What I didn't expect was that when I got home, the first thing my mother said to me was, "Whose clothes are you wearing?" ”

"Huh? Didn't you send it to me? ”

"When did I send you something?"

"It's clearly written with our address."

It was dark, the lights were on in the house, everyone else was eating, and my mom was interrogating me about what I was doing at school.

"The child's skin has not returned, and the ...... the student falls in love"

"I didn't."

"None? Tell me who gave you the clothes without you! ”

"I don't know who it is, the package was sent, with our address written on it, don't believe it, wait for me to go back and find out if the bag is still there, bring it back to you!"

"Xiao Nan, don't think that if your father is gone, I can't control you, the most important thing for a girl is self-respect!"

"Why don't I have self-respect, I want to know that you didn't send it, and I won't ask for anything."

"Then tell me, the boy in the class is good to you?"

“…… No. ”

"What about the rest of the school?"

"No, I don't even know!"

"Impossible!"

"I just don't!"

"You don't say yes, do you?"

"What do you want me to say without you?"

I suddenly understood why others can be carefree but I can't, home, like a cage, there is no freedom at all, my mother is more like a supreme judge, representing justice, always reasonable, didn't my father bow his head like a sinner at the beginning? Thinking of the original intention of applying for a technical school, and seeing my mother's temper recovered in the past few years, I secretly thought that I was not worth it.

At night, lying in bed and quietly putting that down jacket on his face, he must be the squad leader! The last time I watched a movie, I wore this dress, and I blushed when I thought about it. Where did he get the money? The quality of the clothes is very good, it shouldn't be cheap, his family seems to have parents who are workers, how can they give him so much money? If it's really him, would it be okay to ask him for such expensive clothes?

On the eve of the Spring Festival, the workers at the place where my mother worked took turns off, and my mother and I were cleaning at home, and someone from the commune informed my mother to go to the commune in the afternoon to hold a party member meeting.

The prize for outstanding party members was a sixteen-carat plastic notebook and a black hero brand fountain pen, I filled the pen with ink, found a piece of paper under the lamp, and asked my mother while trying to make it work: "What happened to the commune this year?" is so generous, didn't you just give one thing in the first place? It's pretty good. Give it to me, Mom? ”

"Hmm."

When I was on the first day of junior high school, I went to Guan Da's mother's house to pay New Year's greetings. Last year, Uncle Guan died of a sudden cerebral hemorrhage, and only the eldest mother and Brother Wei Min were at home. Aunt Guan is the same as my mother, with more gray hair and a lot older, in stark contrast, Brother Wei Min has grown up, burly, and has a strong physique, and he is completely like a top man, calculating his age, he is five years older than me, and he should be twenty-two years old. The guards went out to play and were not at home. Aunt Guan took my hand and kept nagging: "It's big, it's a big child, it's so old......"

To be honest, although my mother raised me, I only felt like a mother when I saw Aunt Guan. Her warm and rough hands kept caressing my hands, touching them, and her eyes were moist: "Good sensible boy, you have suffered, so far from home." ”

I couldn't listen to this, and when I heard it, my heart tightened.

"It's good to go to school well, it's time to go to university this year."

I reassured her, "It's fine now." ”

"Alas!"

After coming out of Guan Da's mother's house, I went home directly, and none of my original classmates wanted to see me, so I had no contact for a long time. When I got home, I saw four or five men and women sitting in the house, all about the same age as my mother, probably my mother and my father's old friends, after calling them one by one, I went back to my room, found a book and flipped through it casually, the door was open, and the sound of the outhouse was clearly heard. It sounds like I understand that the person who paid the 300 yuan party fee was none other than my mother. It seems that it has also been published in the newspaper, and an old man who looks like a retired cadre still sighs, except for these old comrades, how can anyone have this consciousness!

Three hundred! I silently weighed in my heart, eighteen yuan and five cents are enough for me to eat for a month, and the tuition fee for high school is only a dozen yuan a year, how much is two years of high school? It's not enough, you have to read more than half of it, how much do the piles of eggplants that are eaten count? How much is it to dress up and be humiliated by the shame of your classmates? I looked coldly at the person who was busy serving tea and pouring water, this person who had been in the scenery but was forgotten in the corner, probably not willing to be lonely, but using this method to win the halo is really contemptible.

I don't want to say a word to her, I don't want to quarrel with her, she's always right. Whatever she asked me to do, I did it silently, just day by day in my heart, silently counting the days of returning to school, every day was so long, I couldn't grow too long.

Finally got up to the day of leaving, my mother also changed shifts with others, to send me, I was too lazy to take care of her, I just wanted to leave this house quickly, everything was going well, she packed me with some food, stuffed it into my bag, and I took it obediently. What lit the last straw was that she took out a few pieces of ten yuan and asked me to put them in the pocket of my padded jacket: "This is sixty yuan, go back and ask who sent you the clothes, and pay back the money quickly." ”

"No, you don't."

"Girls can't ask for other people's things, return them!"

"Say no!"

"It's back! There is money in the family. ”

"If you have money, you can keep it and pay the party dues!"

My mom froze there, and after a while, my mom said slowly, "There are some things you don't know, I'll tell you later." ”

"Don't tell me! You are so rich, why didn't you say it earlier, why didn't you say it when I went to technical school? Yes? You have the money to pay the party dues to be in the limelight, and you don't have the money to let me go to high school? ”

"It's your own idea to go to a technical school, what does it have to do with having money or not? Why don't we say I don't have the money to let you go to school? ”

"Didn't you say that you asked me to go to a textile factory as a child laborer, and I was a capable mother?"

"Is that for money? Your father has worked in the Public Security Bureau all his life, isn't the person who offends afraid that the disaster will happen to you? ”

"No one else has harmed me, it is you who have harmed me!"

My mother breathed a sigh of relief, and her tone softened first: "Don't talk about the previous ones, you return the money for the clothes to others first." ”

"Don't pay it back! If there is another one to send in the future, I will still want it! Don't you buy it for me, and don't you let others buy it for me? You make me dress like a ghost all day long, do you know how people laugh at me? ”

"Do you still want to be shameless?"

"I don't want it, if I want face, how can you have the money to be in the limelight!"

Syllable! My mom slapped me in the face, it hurt so badly that I didn't know how much I tried.

I covered my face, glared at her, and said word by word: "You, listen, from today onwards, I have nothing to do with you if I die outside!" ”

I lifted the bag so hard that it spilled all over the floor.

Along the way, I tucked my head into my collar, looked out the window at the familiar street, and secretly screamed: never come back!