I just sat in the room in a daze, now my thoughts are messy, lying on my bed is the legendary god Nezha, all kinds of novels, movies and TV series portrayal the image of three heads and six arms omnipotent, but just now, I saw him being electrocuted by the civil electricity like a fool, until now has not eased up.

His appearance directly subverted my perception of this world, how many secrets of this planet are there that we have never known? I am a serious child, born poor and have no future, why did he come to me?

There were so many things in my head that I had a headache, and I smoked cigarettes one after another, and before I knew it, half an hour had passed.

"Ouch~~~~ It's so uncomfortable for me!" Nezha finally relieved himself, he sat up straight with his hands on the bed, and after a short pause, he jumped to the ground and began to move: "What was that just now, how did I feel like I was struck by thunder."

Nonsense, 380 volts of electricity!

"Are you really Nezha?" I've been thinking about it, this Nezha should be a deformity with three heads and six arms, but no matter how you look at it, this one is just an ordinary child.

"You still don't believe me? Why don't I fly you another one? ”

"Don't fly, I believe it!" I just flew once and almost didn't electrocute the girl, and if I fly again, if I jump on the high voltage, then I have to pay it back? This will cause a short circuit in the surrounding power to damage the power equipment, and it will be punished if you catch it: "I just want to know why you came to me." ”

"I don't know, my father called me here, why did I come here, I have to wait for him to come down to find out."

Yo! Listen to what he means, King Tota Li is also coming! What's going on? The immortals came to me in a team, could it be that I still have a great background? No, my family has been a commoner for generations, and my parents have done nothing, otherwise I wouldn't even be able to solve the problem of work? Otherwise, what star in the sky would I descend from the sky?

"And when is he coming?" I'm very curious, after all, with my brain, I can't think of a reason for Nezha's father and son to come, and I'm afraid I can only wait for Li Jing to come to have an answer.

"I don't know, it should be there tonight at the latest, by the way, your surname is Jiang, right?"

I nodded yes, and Nezha said again: "Is it called Jiang Xiaoming?" ”

"yes, what's wrong?"

"That's right, my father gave me the coordinates before, and the location is yours, but when I arrived, I met such a stupid mortal as you, I was worried that I would make a mistake, so I will confirm it."

Nezha is not ashamed to say this, I can hear my mother scolded in my heart, fuck your uncle, I haven't said anything to touch the wires for more than 20 years, who the hell is stupid?

But I can only scold in my heart, I don't dare to say it, Nezha is a character with mana, if you want to scold him and beat me up, I'm afraid I will have to be a flat if I am saved.

"You're going to live here, huh?" Nezha just moved his body, and when it was fine, he walked around the house like a leader.

"That's right, the humble house is shabby, and I'm smiling." If you extrapolate according to the records in the novel, Nezha is now at least 3,000 years old, and he is considered an ancient person, and when talking to the ancients, I also unconsciously dragged up the classical Chinese.

"You're still in a humble house?" Nezha smiled and said, "You're a pigsty at most." ”

"What the hell are you going to do? Does my family have anything to do with you? Wouldn't you be happy to stay with this and that trouble you to go out? "I'm also really hot, this quality is still immortal? Seeing that you were electrified, Lao Tzu kindly gave you first aid, and also carried you to lie on my own bed, now it's okay to say a word, heartless, so angry that I am angry, saying that he is ignorant and has lived for thousands of years, so old is like a retarded person, hey! This grandson shouldn't be stupid, right?

"Hey! What are you angry about, I'm not talking nonsense, your room is too small and messy. "Nezha said this, I remembered, his father is the chief soldier of Chen Tangguan, put it now, how should it be a provincial military commander or something, his house does not need me to say, it must not be small, and I, a lonely family, the room will take a long time to tidy up once, and I don't blame him for thinking that I am similar to a pigsty, maybe compared to my room is not as good as their pigsty.

At this point, I am relieved, Nezha is the second generation of officials, and his view of things must be different from my **, what do I care about with him?

"By the way, do you have a latrine?" Nezha suddenly said this coldly.

"Yes, you immortals still go to the toilet?" I was interested in his question, and they all said that immortals don't eat fireworks in the world, so where does it come from?

"What's so strange about this, it's like you eat and don't excrete......"

"Sizzle! No, doesn't the book say that you don't eat the fireworks of the world? ”

"Cowardice! How is it possible that we have a banquet in heaven every now and then. ”

Nezha said this, I remembered, didn't the book mention the fairy to make the peach banquet, the hundred flowers banquet, I don't know who said that the gods don't eat the fireworks in the world, so I mistakenly think that the gods don't even eat things.

