Before I knew it, we had been out for more than two hours, and the sunlight was slowly getting stronger and stronger, and I could see the sweat coming out of Le Fan's forehead. Pen? Interesting? Pavilion wWw. ｂiquge。 ｉｎfo

We have walked to the foot of Taishan Mountain, an almost straight stone ladder appeared in front of us, the starting place of the stone ladder, next to a stone tablet, with bright red paint to fill the grooves of the stone tablet without distinguishing, showing the word 'Taishan'.

Yesterday, I passed by in the car, but I didn't notice that there was a stone tablet here. However, at that time, most of the attention was focused on Le Fan's two or three classmates, and it seemed normal not to see it.

There were trees planted next to the stele, and Le Fan and I walked to the stele, sheltering from the warm sun, she stroked the dusty stele with her hand, and suddenly hooked the corners of her lips and smiled gently.

I looked up at the stone staircase that made my feet soft when I looked at it, and asked, "Shall we go up?" ”

Le Fan's gaze also fell on the stone staircase, and then nodded.

I'm worried about her body, "Your body isn't ...... well"

But I stopped before I could finish my words, and my body was not yet well......

In the end, I just changed the word, "Okay." ”

Le Fan turned his head to look at me, as if he smiled helplessly, but he didn't say anything, and then looked away.

Feeling the air slowly starting to get hot, I suggested, "Let's rest for a while, we've walked this way, rest for a while and then go up." ”

Le Fan didn't object, I unscrewed the lid of mineral water for her, she smiled at me gratefully, and then began to drink the water in small sips.

I looked at her for a moment, then lowered my head and unscrewed the lid of my mineral water, but I didn't drink it.

I looked at the emotion in Le Fan's eyes, and found something to say: "Can you tell me about your planned future with Zhang Yiyang?" ”

Le Fan turned his head to look at me, and then he didn't know if he remembered something, he couldn't help but laugh when he lowered his head, his shoulders trembled slightly, "Well, I planned the future of me and him......"

She stretched out her voice, thought for a while, and then looked into the distance and said: "You know, I am not a person who likes to conceive of the future, I prefer to grasp the present, no one can predict what will happen in the future, I don't like this kind of assumption without certainty." It was the first time I had such a big expectation for the future, and I couldn't even think about where we were going to live in the future, or even how many children we were going to have. ”

Le Fan said, and once again couldn't help but chuckle, as if she was helpless that she had such thoughts about herself.

She would not deny that at that naïve age, she had such expectations.

"It's just a pity that so many of my ideas came to naught in the end!"

There was silence for a few more seconds before she continued: "Perhaps, the reason why I can't let go is also because I have paid so much for this relationship and imagined so much. When those ideas can really only become a dream for me, I can't accept it, I can't let go, it's very normal! ”

I nodded, indeed, in the past, we were all persuading Le Fan to let go, but if a relationship can really be let go so easily, then this person shouldn't have much use for this feeling.

Not to mention anything else, just take the boyfriends that Le Fan had after Zhang Yiyang, Le Fan can now remember a few things they did when they were together. And what happened when he was dating Zhang Yiyang, after many years, Le Fan can still recall it so clearly, and it can be seen that Le Fan really paid his heart for that feeling.

I thought back to what Le Fan said just now, and I didn't understand a little, so I asked: "You and Zhang Yiyang were indeed separated on the bridge, but you didn't break up at that time." ”

Le Fan sighed and smiled again, "It's true that we didn't break up at that time, but that was the last time the two of us were together, and it can be regarded as a breakup!" ”

She thought for a moment and continued: "Actually, even then, although I had a hunch that we might not have a good time for a while, I never thought that we would break up like this. ”

"What happened next?" I looked at her distressedly and asked.

Le Fan quietly looked at the mountain opposite, and continued for a long time: "After I went home, my mother and I really had a big fight. My mother complained loudly to my dad with red eyes, in fact, I also knew that she also felt wronged, and my daughter, who had been so obedient since she was a child, suddenly yelled at her, and my mother couldn't accept it, or rather, I'm afraid no one could accept it. ”

"And my dad also frowned deeply when he heard Mother You's complaints, he wasn't there at the time, and he didn't know what was going on, but looking at me and my mom were aggrieved, standing between me and my mom, my dad probably didn't know who to help, no matter who he hurt, it wasn't what he wanted to see."

"What did Uncle do in the end?" I'll talk.

