Through the analysis of the above cases, I think it is possible to understand the initial cause of the disease - regressive gratification. Pen & Fun & Pavilion www.biquge.info

This brings us to the second stage: the cause of regressive gratification - personality deviation.

In order to develop this argument, another psychological disorder must be brought to fruition - depression.

As mentioned earlier, there is almost no depression that exists alone, and there is no compulsion alone.

Obsessive-compulsive and depressive forces often go hand in hand.

Or the man L in the case above.

In addition to obsessiveness, but there is also a severe depressive mood.

Obsessive-compulsive symptoms: 1. I always want to overthrow myself and make myself crazy for no reason.

2. Fantasizing about attacking others, especially those closest to them.

There is no strict distinction between the two types of compulsion.

Depressive symptoms: misanthropy and feeling that life has no meaning. When he lives in a familiar environment, the depression gets better. Once gone, depression worsens. The feeling uprooted him made him lose his soul.

In the final analysis, this psychological problem stems from his special family relationship:

His mother was sentimental and his father was irritable and neurotic. Occasionally, a hysterical roar erupts. He pitied his mother's sorrow and hated his father's nervousness.

He spent most of his childhood in a discordant relationship with his parents. His happiness comes from a kind of retreating satisfaction—a kind of pleasure of disparity: the cold war of his parents makes him gloomy, and the reconciliation of his parents makes him happy.

The boy's subconscious is unconditionally mother-lover.

Therefore, he thinks that as long as his father is not at home, family discord does not exist, and he can also be happy. The essence is an escapist, morbid pleasure.

Gradually, this pleasure of falling has been ingrained in his heart and cannot be shaken. It didn't make him sick.

This joy is at risk when one day he discovers that his mother is cheating.

Here's the key! You can see how all kinds of contradictions and sufferings evolve and stick together.

If he gets angry with that third party and things get bigger, the father will definitely know. Then his parents may divorce, and the family happiness on which he depends will be gone.

Therefore, he could only suppress his anger and pity himself.

Not only that, but he must remain silent forever, always reminding himself to keep this secret with a strong sense of reason.

Otherwise, with her mother's sentimental personality, she may commit suicide in shame.

With his father's personality, he may go crazy and hurt people.

The key is here again!

If he wants to keep this secret, he must sacrifice part of himself, suppress the true anger in his heart, empathize with his mother's pain, and stop the consequences of his father's seizure.

In this way, the part of himself that he lost is traceable: part of it is stuck with the imaginary consequences of his mother's suicide in shame;

Part of it sticks to the imaginary consequences of Daddy's madness and hurting.

Figuratively speaking, if the self is a wall, then it is he who separates a part of the self and breaks some bricks from the self to block these two consequences. In this way, it is inevitable that these two imaginary consequences will be glued together.

Although it is lost, it is actually a part of the self, so it can perceive both kinds of suffering.

The above situation only led to his sentimentality and tangled, confrontational, and nervous personality, but did not lead to depression and compulsion to the extent of the disease.

Later, he failed in a relationship many times in a row, which led to his depression.

It can be analyzed that he transferred his feelings for his mother to the girl he loved. When a girl leaves her, her mother leaves her.

I don't want to go over this transfer mechanism of "mother's love is transferred to other girls", because it is so important that it cannot be generalized.

This seems normal and the way to go.

But psychologists are different, he attaches far more importance to the love of girls than ordinary people, they even want all girls to like him, and can hardly tolerate even a few girls ignoring him.

His quest for quantity goes far beyond quality.

Once a girl rejects him, whether he has been loved or not, whether the girl who rejected her is his true love or not, he will be extremely low and even depressed.

The cause of this abnormal psychology is extremely secretive. I would like to give a general explanation here, so that when I elaborate on it later, we will lose sight of one and the other, and the beginning and the end will not be connected.

Roughly speaking, it is: the most primordial, the root of all love - love for the mother. In an accident, due to the interference of some external factors (mainly people), this concentrated motherly love was suddenly dispersed; Scattered to those who interfered with his mother's love.

And if these people are men, his love will be scattered and merged into them.

One man loves one woman, and ten men love ten women...... The evolution is that the number of patients who love women has increased dramatically.

In contrast, he exaggerated to ask for as many women to love him.

Corroborating this reasoning is that every time a man asks a girl to love him and appreciate him. Deep down, I actually want to prove my mother's worth.

Because the child's appearance is inherited from the mother.

If a girl belittles his appearance, she is belittling his mother.

This kind of dispersion of love may also be reflected in the later pages.

Now, let's get back to the topic:

The premise for his mother to leave him must be to expose the secret.

Therefore, his depression and misanthropy are actually the imagination of his mother's suicide in shame.

The girl left him, and his lust had nowhere to vent, and he became angry with the girl from love to hate.

However, to be angry with a girl is to be angry with your mother.

He didn't like to be neurotic like his father and didn't want his parents' discord to lead to divorce, so he forcibly suppressed his anger, which led to compulsion later.

But at this time, the compulsion has not yet been fully formed, and a certain incentive is needed to stimulate it.

Because even if the image of his mother is shattered in his heart, he can still maintain it by transferring.

