Desperate Situation 2001.5.17

Mom is old. Pen % fun % Pavilion www.biquge.info

I recently resigned from a pharmaceutical company. I joined the flow of people looking for a job in the Chongqing Guanyinqiao Talent Market.

The office clerks recruited by the job market must be under the age of 25, have a bachelor's degree, have English level 4 or above, and have a computer typing speed of 80-100 words - these are extremely limiting for mothers. Although I can still cope with writing, I am a junior college graduate, and I only have a college level of English, and I have not studied computers. Most of the mothers in the unit can't even hand in their resumes. During this period, I applied for three jobs one after another.

The first applicant was Tongli Advertising Company, and the applicant was the director of the Administration Department. I studied family planning management (including clinical medicine) in college, so I thought it would be handy, but this is not the case. The boss of the advertising agency was very satisfied with the company rules and regulations I had drafted, and asked me to start implementing them the next day. So, the next day, I got into the role with confidence. There is always a big gap between reality and ideals, and my implementation plan hit the ground with the head of human resources. I remember that she seemed to have violated two rules at that time, but she refused to accept the punishment. A system has been discussed and approved by several departments, and the CEO has also reviewed and signed to agree to implement it, but when the specific party is also a leader, there are many obstacles and cannot be carried out. Later, I learned that she was the wife of the CEO, and I also learned that the PR manager was the CEO's younger brother, and the other department managers also had relatives such as the CEO's nephew. A system that cannot be enforced is useless, and I don't think there is any point in staying any longer.

The second applicant is Chongqing Economic XX News, and the position applied for is a reporter. I thought I would be able to get the job done with my writing skills. On the first day, the team leader assigned me the task: "You have to go to the market within three days to investigate and complete the sales of various brands of refrigerators this year, and write a manuscript and hand it to me." "Oh my God, three days, how is that possible? Besides, I used to write literary manuscripts, where did I write anything about economics? I took the task head-on, and on the first day I ran a few department stores and found nothing. The main reason is that I lack knowledge in sales, I know that I can't meet the requirements of the job, and there is still a big difference between economics and pure literature. I had no choice but to resign.

The third applicant is the Southern XX Hotel, and the task is to sell hotel rooms to various units. I did it for a week, and the manager was more satisfied, I thought that I could go back to Rongchang to see you on the weekend, but I didn't expect the manager to say to me that this job is only a vacation once a month, and it can't be taken off before the holiday. That night, I suddenly missed you very much, my heart ached, and I couldn't help but cry. The thought of seeing you in a month suddenly became unbearable. I wrote a letter of resignation overnight, put it in the manager's office the next day, and bought a ticket back to Rongchang before my salary was settled. The manager called me more than ten times, and I didn't dare to answer, I felt that I was too useless.

I haven't found a job for over a month.

I only have a few dozen yuan on my body, how can I pay your tuition and living expenses? Your father still hasn't paid for his living expenses, what can I do? I didn't want my parents to worry, and I didn't want my friends to sympathize, so I had to do it myself. Worried, I fell ill and lay weak in a rented house in Chongqing, depressed. For more than a month, I swallowed kimchi and drank porridge, and the idea of becoming a monk sprouted several times. If you become a nun, you may be a hundred. But how can I give up you, my dear baby? What sins did I do in my previous life that I need to repay in this life?

That day, my good friend Zhao Hongjiu came to see me, and when she saw my appearance of not being a ghost or a ghost, she almost cried. She immediately gave me 200 yuan. I don't accept it, how can a woman I am so proud of be so depressed as to accept alms? I'd better die!

Child, how I love and miss you! I'm going to have to cheer you up! You are now the only hope to sustain my mother's survival, and I want to live strong for you. Since I chose to give birth to you in the first place, I am responsible for you. Mom will find a job as soon as possible and try to save money for a good education for you. No matter what kind of torture I suffered, I would stand and smile to greet me. I will not let misery and poverty befall you, I will make you a true man!

Now that I think about it, several jobs have not been completed, there are objective reasons, and the subjective reasons are in me. I do have character flaws, and I am very impulsive and irrational. When something went wrong, I didn't try to solve it, I just ran away. Here, I would like to sincerely apologize to the people who once trusted me in recruiting me: I'm sorry!

Out of the predicament2001.8.30

I got a job at a community hospital. To be a community doctor, the probation period is 500 yuan. Although this is far from enough for our living expenses, it is better than being unemployed. I met many well-known professors in the community hospital and listened to many new lectures, only to realize that I had too little knowledge and too much to learn. Because the clinical knowledge I had learned was useless for a long time, I was afraid of being looked down upon by the professors, so I had to adapt as soon as possible and read books every day.