Le Fan still lowered his head, "I was already very uncomfortable at that time, and I didn't know what would happen to myself and Zhang Yiyang, so I was even more irritable, and when I heard Mother You's reproach, I was already sad and a little more angry, so I yelled at my mother, I have so many friends with me, but she doesn't save me any face." ”

She paused again.

"I never had the ability to do what I wanted to do, it was always her saying I would do one thing, I was really fed up, I wanted to hang out with my friends, I didn't want to stay at home, I couldn't do anything."

"That time, I finally burst out all the grievances and resentments that had been buried in my heart for a long time, I didn't really want to be a good student, I also wanted to do what I wanted like everyone else, even if it seemed incomprehensible to others."

When he said this, Le Fan was a little astringent, and his voice was slightly lower.

"At that time, I was so trying to get out of my parents' grip, well, in my opinion, everything they asked of me was control. I obviously don't like to read, but I have to read with all my heart, sometimes I feel very lost, sometimes I feel very tired. ”

"I still remember when I was in the fourth grade of primary school, my grades slipped and I finished fourth, and just that time, my dad tore my award certificate to shreds, and they never looked at my efforts, they only needed a result, which was incomprehensible in my eyes at the time."

At first glance, I was stunned when I heard Le Fan say this, and I tore her award certificate to shreds because of the decline in her grades, is this really what Dad You would do?

I tried hard to recall the appearance of Father You, but I shook my head helplessly, I really didn't connect the two people.

"I can't understand them, just like they can't understand her. In fact, later in high school, I was thinking, if I had poor grades since I was a child, would they not have given her so many expectations, would I have been able to live a little easier, and there would be no disappointment without expectations, right? ”

Le Fan lowered his head seriously and thought for a moment, and then continued: "But thinking about it on another level, if I have poor grades since I was a child, maybe I will drop out of school after graduating from junior high school, then what awaits me is a part-time job, marriage, and childbirth, is this kind of life what I want?" ”

Listening to Le Fan's remarks, my originally low mood suddenly improved a little, I couldn't stop laughing, it seems that Le Fan is really as she said, a more contradictory person.

However, thinking like this, I can't help but be sad, maybe it's really because of this, so Le Fan will think more about it later.

So I said: "In fact, everything has pros and cons, in fact, sometimes even if you can analyze the pros and cons, people's feelings will inevitably not drive you to choose the way that does more harm than good, at this time, in fact, as long as you can be worthy of your own heart." We can't do everything perfectly, we can only know how to make trade-offs and choose what we want. ”

Le Fan turned his head to look at me, and suddenly sneered, "Luo Su, you are this old pedant and began to educate me again, but why do I obviously not like to hear this kind of big truth, but the big truth that comes out of your mouth, I always feel so reasonable?" ”

I also smiled helplessly, I really want to say, Le Fan, I don't have any family, I don't have many friends, my profession is destined to be reasonable, others say that I am excellent in my field, but why is it in you, I am derelict in my duty.

You say that I like to talk about big truths, but do you know that in fact, you are the one who likes to talk about big truths the most, but what we all know is that neither you nor I can convince ourselves of our truths.

"Hehe, that proves that what I said is really reasonable!" I said lightly, and both of them couldn't help but laugh.

Le Fan continued: "But then I also realized that apart from studying, my family has no way to afford me to do other meaningful things, and I have no other way to choose or go except studying. I've heard a saying before: whether you are rich or poor, everyone starts from the same place. ”

When Le Fan said this, he couldn't help but pout.

"Originally, I was convinced of this, but then I realized that it is true that everyone has the same starting point, but the life path of a rich person can have many forks in the road, and if one road does not work, you can change the other until you meet the road you like. But poor people are different, they usually have only one way to go, no matter how difficult it is, even if their heads are broken and bleeding, they can only go on hard, because the end of not being able to go on is to be eliminated and buried silently. ”

I also nodded in agreement, Le Fan and I are not from a good background, maybe my family is richer than Le Fan's, but those are not mine. What I want, I still need to fight and fight for myself.

"I don't like to read, although I like to read, but it's not mathematics, physics and chemistry; I love history, but it definitely doesn't include a history exam; I like poetry, but I don't like the conformist way of answering questions; I like biology, but it's just because I've watched "Man and Nature" with my dad a lot, and I'm just interested in it...... I've been reading books for so many years, but I still haven't learned how to study and how to get high grades, because what I like has never been what teachers need. ”

I also deeply understand Le Fan's exclamation.