I went to kindergarten 2000.9.1-11.24

Today is your first day of kindergarten. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

Today you are one year, eight months and six days.

Wake up early to prepare breakfast, school stuff, and bedding for napping.

You're still asleep. The early morning sun shines on your little face through the triangular plum on the balcony, and the dappled light and shadow appear warm and bright. Looking at your unfamiliar face, my mood is very complicated. You have gradually grown up, and while you are happy for you, you feel that you are getting farther and farther away from me, which is really reluctant. Someone once said: Give your child more hugs when you can give him more hugs. The first thing I do when I get off work every day is to hug you, and I can't let go for a long time. But you've begun to struggle to get out of my arms, and you've got your own thoughts, how long can I hold you? You have never left us, today you will be alone with others, will you get used to it? Would you blame your mother for sending you to kindergarten at the age of one year and eight months? Child, now that the social competition is so strong, I am afraid that if my mother dies suddenly, you alone will not be able to cope with this complex world, so my mother sent you to kindergarten early, so I want you to learn to be strong, learn to be self-reliant, and learn to survive the fittest.

Originally, kindergartens did not accept children under the age of two. On the day of enrollment registration, grandma will take you to play. When the teacher saw you singing and dancing next to you, and counting more than 20 digits in his mouth, several teachers immediately came around to watch you perform, and you danced more energetically. At the end, you clapped your hands and said, "I'm dancing well!" "Teasing the teachers, the principal immediately decided to accept you. Baby, you have been so good since you were a child, I believe you will not disappoint your mother.

I heard my grandfather say that when I handed you over to the teacher, you meant that you were leaving your family, and I cried heartbreakingly. How sorry Mom feels for you! Baby, but you have to adapt to kindergarten life, you will get used to it.

Gradually, you will get used to life in kindergarten. After a period of time, your sleep and diet have improved, and it seems that your mother's hard work has not been in vain. Every day when you go home, you perform for us the songs, dances, games, and so on. Clever you always change "a big yellow dog, want to eat meat and bones" to "a big yellow dog, want to eat lollipops", and at the end of the "Wang" bark twice, making us laugh, grandma immediately understood what you meant, and immediately offered the candy you want to eat.

Child, you are your mother's pistachio and everyone's baby.

After two months of kindergarten, you can now memorize Tang poems "Hoe He", "One, Two, Three, Four, Five", "Song of the Goose", "Climbing the Stork's Tower", "Silent Night Thoughts", count to 50, can sing dozens of nursery rhymes, and recognize more than a dozen words.

I was talking about your strengths before, and now my mother is going to talk about your shortcomings.

Child, your temper is too stubborn, a little unsatisfactory, immediately roll on the spot, grandpa's stick can't scare you, don't stop until you achieve your goal. Once my grandfather put a lot of red stripes on your calves, and you still didn't give up. Whenever this happens, it's the hardest time for me. Fighting, reluctant; If you don't fight, I'm afraid I'll indulge you. How angry it makes me that you forced my mother to commit it in such a way! Every time you cry for a long time, you cough, and then you cough up what you eat, and you can't breathe, and I can't do it. Child, I love you from the bottom of my heart, but I really don't want to love you so much. These extreme methods that you want to take to achieve your goal are only temporary, and Mom would rather believe that your little mind is not sensible, okay?

Two years old 2000.10.25

Today, you turn two years old.

Your father congratulated you on the phone, but he didn't come. Half a year ago, on "Children's Day", he didn't come to you for the festival when he was a few kilometers away in Guangshun. I thought: he was really ruthless. Saying this may be a blow to you, maybe he is in a helpless situation now. Don't blame him, don't let your mother's emotions affect your love for him.

The whole family lit the birthday candles for you, and you clapped your little hands and sang the birthday song.

You're two years old.

