This night, Xiang Yu couldn't sleep at night, sometimes I woke up and turned over to see him staring at the roof with burning eyes, back and forth several times, I couldn't help but say to him: "Brother Yu, go to sleep, how can I see my sister-in-law tomorrow with bloodshot eyes?" Then he closed his eyes. But I know he wasn't asleep.

Xiang Yu, the overlord of the ages, will actually be like a hairy boy for a woman, if he has to face a big war tomorrow, he will definitely sleep very well, just like if I go to the battlefield tomorrow, I will definitely not be able to sleep at night......

As soon as the buns left the next day, the members of the "Pickle Girl" group gathered from all corners, Xiang Yu's eyes were really bloodshot, I asked him to wrap two mung bean popsicles in a towel, and then I pinned the pencil to my ear, unfolded the waste newspaper, and waited majestically to give orders. His subordinates include: the first emperor wins the fat man, who is responsible for ingesting intelligence, which helps to understand Zhang Bing's activities more comprehensively, and when necessary, he must ask Liangshan heroes or others for help, and the photos are first-hand information; The first assassin, Jing Ersil, is responsible for the logistics of the intelligence officer to win the fat man, including buying water when he is thirsty, buying food when he is hungry, etc.; The first place is Li Shishi, she has a new task today, that is, to enter the enemy's deep zone, first of all, she has to climb the relationship with Zhang Bing, and then become a good friend who talks about everything, and finally Xiang Yu appears as his cousin, and will be accompanied by Li Shishi to complete their first date.

The party Xiang Yu, the main task: pickling girls. I saw him put a popsicle over his eyes, and several times he stopped talking, and I could tell that he was nervous.

I took a popsicle, tore open the wrapper and gnawed on it, and said, "Brother Yu, who are you?" ”

Xiang Yu said inexplicably: "Xiang Yu." ”

I shook my head and said: "Xiang Yu is just your code name, your real identity is the owner of a chain soup dumpling shop, you can earn 100,000 yuan a month, and you can park 10 yuan at a time without change." ”

Master Li explained to him: "The owner of the steamed bun shop is easy to please girls, and this kind of man with a small career is more reliable. Master Li said to me again, "Do you want to make up another history of failed marriages?" ”

I thought for a while and said: "Forget about the marriage history, I am dedicated to starting a business, and it has been delayed to this day." ”

As we were talking, Liu Bang stumbled upstairs and sat down on the sofa, not even having the strength to speak.

I said, "Bangzi, where's the car?" ”

Liu Bang threw the car keys on the table, snatched the popsicle in Xiang Yu's hand and gnawed on it, and took two bites before he said weakly: "I'm tired to death." ”

I looked downstairs and saw Black Widow beckoning a cab to leave, a Hyundai parked next to her.

I rubbed my hands excitedly and said, "Now that the car is also available, Brother Yu, you really have to thank Bangzi this time, he will not hesitate to die for you-Bangzi, come back at night and buy you two big waist supplements." ”

Liu Bang said with emotion: "It's still the strong son who knows how to hurt people." ”

Xiang Yu patted Liu Bang's shoulder unnaturally and said, "Thank you." ”

Liu Bang shook his head and said: "I know you still hate me, in fact, I was already very satisfied after sitting in half of the country, it was Zhang Liang's kid who gave me nonsense ideas that only happened later, but I won't say any of this, I'll give you a piece of advice, you are a good person, but you can't pull your face down at a critical time, what do you rely on to pick up girls?" Money and cheek, let me ask you, give you another chance, will you kill me at the Hongmen banquet? ”

Xiang Yu said slowly: "I won't kill you, with that lesson, I will definitely be able to lead troops to defeat you openly." ”

Liu Bang patted his thigh and said, "Look, do you still want to pick up girls like you?" I always feel that I am a hero, I am omnipotent, I have myself in a bind, there are many things you can't do, you can't let go of your hands and feet, you can't do anything! Liu Bang excitedly took a bite of the popsicle, blew coldly, and said, "When I was going to change me, how many of you were at the Hongmen banquet would have died a long time ago, what kind of benevolence, righteousness and morality, all it, Lao Tzu won the world and then said, Xiaoji (Xiang Yu's words), I was a loser to you back then, but I am only sorry for you, the people can say that I am good, negative individuals and negative people, this is a simple multiple-choice question, but unfortunately you always choose the wrong one." ”

I hurriedly said: "Where is this, Bangzi, you and Cao Ying should have a common language, he just lost a few people and won the world." ”

Liu Bang asked, "Cao Ying?" Who did he lose? ”

Master Li hurriedly interrupted and said, "Let's talk about Brother Xiang today. ”

Liu Bang forgot about Cao Ying, and said: "What I mean is that you can't be too thin-skinned, anyway, you don't treat me as a friend, you can say whatever I want, now you are chasing her, and the little crooked door should be used, yesterday I learned a new word, called 'raw rice cooked rice'......"

