"Love is overvalued" - Sigmund Freud

The accumulation of sex has led to people's exaggerated exaggeration of the holiness and nobility of love. Pen % fun % Pavilion www.biquge.info

If the pent-up desires are not sublimated, love will inevitably be intertwined with desire, and it will be impatient.

And the meaning of sexuality is not limited to physiological.

There is an obscure connection between emotional repression and catharsis, between truth and disguise, and sexuality.

In June, the peach and plum fell.

The students have thrown their bachelor's hats into the air and stepped into the vast social stream with vigor.

City A, University M.

Quiet campus, empty dormitories

Kouchi was lying on the only top bunk with futon still covered.

Dull, confused eyes staring at the monotonous ceiling.

This scene evokes memories of his first days in school.

At that time, he was staring blankly at the ceiling as he was now.

But in my heart, there is more longing and yearning for the future.

But at this moment, there is endless melancholy and doubt in my heart.

"What should I do?"

Xiao Nei asked himself this countless times in his heart.

Like birds out of the cage, the students happily flew to the colorful society to find their new home.

However, I feel that the road ahead is so bleak and physically and mentally exhausted.

"This is the beginning of life!"

This is how people often describe graduating college students.

However, this sentence does not seem to apply to Xiao Nei.

He is no longer naïve, no longer longing, no longer curious......

It seems that a pair of jacky shackles are put on his feet, and he is struggling, and he has lost the power to explore the unknown.

He can only be confined to a corner, enjoying a moment of comfort.

He wasn't that decadent before.

Innocence becomes numb, not a day's cold.

There have been too many twists and turns.

And the most painful blow is often the setback in love.

He wasn't the most pitiful man in the world;

There are not a few men in the world who are inseparable;

But he may be the unluckiest man in the world;

No one has been defeated so often on the road to love like him.

And the reasons for the rejection are the same every time.

If it weren't for the complete opposite of his purpose, he was unexpectedly recognized by the girl as an older brother; It's that the girl says she doesn't want to fall in love; But the saddest thing for him was that a few days later he saw the girl holding the hand of another boy.

Of course, the girl said the most about the beautiful lie: "You are good! I'm sure I'll be able to find a better one in the future. ”

If these reasons for refusal are only said once, it will not disappoint Xiao Nei to death.

But if the same reason, repeated ten times or even more, and at the same time it happens to one person.

It's like the derivation process of a math problem.

A formula can be justified with some immutable conclusions.

This formula is applied to Xiao Nei - no girl likes him.

"Too demanding" could no longer explain the confusion in his heart.

Because most of the girls he pursues are of the ordinary category.

I can only borrow a word that girls often say - "feeling".

Once love meets shadows, it seems that all efforts are in vain.

Appearance, connotation, cultivation, romance...... Even money doesn't matter anymore.

Innate temperament is the first priority.

And this temperament is almost immutable.

Xiao Nei's temperament seems to be inherently unattractive.

Always unintentionally abandoned by girls.

As a result, Xiao Nei formed an almost fatalistic concept - there will be no more love in the future.

Once this concept is formed, he will think that on the road of love, no amount of effort will be in vain.

With this concept, he can only cling to the incomplete.

Xiao Nei is not great, and the love he is obsessed with is tightly combined with the primitive impulse in his heart;

Xiao Nei is introverted, but he is a man with strong blood;

When introversion meets instinctive desire impulses, the result can only be internal injuries.

Especially in this restless summer, even the air is full of the hormones of girls jumping.

What's more, this summer is the last chance.

After that, he will leave the campus forever.

As a result, this kind of hormones unique to girls will all be gathered in one place, which makes him even more addictive and fascinated.

He is extremely envious of those boys who are always surrounded by girls.

Moreover, the boys next to those beautiful girls are not necessarily very handsome.

This made him, who was still quite handsome, puzzled.

I can only begin to doubt the definition of handsome, or shake my belief in beauty.

"Beauty, the reason why it causes pleasure, is precisely because she is good; Kindness is also a kind of beauty. ”

Some of the boys he knew were often dismissive of girls, as if they could be twisted at hand.

Even if it hurts them, it feels like a sign of masculinity.

This is simply a sin in the eyes of Xiao Nei.

He even argued with them as seriously as a child.

He insisted that as long as he was good enough to the girl and pity her like a beautiful jade, he would get a reciprocal return.

But they think that if they are tough enough on girls, they will die for men.

Xiao Nei thinks that girls like white and tall boys, but they say that dark is the only way to be masculine.

This deliberate and protracted debate ended in the defeat of Xiao Nei.

Because it is these people who he considers "sinful" that are always intertwined with female hormones.

And his impulses can only be bluntly self-digested.

This self-digestion is much the most of the time just an illusion.

This fantasy has been with him since his youth, and has helped him through countless gloomy periods.

During that period, he was silently ridiculed by his classmates as a wooden man and an unsound personality.

But he always believed that one day, when a girl fell in love with him, all the blows would disappear.

However, this illusion was completely shattered by the advent of graduation and the still loss of love.

Sometimes, when he is completely trapped by love, he seems to have forgotten where he is and who he is.

While his classmates were busy completing credits and preparing for their papers, he was still drunk and dreaming of the loss of love.

Therefore, when he was suddenly told that he was still one credit short and might not be able to obtain a diploma, he could only work hard, it was tantamount to adding insult to injury.

It's like a withered heart, and then burned by fire, it can still make its last tearing sound.

He could only forcibly lift up his heavy soul, almost always supported himself with willpower, and kept telling himself in his heart: You must get your graduation certificate!

It's an iron belief.

He could not afford to lose all his work.

It's like he can't face his parents who worry about his studies until the end of the day, and he has to face a blow of completely denying their efforts.

In the end, he finally succeeded in making up for the credits with that almost trance-like willpower.

But the feeling of being lost and regained can only give him a temporary relaxation, and the haze of love shrouded in his heart is still with him.

Even so, there is hope that he will transfer the pain.

Therefore, when some companies came to the campus to hold job fairs, he was as serious as a child.

He wore the inexpensive suit that his mother bought for him when he first entered school.

Because in his impression, his mother always said that boys should wear suits in society so that they would not be rude, and others could afford to see them.

Although his classmates laughed at him for being too formal.

He was still serious and nervous, smiling confidently in front of the interviewer.

As a result, the casual boys who laughed at him for being too serious were hired, and he in a suit and leather shoes was unexpectedly excluded from the talent needed by the company.

It felt like the result of his serious love affair.

At that time, he always dressed himself up carefully, and always imagined that girls would be fond of him because of his cleanliness and clarity.

After these twists and turns, Xiao Nei finally felt extremely exhausted physically and mentally.

So there is the opening scene.

"Xiao Nei, I'm back!"

A loud voice came from outside the dormitory, interrupting Xiao Uchi's state.

A boy with flat head and glasses walked in briskly.

"Ah Wei, you're back." Xiao Nei replied warmly.

He almost forgot that he wasn't the only one in the dormitory.

There is also a roommate, Ah Wei.

Because the probationary period has not yet arrived, Ah Wei has to live in the dormitory for a while. (To be continued.) )