This community hospital is the first community hospital in Chongqing, with a relatively comprehensive department, and can also perform surgery and obstetrics and gynecology surgeries. The doctors looked at me hard and took good care of me. Some hepatobiliary surgeries and obstetrics and gynecology surgeries in the Department of Surgery let me observe and learn, and some even let me be the second assistant and the first assistant. It was also in this learning process that I clarified the direction of my future work: to become a qualified doctor. I made an important decision: I decided to borrow money to further my education. Because Aunt Zhao Hongjiu is a dermatologist, she may leave the hospital, so I can go back to work in the dermatology department of the hospital after I finish my studies, and I can be with my heart and liver baby again. Healing and saving lives is an honorable profession, and I will strive to learn this subject well and engage in this noble profession with my rich knowledge and experience.

Child, you are all the pain and all the love in your mother's heart. Needless to say, love is painful because you have lost your father's love and care. One day, your father called you, and you were overjoyed and excited all day—Father's love, so much concern for you, I wonder what your father thought in his heart, and how he was willing to leave you? A few days ago, Xiang Xiaodong (your father's friend) mother returned from Kunming and told his grandmother: Your father is obedient to that woman, fetching her with bathwater, feeding her, giving her rings, etc. I felt a pain in my heart when I heard this, and I felt a lot of emotion: he had never treated me like this before, it seems that I really had the wrong fate with him, and maybe it was wrong at the beginning.

There are no living expenses, and I don't earn much money in Chongqing Community Hospital, so I can only take out the insurance of more than 2,000 yuan saved for you last year and use it.

I'm so sorry, baby.

Tourism 2001.8.31

Last week, my grandparents took you to Chongqing to see your mother.

They specially take you on the train from Xi'an to Chongqing via Rongchang. I heard that when you saw the train, you shouted excitedly: "Grandpa, come on, come and see the train!" It caused passers-by to look sideways, thinking that you were a child from the countryside and had never seen a train. When I heard this, I felt very sad. You are so good, but because your mother has an unstable job and no money in her hands, she can't let you get an education in a good school in Chongqing. Forgive me, child.

I took you to a tree in Nanshan to see the lights of thousands of homes in the mountain city, we went to Carrefour hypermarket to buy toys for you, we went to Chongqing Department Store to buy clothes for you, we went to Jiajia Whole Grain King to eat snacks and so on, I can only do this. Seeing your little face flushed with excitement and seeing your happy eyes, I feel that everything is worth it.

If you are happy, your mother will be happy.

On August 27th, I asked a friend to take you to Chengdu again. You went to Emei Mountain, Qingcheng Mountain, Leshan Giant Buddha, Dujiangyan, etc. -- my mother was already in debt, and she had to eat pickles for a few months. It doesn't matter, I finally fulfilled one of my parents' wishes.

My grandfather and grandmother fell in love in Chengdu 32 years ago and have never returned to Chengdu for 32 years. I've always dreamed of getting them back to where their first love was again. Because their love union will give birth to me, and I will have you as a baby, how grateful I am to God for arranging their acquaintance and love. Now it's finally done!

You called out to your mother on the phone: "Mom, I called your name on Qingcheng Mountain!" ”

"Why did you call me?"

"Li Hua, Mom! Li Hua's mother! ”

A wave of tenderness welled up in my heart. Good son, my dearest baby, mom loves you forever!

Kindergarten 2001.9.3-2001.10.3

Today is the first day of your second year of kindergarten.

Mom got up at six in the morning. I really want to send you to school in person, but my mother has to take the morning bus to Chongqing to work. Looking at your sleeping face and smelling your body fragrance, my mother kissed and kissed, and it was difficult to leave. Child, mom is not always by your side, you have to be careful. Don't fight with children, don't be bullied, and know how to protect yourself. Mom will always be concerned about you.

It's been more than 20 days, and when I returned to Rongchang, I finally saw you again after school.

You hugged your mother's head and kissed her, and suddenly said, "Today, the child pinched my ****** and told me to smell his feet." ”

Mom was terrified and was busy checking your body and relieved to see that you were okay. I say to you, "Whoever does it again in the future, you will hit him." "Son, my mother really had to ask you to do this. You are so timid without a father, and you are the youngest in kindergarten, and you are often bullied by children, and you dare not say anything. One time after something happened, we went to kindergarten the next day. When I ask you to point out which child is bullying you, and the teacher next to me encourages you, you still don't dare to identify that child.

Pull a hair and move the whole body, you are my flesh, you are my heart and liver, you are always bullied by others and make my mother feel so painful! How long can mom protect you? You'll have to walk the road on your own! Perhaps after these setbacks, you will know the difficulties of the world and work hard; Maybe you'll become even more cowardly. If it was the former, I would be glad; If it were the latter, what kind of pain would I endure. Child, all the injuries you have suffered are a huge blow to your mother! As long as I don't fall, I swear, I will do everything in my power to protect you, my darling!