I said, "Nowadays, girls don't talk about this for a long time, and basically they are cooked rice, and raw rice is very difficult to find - of course, eighty percent of my sister-in-law is raw rice." ”

Qin Shi Huang tinkered with the camera and said: "Bao Zaishe (don't say it again) nonsense, can't you go?" ”

Look, the founding emperor still has the spirit of hard work and courage.

I said, "Let's go, Brother Yu, you open the modern era, and the others will follow me to the bread, and the pickle girl operation will officially begin." ”

Downstairs, Xiang Yu said dissatisfiedly: "Why don't you let me drive bread, this car is so small." ”

I said depressedly: "The car is a sign of a man's success, if you rode a pig into the Taishou Mansion, even if you were brave enough to take a fancy to you?" He barely complied.

Passing by the mobile phone market, I first bought a bunch of mobile phones, and then bought more than a dozen cards at the door, and the card seller was shocked and said: "Now those who apply for certificates have their own fleet?" ”

Master Li is naturally a learner, I entered the number of the winning fat man on my mobile phone, and told him which key to press as soon as it rang, anyway, he didn't need to call for the time being. I entered Zhang Bing's phone into Xiang Yu's mobile phone and said to Liu Bang: "You can sit next to him for a while, teach him how to use it, and send text messages - fasten your seat belt." ”

Liu Bang took out a small dictionary and said while walking with Xiang Yu to the car: "This is a little complicated, first you have to learn simplified characters, then learn to look up the dictionary, and finally learn to compare the input method ......."

I sweated and hurriedly shouted: "Bangzi, you let Brother Yu drive well first, and then teach later." "I really didn't expect them to be so complicated in texting, it seems that behind Liu Bang's great success, there is a lot of sweat and hard work, and of course, his natural high IQ.

To be honest, if I were a woman, I would definitely like Liu Bang more than Xiang Yu, unless it was under the special circumstances of the Eight-Nation Alliance's entry into Yanjing, or would I get Zhang Bing to go to Afghanistan? In this way, Xiang Yu has a chance to save the beauty heroically.

When we arrived at the C gate, I began to assign tasks, I put my hand on Li Shixiang's shoulder, and said solemnly: "Cousin, it's mainly up to you today, whether you fought beautifully in this first battle is directly related to Brother Yu's happiness, you must become best friends with Zhang Bing, even if she rejects you, try to get as much useful information as possible." ”

Xiang Yu looked at Master Li extremely nervously, and after a long time, he said, "Please!" ”

Master Li's eyes flowed, and he smiled coquettishly: "Brother Xiang, if this matter becomes something, what will you thank me?" ”

I pushed her away and said, "Just kidding, don't you see that the sweat on your big brother Xiang's head can raise goldfish?" ”

I pulled Qin Shi Huang: "Brother Win, follow the teacher, Zhang Bing will give you a gesture when she appears, the rest is your business, you have to shoot as much as possible, and there is also a key point that all the boys who greet Zhang Bing should not be less, especially she and have laughed." I patted Jing Ke: "Protect Brother Ying, he still owes you 300 yuan and hasn't paid it back." ”

In the end, I put both hands on Xiang Yu's shoulders, looked into his eyes and said, "Brother Yu, we horse pawns will build bridges and pave the way for you, and in the end, it's up to you, you must take Zhang Bing down with a knife." ”

Liu Bang said: "Your metaphor is not good, he will always be the first to fight, I have to admire him, I want to be like him, I'm afraid I have already come to you." ”

I said to Xiang Yu: "If it goes well in a while, the master will lure Zhang Bing out, and you are the cousin of the master, so you happened to meet your cousin, so you had a meal together, since your cousin is still following the friend you just met, of course it is invited by the way - can you understand what I said?" ”

Xiang Yumu nodded. I put a thick pile of money and a few cards in front of him into a wallet, and said: "These are all prepared for you by my brother, if you go to a place like Caesar's Western food, remember to swipe your card, if you go to eat hot pot, you will pay cash, if Zhang Bing chooses a place, of course it is the best, but girls will not take the initiative to say where to go at this time, find a casual place for the first meal, don't be too restrained......" I was also sweating as I spoke.

Xiang Yu said movingly: "Xiaoqiang, you will be my brother in the future." ”

Liu Bang interjected and said, "Your brother is Xiang Zhuang." ”

I pulled Liu Bang again and said, "Bangzi, you enlighten Brother Yu and let him relax." ”

Liu Bang said to Xiang Yu: "Why don't you beat me." ”

I left them in the Hyundai car, turned around and walked just two steps before coming back, and said to Xiang Yu: "You'd better buy a bouquet of flowers and hide it in the car, and I will remind you to give it to her at the right time." ”

"What flowers to buy?"

"The first time I saw it, except for roses, you ask the people in the flower shop, they understand, and they say it's for women."

After arranging all this, I almost collapsed, to be honest, just take out this team, even if you want to kill a person, you don't have to be so tired. I sat down in a corner in the small square opposite Zhang Bing's dormitory and began to learn about the situation of people from all walks of life.