Time flies, what is not worth cherishing? It's just that when you say "Dad", when you sit at the head of the bed and pick up the phone every night and say, "Dad, what am I, I miss you", you are stabbing your mother's heart with a knife! However, I can't stop you, I want the image of my father to live forever in your heart, and I can only hide this knife-like heartbreak and pain with drunkenness. How difficult it is to forget, but how can your young mind understand this? You are just calling for family affection with the instinct of life!

In order to fulfill your wish to miss your father, I even took you to Longchang twice (he later came to Longchang to open a sliced fish shop). My heart broke when I watched your father and the woman hug and laugh. Every time I came back, I was seriously ill. Son, for the sake of your mental health and for you to grow up happily, I would rather make such a sacrifice, I would rather suffer and be humiliated. I can't make you feel like you're missing a father's love, and I can't let you live in the gloom and melancholy of a single-parent family. Son, I hope you can appreciate your mother's painstaking efforts.

I wish you happiness, peace and healthy growth!

Happy birthday!

Father Visit2000.11.25-12.20

You say you miss your dad.

After work, I picked you up from kindergarten and took a bus to Longchang. It was already more than seven o'clock in the evening when I arrived in Longchang, and it was raining lightly. you

When Dad sees you, the first thing he asks, "Is there something wrong?" ”

I said, "Bring the child to see you." ”

He takes you with a gloomy face. As soon as I saw the shadow of the woman next to me, I regretted it. Afterwards, I'll take you to a nearby restaurant for dinner. During this time, your father came to see you, and the woman followed suit.

I said, "You don't have to be nervous, I'm just bringing my son to see you and let him enjoy his father's love, and I won't destroy you." ”

Your father said, "What am I nervous about? Then he went to the fish shop next door and talked and laughed with the woman surnamed Zhang.

No one paid any attention to us. I'll feed you with tears in my eyes, and then carry you next door.

Your father's friend Wen San said, "Leave the child here and leave!" ”

I didn't speak, and I'll never bet on you, my beloved son.

The rain was getting heavier and heavier, and I was cold and hungry, but your father turned a blind eye. When I think of the scene when he took off his coat and draped it over me when I was in love, my heart was like a knife. But in front of them, I forced a smile, and I didn't want them to see me in pain, that's all. The rain and the wind went straight to the bottom of my heart, and my whole body was as cold as if I had entered an ice cellar, and all hope was shattered.

After some time, your aunt took you to see your father. I went to Longchang with a letter written to your father in advance. When I got there, I gave the letter to your aunt and forwarded it to your father, and I went to the teahouse myself to wait for you. After a while, my aunt came back with you in her arms, saying that your father had gone to play mahjong with that woman. As soon as I heard that he still had money to gamble, and refused to pay your medical bills and tuition, my anger came up at once. I immediately took you to the mahjong parlor to find him but didn't see him, and left a message to the boss, telling him to go back to the fish shop to see me immediately. Two hours later, he and the woman returned. When he heard that he was asked to pay for his living expenses, he said, "No! ”

"What son do you have no money for? Then you can kill me and my son! "I was so angry that I couldn't say anything.

"You threaten me?" He was menacing.

My poor and lovely son, at this time, I saw you go up to your father, stretch out your right hand, and say, "Father, mother is so pitiful, take the money." ”

Looking at your dark eyes and listening to your delicate words, I suddenly felt extremely sorry for my actions. I regret taking you to Longchang, I regret arguing in front of you, I regret bringing you here to ask for living expenses, and I regret the psychological impact of all this. Baby, I hope your innocent heart is not overshadowed by this, forgive Mom, okay?

I said to your father, "I was impulsive, please forgive me. I'll never bring my children to see you again, and I'll never ask you for living expenses. If you are willing to see the child, you can go back to Rongchang to see it yourself, and if you are willing to take the living expenses, I will never look for you again. I hope you take care! With that, I burst into tears.

Sadness is an indescribable pain! I wish I had all my sorrows to myself from now on!