I was riding a cross-bucket motorcycle, the bicycle was placed in the bucket, the handlebar was supported outside like a crooked machine gun, and when I was waiting for a red light, a three-wheeled one came up from behind, pulled the hand brake and stopped next to me, looked at me and said: "Brother, turn around at the intersection in front, and you won't let the car run after entering the 3rd ring." ”

I said, "I haven't heard of it, isn't there still a production span now?" ”

The tricycle master shook his head and said: "None of the three wheels in the 3rd ring can run, and besides, your car should be scrapped - to commemorate the 10th anniversary of the victory of the Anti-Japanese War?" He looked at the inscription on my motorcycle and said in surprise, "You made this in 55?" ”

I also found out that the tricycle master kindly reminded me: "If you want to avoid a detour, don't you have a bicycle?" Tie a rope, take a bicycle and pull the motorcycle, and you'll be fine. ”

I said, "No one cares about 5 wheels?" ”

The master said: "How rare, if you want to drive 15 traffic policemen, you have to salute you." ”

I thanked the master but didn't listen to him, anyway, the car didn't have a license plate.

I parked the car at the corner of the street, then moved off the bicycle and pushed it in, saw the mahjong parlor open, went in to see Uncle Zhao and Liu Bang at a table, I gave him the car key, Liu Bang followed me out of the door, gloating and laughing, I asked him: "How much money did you win?" ”

"I don't want to win their money today, scatter some rice, or no one will play with me in the future."

I said, "What are you laughing at?" ”

Liu Bang smiled evilly: "You're done." With that, he twisted his ass and ran in.

I entered the pawnshop in confusion, and saw that Master Li was concentrating on playing with the computer, I quietly walked behind her, and was sweating, she opened my D drive, and was looking at the swimsuit beauties inside. I said behind her, "Is it pretty?" She snorted, hurriedly closed the page, and when she saw that it was me, she blushed and asked, "Why are there still my photos?" ”

This time it was my turn to feel uncomfortable, Master Li bit his lip lightly and said, "You are showing it to others...... I thought she would say "I'll die to show you" or something, who knew what she said was "...... I'll take a few good pictures of you. My eyes became thinner and longer, and a smile hung on the corner of my mouth, and Master Li suddenly ran upstairs briskly, giggling and saying, "Cousin, you're done." ”

I was even more puzzled, followed upstairs, and saw Jing Ersil standing at the top of the stairs, he saw me, didn't say anything, and smiled at me, this kind of person with a missing head is smiling at you, that scene is very weird, I began to feel the atmosphere terrible, I wanted to find a kind person to ask, but I didn't expect Qin Shi Huang to shout at me while playing a game: "Qiangzi, you are finished." ”

When I pinned my last hope on Xiang Yu on the sofa, he spread out his two big hands at me and shook his head helplessly. I sat next to him flatteringly and said, "Brother Yu, do you still like vans?" Xiang Yu's eyes lit up, and I asked him in a low voice, "What's wrong?" ”

Xiang Yu said bitterly: "You really shouldn't forget what it is today." ”

"Huh? What's going on today? I scratched my head and said inexplicably.

At this time, Baozi came back, carrying a big cake in his hand, went upstairs and put down the cake, and held the stairs to change shoes, I hurriedly ran up, Baozi glanced at me and said, "Are you back?" ”

It's still my steamed bun, I cursed me as soon as I met, and the steamed bun muttered dissatisfiedly while changing shoes: "Grandma's, today's old lady has a birthday, and the old lady has to buy the cake herself......" I didn't care and said: "Oh, you have a good life, you tell me what is today's day first?" "Then I knew I was wrong, deeply wrong......

Baozi gently put a hand on the back of my head, and then pushed hard against the wall, and with a bang, my head popped up, and Baozi said viciously: "Explain to my mother honestly, where did you go last night?" ”

My little brother Qiang is not easy to get along, I put my arm on her nose: "You smell and you smell." ”

Baozi sniffed and looked at me with a frown, and I said proudly, "Rancid, right?" You say I'm like a skunk, where can I go? Yesterday I helped a buddy move. ”

"Moving at two o'clock in the middle of the night?"

“…… yes, I won the lottery, and I had to move secretly. ”

"How much money did you win?"

"5 pieces!"

Baozi knew that I was laughing with her, but he didn't suspect that I was fooling around, and glanced at me with his eyes: "Virtue!" ”

I put my arms around her and whispered in her ear, "If you still don't believe me, let's go to the back room and see how much your man can ship." ”

Seeing that the whole family was spying on our moves, Baozi pushed me away unnaturally, a little unable to say to himself: "Dog thing." I smiled evilly and tried to tease her, but when I saw Liu Bang walking upstairs, he said dissatisfiedly: "Bad luck." When asked him what was wrong, he said: "I didn't even lose 5 yuan in the afternoon, and now no one is willing to sit at a table with me except Lao Zhao." ”

Baozi said, "Everyone is called out to eat cake." ”

Considering the large number of people, Baozi bought a cake as big as the lid of a well, and a group of us surrounded it in a daze: what should we cut? The plastic sheet knife in the box is simply an ornament, use a kitchen knife to cut it, not only is it not good-looking, but the cake is the same as a pine egg, everything runs away with the knife.

The second fool suddenly said in a daze: "My knife should be fine." Then he drew the thickness of the cake and asked Qin Shi Huang, "Is my knife so long?" Qin Shi Huang distanced himself from him, measured it according to the scene of the year, touched his chin and said, "Almost." ”

I took out the knife from the toolbox and washed it several times, this knife is said to be highly poisonous, but I don't believe in that, the poison more than 2000 years ago is bluffing, you see those romance legends, there are so many people who are poisoned, but it is really because of this one that there is no one.