"That's it." Although my room is a self-built house in the countryside, the space is not small, about 25 square meters, and the room is equipped with a toilet.

Nezha stood at the door but didn't go in for a long time, I was very strange: "What's wrong?" ”

"You're a new latrine, aren't you? I'm too embarrassed to go into ......."

His words amused me, no wonder, the Shang Dynasty would have no tiles and flushing system, that dirty appearance is self-evident, I held back a smile and began to explain to him the correct use of the toilet, especially focusing on how to use toilet paper, I heard that ancient people used toilet chips to scrape their buttocks, toilet chips are that kind of small sticks, he will pull the poop for a while and use my toothbrush as a toilet chip, then I will fucking collapse......

Serving Nezha into the toilet, looking at the sky that is gradually becoming darker, I can't help but start thinking about what to eat tonight, originally I bought enough food for me alone, looking at the current situation Nezha will not leave for a while and a half, dinner is estimated to be in my place, the food is not enough, the vegetable market should almost be closed, there is really no way I can only go out to buy some cold dishes to make do, after all, you can't take him down to the restaurant even if Nezha is dressed up.

I was thinking about it, but I heard the sound of pumping water from the toilet, Nezha's action was very fast, and it was over in three or two clicks, which is very different from our modern people, modern people go to the toilet, and do not play for more than ten or twenty minutes The mobile phone will not come out of it casually.

"Huh! Do you have a spoon here? Nezha didn't come out after going to the toilet, and poked out half of his head from inside and asked mysteriously.

I'm wondering, why do you need a spoon for? But I didn't ask much, I handed over a soup spoon, Nezha took it and smiled thief, and got out of the toilet with his hands behind his back, with a chicken thief on his face: "I'll show you something." ”

I was dazed and puzzled, "What? ”

Nezha violently spread the things hidden behind him in front of me, I looked down and almost didn't vomit, this dog took the plate of mosquito coils in my toilet and took a plate of stool, and I don't know what he ate, a plate full of thin poop, and a spoon I just gave him on it......

"I'll fuck you uncle!" This is so fucking infuriating, I don't care if I am a god or not, I am about to beat him with my fists, this dog flashed back, and said with a smile: "Talking is a word, you said that if I can fly, you will eat shit, what?" Tricks? ”

"I'll play tricks on your sister." I was about to catch up, and at this juncture, I suddenly heard someone downstairs shouting: "Someone is nobody?" ”

As soon as I heard this voice, I thought that no one could come in when the door was closed, and someone downstairs estimated that Li Jing was coming, so I angrily pushed open the door and said to Nezha: "You wait for me, and let your dad clean up your dog day later." ”

Out of the room, I leaned on the railing outside and said downstairs: "Someone, is it Li Jing, the king of Tota?" ”

But as soon as I said this, I found out that it was wrong, because leaning on the fence, I could clearly see the appearance of the people downstairs, Li Jing, as the commander of the garrison of the heavenly court and the example of the traditional immortals, must be majestic and extraordinary, and it is absolutely impossible to dye that kind of colorful explosive head, and I am standing downstairs, not to mention dressing, just looking at the hairstyle is a serious killing Matt......

"This ...... Is this your dad? I pointed downstairs to Kill Matt and asked Nezha, who also walked out of the door.

"That's how your dad looks." Nezha was also at a loss, looking up and down at Kill Matt downstairs, it seemed that he probably didn't know this young man either.

"Your surname is Jiang, right?" Kill Matt asked.

I nodded and said, "yes, who are you?" "I can't stop searching for the impression of this person in my mind, but I have never made such a friend in my memory, looking at the locked door, I feel that this person is wrong no matter how I look at it, where did he come out?

"That's it." Killing Matt didn't answer my question, so he ran up the corridor and said, "I'm still worried about running in the wrong place, yo!" Third son, are you so fat now? ”

Nezha heard this person directly say his name, and he was even more puzzled: "We know each other?" ”

Kill Matt smiled: "What, you can't recognize me when I change my appearance?" ”

, your appearance has changed, who the can still recognize you!

Killing Matt didn't treat himself as an outsider, and after going upstairs, he went straight into the house, and I could only follow behind stupidly, asking, "Eh! Who are you? ”

Kill Matt didn't answer, and when he entered the house, he saw the on the table that Nezha had just pulled, and said with a smile: "Yo, you guys are eating." ”

I felt sick when I thought of the pile of poop, and I couldn't help retching, and when I slowed down and killed Matt, I was already sitting at the table, only to see him grab the soup spoon on the top, dig a full spoonful and put it in his mouth, and muttered: "What is this eating?" Porridge? ”

……