It's like he can transfer the maintenance of his mother's image to other girls;

He can also shift the maintenance of his mother's image to serious study. In other words, he was able to maintain his mother's image by "studying hard".

Where does this begin?

It also depends on when his first compulsion originated.

It turned out that his compulsion to go crazy was due to a failure in a major exam.

It can be said that in his opinion, this exam can determine his future and destiny.

Once the exam is lost, the last barrier to the preservation of the mother's image is broken.

In other words, when the mother's indecent incident is exposed, the father is bound to go crazy about it.

Therefore, his madness and compulsion are the imagination of his father going crazy and hurting people.

Using "serious study" to transfer and maintain the image of the mother is not a far-fetched statement, but a real memory of the patient.

It turned out that at the moment when the image of his mother was broken, he said that the idea of "studying seriously" in his heart increased violently, and he vowed to his father that he would study seriously. You may think that the transfer of love for mothers to girls from the outside world is related to the men who violate their mothers from the outside world. But what does this have to do with the father? Here it is necessary to explain: those men are equivalent to "third parties". Or back to the relationship between "mother, father, and third party".

This complex adhesion can also be seen in a fantasy he had before his illness, paraphrased as follows:

He fantasizes that his mother left him forever because her son was not loved, and he became depressed and sick. He was very sad and pitiful. In this way, everyone will come to pay attention to him and have pity on him. The girl will come to reflect on why she didn't love him.

He also fantasizes that he attacked the girl he once loved and that the police came to arrest him. In this way, a kind college student will become like this, which will surely attract social attention and make the girl reflect on why she did not choose to love him. Even in his fantasies, he imagined that he was not caught by the police, and that it was his mother who appeared to arouse his conscience and give up anger and aggression.

When you are depressed, you don't usually force it.

Because if Mom commits suicide in shame, Dad will definitely not be angry and hurt, but sad.

When compulsive, I am generally not depressed.

Because if Mom is not ashamed, Dad must be more angry, and the urge to go crazy and hurt people is stronger.

Obsessive-compulsive and depressed feelings are different.

Resist when you force it; When I am depressed, I can hardly resist it, and I seem to have completely lost my resistance and fallen into an endless depression.

The reason for this difference.

That's because men are born with a "mother-loving father" complex. Even if you are afraid of your mother's sentimentality and melancholy, you can't resist it, and you can only surrender to this melancholy.

And the fear of his father's irritability is strongly antagonistic.

In a word, his illness has only one simple purpose----- to maintain his mother's image and status.

As Sigmund Freud once mentioned, a woman was forced to stay at the table for a moment before going to bed, thoughtfully; Then I went to bring a glass of water and brought it to the bedroom, but I didn't drink it.

It turned out that she did this only because there was once a servant who made an unforgivable mistake because of the problem of serving water.

The mistake was that the maid, on the wedding night, brought water into her bedroom, saw that the sheets were white, and according to local custom, naturally thought that her husband was incompetent in some way, and publicized it.

In order to maintain the dignity of her husband, the hostess had to subconsciously recreate the scene again and serve the water instead of the maid. He blames the servant's fault entirely on his own carelessness.

It can be seen that behind the "regressive satisfaction" is to over-maintain the loved one.

The object of this maintenance is often the parents; The husband is also just a symbol of the father.

Moreover, the people to be defended are often vulnerable.

The mother that L defends is sentimental and forbearing.

The husband who is defended by the hostess is also cowardly and inferior.

Because of this, they become infected with the dark side of the maintenance object.

As mentioned in the previous examples, if you maintain the shortcomings and darkness of your loved one, you will absorb them and become a part of yourself.

Make yourself inferior and cowardly, dare not be aggressive, and can only "regress and be satisfied".

This is the ---- personality deviation that leads to "regressive gratification".

For boys, it is a deviation from the feminine maternal side.

Of course, this kind of femininity refers to the universal nature that women are born with, almost physiological, and does not conflict with some cases of female toughness.

This process of mental illness caused by over-maintenance of the person on whom the heart is dependent can also be shown more realistically and clearly through "empathy".

This kind of presentation relies on the relationship between the psychiatrist and the patient.

When the psychiatrist peels off the cocoon for the patient and solves the problem, the patient suddenly feels the spring breeze in his heart.

However, don't think that this is the end of the problem.

The patient's good mood is only due to the existence of the psychiatrist's dependence.

Once the psychiatrist is challenged and questioned by the outside world, just as his mother is insulted by outsiders. (It's a kind of empathy)

The patient will then be "like a great enemy", and there will be a so-called "theoretical compulsion" ---- look for all the factors that support the psychologist.

For this reason, he can give up the original happiness in life and constantly entangle himself in the theories taught to him by the psychiatrist and the doubts of the outside world.

If you don't find a psychiatrist to support you, you'll fall into despair and depression.

It should not be difficult to see that the problem is not whether the theory of the psychiatrist is correct, but that he over-maintains the dependence of the psychiatrist. This leads to self-obsessiveness and depression.

If we go a little deeper, we can conclude that the psychiatrist is only a symbol of the patient's mother; External challenges are a symbol of fatherhood.

Excessive maintenance of mothers and resistance to fathers will lead to coercion.

When over-maintenance breaks, it can lead to depression.