage, his parents didn't even give her a penny, even if he wanted to be auspicious, he should have given a red envelope! When he got married, only his parents and brother gave him long-life money and money to open his face. Gu Haiping's family didn't say anything.

Shandan didn't know how Gu Haiping told his family about this. He said to Shandan: "Our savings in the past few years have been put in my father's place first, and the marriage is simple and there is no need for the elderly to worry about it, and they don't have much money, and they will get it back when we settle down and go to school." If you take care of it, I will definitely make it up to you in the future, and I will be good to you for the rest of my life. ”

Shandan was convinced of that! She believed in him, and she relied on him for everything. She understands that he is a filial son, she would rather be wronged than considerate of him, she looks forward to the days after marriage can be harmonious and beautiful, and can last forever.

Now, when it comes to giving birth, she is once again in a passive position, she is sad and disappointed.

Think about a woman's life, isn't getting married and having children just a few major events in life? Shandan thinks about herself, the hasty marriage and the helplessness of having children, maybe there are countless ups and downs waiting for her in the future.

She regretted a little that she had taken Gu Haiping too far, making him think that he would not be able to live without him, and he was easy to talk about and even bullied.

What woman doesn't want to have a grand wedding? Marry yourself in style, after all, this is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, and it is also a turning point in life. Although Shandan cares more about married life, she doesn't want to burden Gu Haiping for a formality, but what will he think? What does his family think? Can he understand his intentions?

Didn't he say that he would not give himself grievances, and that he would take care of her and love her for the rest of his life? Now, why was he so eager to kill this child regardless of her safety and consequences?

Shandan even wanted to break up with Gu Haiping if he wanted the child to be killed, maybe he was not worthy of her waiting for him all his life, and he was not her life's dependence.

Gu Haiping didn't insist anymore, he didn't speak again, he just said that since he was back, he would go home and ask Shandan to go back with him, Shandan didn't shirk, and the two got on the bus Gu Haiping's house.

In April, the grassland is still depressed, there is no sign of life, the yellow wind is howling, the sand and dust are blowing all over the sky, the high and low hills are connected, and the yellow dead grass is on it, and the mood of Shandan is also like this scene of yellow sand is barren.

She didn't have tears, but her heart became cold inch by inch.

She wants to see what kind of attitude his family will have, could it be that they will also ask her to have an abortion?

Shandan thought in his heart that if the child was killed, this would be the end of the child's life, and it would also be the end of her relationship with Gu Haiping.

She remained silent all the way, and Gu Haiping was equally silent, thinking about her own thoughts.

Gu Haiping thought: No matter how educated or open up this woman is, she is a troublesome animal! It's not that she never wants children, but she doesn't want them for the time being, why is she so sad? So resistant? Isn't it just a simple operation? As for such a terrible thing that seems to be fatal? Why doesn't she understand the obvious truth?

When the two arrived at Gu Haiping's house, they simply said hello to Shandan and went to the west room to rest, Gu Haiping didn't know how to talk to the family about the child.

When dinner time came, Gu's mother saw that Shandan was unhappy and unspirited, so she asked, "Shandan are you motion sickness?" ”

"Oh no, maybe tired. Shandan replied wearily.

Gu's mother turned her face to her son, her son didn't seem to be happy, Gu's mother had some doubts in her heart, this pair of people has always been happy and loving each other, and it seems a little contradictory to look at today's appearance.

Looking at the greasy food, Shandan felt a wave of nausea attack, she hurriedly ran to the yard to vomit, but only retched a few times, and then she didn't feel it, and Shandan simply didn't go to eat and went back to the west room to sleep.

Gu's mother saw Shandan's appearance and understood that Shandan was there, but why were both of them unhappy?

After the meal, Gu's mother asked her son what was going on? Having a child is a happy event, why are the two of them still unhappy?

Gu Haiping expressed his plans and thoughts, and also said that Shandan was reluctant to kill the child.

Gu's mother came to talk to Shandan in the west room, she wanted to persuade her son to dispel the idea of killing the child, and also wanted to persuade Shandan to understand her son's thoughts, but the bald and stupid Gu's mother did not say anything to comfort Shandan, but heard that their family wanted her to kill the child.

Shandan was very angry, and she walked out of the gate alone, and walked towards the small river beach where the setting sun was slanting, where there was a babbling river, and every time they came back, they would walk hand in hand to the river, catch a few loaches in the summer, and skate on the ice of the river in the winter.

The wind has subsided, the April ice has melted, the clear river is flowing slowly, and Shandan is calming down a bit. She thinks that her life is her original choice, and she has to face it no matter what, so that her heart is more rational and dredged, and it may be good to be less stubborn.

She walked along the path between the rivers, the scattered poplar trees in the distance were still looking at the blue sky alone, and a few black crows were "croaking, croaking", and the spring in the north had not yet arrived, and the magpies were already busy building new nests and preparing to lay eggs to raise their offspring.

She walked along the embankment, and saw that the toad that woke up early also began to struggle for childbearing, and the male toad, which had been small, lay tightly on a huge female toad, and zigzagged down the current, like two lifeless leaves floating on the water, Shandan picked up a branch and poked the male frog on his back, and they actually quickly retracted their feet and fled quickly.