Although I yelled and screamed in the hospital, I never let my tears flow out, and after walking out of the hospital, I pretended to be very calm along the way, as if I was not crippled, and I was not a waste.

I also don't want Li Qingshu to feel too guilty, let alone cry in front of others, in fact, I have always endured the tears that burst out of my eyes, and I don't even let him roll in my eyes, maybe I can only cry secretly in a room where there is no one else and is extremely quiet, right?

When I was in the hospital, I still pretended to say that I was a handle, but the so-called man with a handle couldn't bear the situation I had to face after all, and I couldn't imagine what kind of situation it would be if I couldn't stand up in the future. Maybe I'm just unproductive and can't bear the fact that I can't stand up.

Before, I was stupid to think that someone in the TV series was crippled, crying, crazy, and I was ashamed to say that people were really unproductive, but when I really experienced it, I realized that a qiē and a qiē were taken for granted I thought that at this time, curled up on a soft bed, covered with a quilt, I was the most unproductive, man.

I'm sobbing, if I can't stand up, who will take care of my parents? Let them not be happy in their old age, and take care of me every day? Do you want to continue farming even if you are fifty or sixty? I can't imagine, and I can't imagine.

I choked up, if I couldn't stand up, what would Tom do? He already has a mother who abandoned him, does he need a crippled father who can't do anything? Are you ridiculed by your classmates every day when you go to school? I secretly clutched at the blue sheets, choking even harder.

Family affection is like this, so what about love? Am I worthy of the so-called love? I've always taken love very seriously, am I still worthy? I'm just a cripple, I can't even take care of myself, how can I protect others.

Tears continued to flow, across the bitter cheeks, at this time I covered my head and cried in addition to pain is fear, I am in pain, I can't be like a normal person, I am afraid that I can't be a good son, a good father, a good boyfriend or even a good husband.

The quilt and bedding may have become wet long ago, but my pain is hard to get rid of, and I cry like a child, a child who has been frustrated, a child who has not yet grown up.

Before, I thought there was something wrong with my legs, but I didn't expect it to be so strict, so strict that I couldn't stand up at all, and became a cripple, when I knew it, I felt like the sky was falling, and I was glad that my parents didn't know my situation, otherwise the consequences were really unimaginable.

At this time, I'm asking myself if I regret saving Li Qingshu, maybe there is a trace of regret, but I can't die after all, if I don't save her, she will be gone, and now that I'm saved, we're all here, I'm just crippled, crippled, very heavy.

My head was about to explode, my face was completely washed with tears, and I was tired, and I fell into a real deep sleep with painful feelings

When I woke up, it was already dark, and when I opened my eyes and looked at the gray but gloomy ceiling, my fear grew stronger, I was afraid that I was the only one left in the world, and I was afraid that no one would care about me and let me live on the streets, because I was a cripple, a cripple who had nothing to eat and drink.

The room was dark and scary, I could still feel the chill when I was curled up in the quilt, I wanted to turn on the light, I didn't want such darkness, there was only a glimmer of moonlight in the damn sky, it didn't work for me at all, it couldn't erase my fear at all.

It's just that I was lying on the bed and couldn't reach the lamp on the bedside table, so I could only pull the sheets with my hands with difficulty, and my weak body moved forward with difficulty.

But it's only the upper body that hurts, and I hope that the lower body can also bring pain, even if it hurts my heart, I will, but still, I Liang Jiafeng will never be able to get rid of the damn but.

How I wish I had woken up, from dawn to dark, my legs had an intuition, I could stand up, I could stand in front of Li Qingshu with my chest straight, and I could not let all the people who cared about me worry about me.

Hope and hope are just fantasies to me

Tears may still be hanging on my cheeks, and the pain has not passed because of sleep, but my unwilling, unyielding heart beats violently again, and every beating is telling me that I want to stand up.

Such thoughts filled my mind, and I was driven to stand up with my arms and palms, but when my palms were on the ground, and I was about to stand up in one breath with a wild scream, I crawled on the ground again before the sound fell

I gave up, gave up again, crawling on the ground I slammed the ground with my fist, the so-called unwillingness was eroded by fear and pain, such a desperate feeling is really indescribable, if I am always like this, it is better to die, I don't have to be a burden when I die, I don't have to burden others, I don't have to be so painful.

Life is like this, sometimes it is better to live than to lie in a cold coffin, and at this time, I am like a dog, and I am sad.

Sleeping on the bed was full of fear, but after crawling on the ground, not only did the fear not disappear, but it was like the hopelessness of falling into the abyss, I really wanted to crash to death on the wall, but I didn't even have the strength to die, how sad and ridiculous my life was.

And just when the atmosphere of the room became heavier and heavier, more and more depressing and about to suffocate me, the sound of the door opening suddenly sounded, which was so harsh for me who was desperate at this time, the light I wanted to meet finally illuminated the room, but when I met it, I didn't want to be in a room with light, I would rather be silent forever in the dark, suffering pain and suffering.

Crawling on the ground and watching a pair of feet in a pair of minions with big eyes and cute cotton mops coming towards me one by one, maybe my wolf bèi is the most unwilling to let the owner of the feet see, right?

I want to find a crack in the ground to get into, see her feet, I think of the beautiful and difficult dream I once had, I want the day in the future, I can be comparable to her, I can stand tall in front of her, no longer inferior, no longer cowardly, not handsome face appeared with a confident smile, and said to her firmly: "Li Qingshu, I love you, be my girlfriend, I will protect you for the rest of my life, love you, and never separate." ”

But now? I can only look at her feet, not even look up, so how can the level of my dreams come true? Perhaps when my legs were weak, my so-called dreams were shattered, and I could only look at her feet with delusions, and even the qualifications for delusions no longer existed.