Baozi picked up the knife and cut the cake into seven horizontal and eight vertical, and when she returned the knife to Jing Ke, Jing Ke said, "You can play with it, I want to use it and ask you again." "Scared the fat man to win.

Liu Bang pointed to the largest piece and said, "I want this." ”

Xiang Yu didn't know why he finally broke out, he lifted Liu Bang to the sky, and said angrily: "Do you have such a big appetite? "There has always been an irreconcilable contradiction between these two people, no one looks down on anyone, Xiang Yu probably saw me and Baozi living together crookedly and reminded him of his sadness, plus the world was also robbed by Liu Bang back then, and he was depressed to the extreme, and these politicians pay a lot of attention to dividing things, you dare to ask for the biggest piece, you deserve to be mentioned to the sky.

Baozi thought they were joking, so he didn't care about them at all, and after handing out the cake, he said: "Today I am born, I am 26 years old, and I am very happy to have so many people celebrate me. ”

Master Li took a sip of the cake and said with a smile: "Congratulations to my sister on her 26th birthday." ”

Bao Ziqi said: "Xiao Nan, why don't you call me cousin-in-law?" ”

Master Li said slyly: "Because I just want to remind my cousin that it's time to officially marry you." Qin Shi Huang said: "Just silk (yes) drops, a 26-year-old woman, should she have gone out a long time ago." Baozi first laughed, and then suddenly touched his face and said, "Do you think I'm old......

Master Li suddenly said to me, "Cousin, what about the gift you gave to your sister?" ”

I was stunned, even the second fool also gave a bun a knife, what do you want to be a boyfriend is too unreasonable, Liu Bang said on the roof in a timely manner: "Although I am not prepared, I have the most heartfelt blessings for you......"

Damn, steal my lines.

I was embarrassed, and Master Li dragged me and complained, "Why are you so stupid, propose to my sister." Qin Shi Huang nodded and smiled: "Hungry can be done." "This is even if Emperor Chrysostom Yuyan gave him a big wedding.

Everyone was looking at me, Liu Bang shouted: "Qiangzi, stick to your own ideas......" was pinched by Xiang Yu and was silent, Xiang Yu said loudly: "Xiaoqiang, you should respond!" ”……

As soon as I saw that it was today, I simply said to Baozi: "If you don't think I have a house, a car, or a deposit, and I'm a bastard - Baozi, you can marry me." ”

Master Li was stunned for a while, and then took the lead in applauding, and Baozi said a little shyly in the applause of everyone: "This matter...... I'll have to ask my dad first. ”

As I said, the old accountant already knew about us, and he was just waiting for me to get engaged.

This is the end of the matter, and it is settled.

I suddenly felt a heavy weight on my shoulders: there was responsibility, obligation, and Liu Bang - Xiang Yu threw him on my shoulder.

Master Li asked me, "Cousin, do you have a sword at home?" ”

I was taken aback: "What? Your cousin and I are married, but we are not a blood alliance. ”

"I don't have any gifts for you, so let's give everyone a sword dance to cheer up."

Where am I going to get her a sword? A few years ago, there was still a piece of knife.

Jing Ke's head is particularly bright today, he ran into the toilet with a cigarette, holding a leather bag, fortunately, this skin bag has not been used, and it is still in a plastic bag.

Master Li took the leather bag and first came to an immortal to guide the way, and after showing his posture, he danced and sang: "In the past, there was a beautiful woman Gongsun's family, a sword dance moved in all directions, and the audience was depressed like a mountain...... "Master Li has a graceful figure and sharp movements, mainly because of the eyes, sometimes sharp and sometimes gentle, and he dances with a wooden stick is also very good-looking, and it would be better if there was no leather bowl on the head of the stick......

For dinner, because we all ate a stomach of cakes, so we only fried a few side dishes and drank a little wine, I looked at the sky outside, and suddenly became interested, and said to Baozi: "Go, I'll take you for a ride." ”

When Baozi saw my cross-bucket motorcycle, she immediately became stupid, and she asked me, "You said that you helped people move yesterday, so you couldn't have helped the museum move, right?" ”

I picked her up and threw her into the bucket, stepped on the motorcycle, and ran to the bridge where we were, and the bun laughed like crazy, and we seemed to have reached the age of being very stupid and naïve in the process of watching the sunset.

When the back of me and Baozi and the sunset were forming an oil painting, I suddenly received a text message, I took out Lan Wow's mobile phone to check, and Baozi said in disgust: "I said can you smoke less cigarettes and change your mobile phone, the remote control is better than your thing." ”

I ignored her, and at first glance, it was an unfamiliar number, and the content of the text message was: Qiangzi, I forgot to tell you, you don't work for heaven in vain, and you will get a salary in a month, specifically to give you a small benefit, to help you open a heavenly eye or something, but it is not possible, a few days in the morning and a few days in the evening - you know who I am, right?

Liu Lao Liu! Who else but him?

I'll reply right away: This is your phone number? Can you get me some gold first?

Liu Lao Liu: Don't count on it, I don't know much, at most I can turn earwax into copper, this is what I sent you through the phone of a hexagram friend - don't reply, I'm leaving.

I called the phone, and a man over there sulked and said, "Who's early?" ”

I said, "Where are you?" ”

"Iron Collar, Geha?"

Liu Laoliu fled to the northeast. After hanging up the phone, I was quite excited, and now it seems that it is almost time, and I don't know what benefits Heavenly Court will give me, I will have a fucking ability soon!

At this moment, I suddenly saw two black shadows floating towards me quickly, my body and legs did not move, I was terrified, it seemed that my eyes had been opened, and then I looked closely that it was not - the two of them were skateboarding.

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