When I was 30 years old, I became a fatherless and motherless child.

On the third day after my mother's death, my relatives from my hometown came to attend my mother's funeral, and I had two uncles, who brought their families, sons, daughters-in-law, daughters-in-law, and sons-in-law, as well as some distant relatives whom I didn't know at all, a huge family of twenty or thirty people. My mother has been confused for several years, it turned out that she was just a relative who walked around during the New Year's holidays, and she saved it in the past few years, because my mother lived with me, and they were afraid of inconvenience, in fact, the last few times they met, my mother no longer knew them.

As the only daughter, I couldn't cry, thinking that I was going to see my mother who hadn't seen me for two days, I was so excited that I couldn't cry. The two uncles came to be elders, they discussed the funeral procedures with Brother Wei Min and Jianjun, I sat in a group of female dependents, holding a cloth bag tightly in my arms, in addition to some of my mother's clothes, there was also a bag of broken food stamps stained with my mother's blood, these things are going to go on the road with my mother today, these food stamps that my mother's surname has not been handed over, let them follow my mother, maybe in the mysterious world that my mother is about to go to, I can find the lost time, let my mother fulfill this wish.

Brother Wei Min and Su Jianjun found a makeup artist in advance, and when I saw my mother, the abrasions on my mother's face were covered with foundation, and she looked peaceful, as if she was asleep, she lay quietly in the farewell hall of the funeral home, and said goodbye to everyone who came to salute in turn. Jianjun's parents also came, silently following the farewell crowd.

After the ceremony, my uncle asked me to sew the cloth that wrapped my mother's face with the needle and thread he had brought, which was a job that had to be done by my daughter, so that my mother would not be afraid of seeing bad things on the way to another world.

I held the needle and thread, and I couldn't get my hands down for a long time, this was the last time I and my mom were, and I leaned down to look at my mom's face vigorously, eager to rub this face down and engrave it in my mind.

My aunt next to me kept wiping my tears and nervously told me not to drop tears on my mother's face, otherwise my mother would be uneasy.

I don't have children, and I'm about to get divorced, if my mother is not stupid or stupid, how can she leave me alone, and how can she go with peace of mind? Now she is the only one in the world who is closest to me, and when she is gone, I have nothing.

Uncle urged me to sew quickly, don't delay the time, I sewed stitch by stitch, the last stitch was just sewn, the track to the inside was started, my mother was like a package on the conveyor belt, slowly moving inside, inside is the incineration workshop, my mother is going to turn into a puff of green smoke there.

I jumped up and tried to grab my mother, but my body was hugged tightly by a pair of hands from behind.

I couldn't break free, and I watched my mom enter the other side of a door, and with a click, the door was cut off by a falling iron plate.

"Mom-" I cried out in despair, my body going limp, and I fell on top of the person who was holding me.

"Alright, alright, alright." It was Su Jianjun's voice in his ears.

The cemetery has been chosen, the stone tablet carved by the craftsman will have to wait a few days to be done because of the work, Brother Wei Min drove his taxi to take me and Jianjun to the martyrs' cemetery, and took out my father's ashes stored there and buried them with my mother, when I put the two boxes of ashes in the open tomb and sealed them with stone slabs, my heart that had been confined for several days was suddenly relieved, and I understood what it means to be in the ground, my father and my mother were companions, and I had nothing to worry about.

The relatives left, Brother Wei Min and Xiao Cui also left, Jianjun's parents went back to their hometown directly, Su Jianjun and I sent everyone away together, and it was close to evening.

"You can go back too." I lowered my eyelids and said to him, "I'll look for a job in a few days, and I'll pay you back when I have enough money." "I only know that it cost 18,000 yuan to buy a cemetery, a few thousand yuan in the hospital, and I didn't ask about the cost of the funeral home, and he didn't say.

"Nothing, it's all our money."

“……”

"That'...... If I go back, can you do it alone? ”

"Okay, it's fine."

Su Jianjun hesitated, pushed the motorcycle out of the yard, turned back, and said to me, "I'm leaving." ”

"Hmm."

After Jianjun left, I plugged the courtyard door and returned to my mother's bed, when I made the bed, I found a turn of 100 yuan under the pillow, two or three thousand yuan, which may have been left by Su Jianjun, and my heart was warm and sour. I put the money aside, set the pillow in place, covered my mom's used quilt, and closed my eyes.

The hectic funeral was over, and I could finally think about my thoughts and sorrows, and in my dreams, my mother came as promised.

It was a strange place, it seemed to be a big yard, a lot of people lined up, standing or sitting, my mother and I were among them, my mother was not very happy, she sat on a burden with her face pulled, and the surroundings were very dim, like an early night in winter.

My mom said to me, "You see it's so late, you don't ask when it's time, you won't be able to eat dinner no matter how late it is." ”

I left the line and went to the front, in fact, I didn't know what was in line, but I seemed to know, I walked forward, I didn't dare to go too far away from my mother, I was afraid that my mother would walk around, so I stopped and asked the two people who were talking together and whispered, what time was it?

The faces of the two men were immersed in darkness and they couldn't see their faces, and their ears only heard two words: "Ten o'clock." ”

I asked what time it was, and the two men turned their heads and continued to whisper, ignoring me, as if who knew what time it was?

I turned back to my mother, who was still sitting on the burden and looked up at me: "Asked?" ”

"Asked."

"What time is it?"

"I don't know."

"Didn't you say you asked?"

"I asked what time it was."

"What time is it?"

"Ten o'clock."

"Ten o'clock? It's ten o'clock before dinner? Haven't eaten yet? My mom said, standing up irritably, walking up and down in front of me, "Haven't eaten yet!" ”……

I woke up.

I opened my eyes, and my ears seemed to be listening to my mother's muttering, and I glanced at the wall clock on the wall, and at this glance, I was violently struck by the hands of the clock, which pointed to exactly ten o'clock in the evening.

It is said that the deceased are reluctant to leave and will linger near home, is it true? Perhaps, my mom is watching me out of sight, and maybe with my dad!

I feel a deep sense of guilt for my mother's death, why should I bring her back? Wait until you get the injection, go through the divorce formalities and come back, won't you avoid this catastrophe? When my uncle came, I asked my mother what happened, and I was speechless and knelt in front of my uncle.

"Smack, smack." There was a sound outside.

It was pitch black in the small courtyard, I pricked up my ears and listened for a while, it seemed to be the sound of the courtyard gate, it was so late, would anyone come?

"Xiao Nan, Xiao Nan."

It was Su Jianjun's voice, I got up and turned on the light, and came out to open the door. The lights in the yard were broken and dark, and I was a little unsure, so I asked again, "Who?" ”

"Xiao Nan, I'm Jianjun."

I opened the door. I saw Su Jianjun's silhouette hidden in the darkness. "Why are you back?"

"The motorcycle is broken, just repaired, and I can't walk ......" (To be continued. )