Master Li had already found out from Wang Jing that Zhang Bing would have a class, and she was now waiting in front of the teaching building, thinking of a way to get close to Zhang Bing. Qin Shi Huang and Jing Ke were not far from her.

At this time, I saw Zhang Bing walking out of the dormitory building alone, and I immediately called Master Li: "Zhang Bing has appeared, Zhang Bing has appeared, please be ready to wait for the rabbit." ”

Master Li was also nervous by my tone: "Received, received." Then he burst out laughing and said, "What are you doing?" ”

I said, "Have you figured out a way to get close to her?" ”

Master Li said: "I'm thinking, I'm not professional in confusing girls." ”

is also said, Song Qing may be better than her to do this, but I am afraid that Xiang Yu will not do it, I think the golden candidates for this matter are Gao Lishi, Wei Zhongxian or something, by the way, why haven't I even come to a eunuch until now? But I quickly figured it out: Which eunuch do you say is still reluctant to give up on this identity? Of course, he was reincarnated as soon as he hung up.

I said, "Hurry up and talk to her about 'Nun Yubei Wang Falcon!'" ’”

"I'm not going to tell you when she's coming......"

I immediately called the fat man: "Are you ready?" ”

"Okay."

"Well, even the main building of this school will be photographed in a while, maybe it will be useful."

Qin Shi Huang said: "You (are) trying to occupy your mouth (this) pinch? ”

……

Ten minutes later, I called Master Li again, she had turned off the phone, it seems that the docking is smooth, why don't you answer the phone? But if Zhang Bing was in class, how did Master Li approach her?

I couldn't figure it out, so I had to call Qin Shi Huang again, this time it took a long time for him to answer, and he spoke with an echo, it should be in the corridor, I asked him how he was doing, and he said: "A group of girls are dancing and pinching." ”

"Where's the teacher?"

"Dancing with them."

No wonder, dancing, this is in the hands of Master Li, a person who can dance with a leather pouch and dance with a sword dance effect, Zhang Bing and their dance teacher are afraid that they are not a child, but in what capacity did she enter? If I hadn't been exposed in front of Zhang Bing and couldn't show up, I really wanted to find out.

After a long wait, Master Li suddenly called over, and she hurriedly said to me: "Cousin, I called you under the pretext of going to the bathroom, and I have officially met Zhang Bing, I proposed to let her take me to visit her campus, and she agreed to have dinner with me at noon, you let Brother Xiang and them all prepare at the school gate, and we should see him as soon as we go out in a while." ”

After hanging up the phone, I immediately asked Xiang Yu about the situation, Liu Bang said that his "word therapy" had already worked, and Xiang Yu was now like a stagnant water and looked at death as home. I asked them if they had bought it, and Liu Bang said that Xiang Yu had already bought it.

Things are going very well, take this opportunity to let Qin Shi Huang give full play to his role, in the middle of the campus to dig out as many Xiang Yu's rivals as possible, anyone who accosted Zhang Bing, all photographed, Zhang Bing and laughed, take two, if you talk and laugh with Zhang Bing and stay for a certain time, are the focus of the target.

I was distracted for a while, and received a harassing phone call from Master Li, which indicated that they were almost at the school gate.

I trotted towards the door, while calling Xiang Yu, I said with a solemn expression: "Brother Yu, enter the first-level combat readiness, sister-in-law will appear immediately, remember not to be nervous, you met your cousin by chance and met your sister-in-law by the way, to understate it, you have to lift weights ......lightly."

Xiang Yu suddenly said irrepressibly in a trill: "What should I say to her in the first sentence?" ”

“…… Just say 'hello'. ”

"Hello...... What about the second sentence? Xiang Yu said anxiously.

“…… Introduce yourself, just say that you are Wang Yuannan's cousin. ”

"Who is Wang Yuannan?"

“…… Wang Yuannan is a teacher, Brother Yu, didn't we talk about the details a long time ago? ”

"What about the third sentence, what should I say in the third sentence?"

"Holy! Is it you or am I picking up girls? ”

"I'm ...... What about the fourth sentence, the fourth sentence? ”

I'm completely speechless, Xiang Yu, Xiang Yu, pickled girls are so inferior.

At this time, I saw that Master Li and Zhang Bing had already walked to the school gate, and they could already look at the car parked across the road.

I yelled at the phone, "Brother Yu, now!" Come out and get out of the car! ”

But no matter how I shouted, the Hyundai car on the opposite side just didn't move, and Master Li seemed to be puzzled, but she stood quietly at the door and pointed, pretending to discuss something with Zhang Bing to delay time.

I shouted so loudly that Xiang Yu just didn't speak or make a sound, and he didn't get out of the car.

I hung up the phone, called Liu Bang's, and shouted, "Bangzi, what's going on?" ”

Liu Bang said: "If he doesn't go out, what can I do?" ”

"Push him out!"

Liu Bang: "You try!" ”

I sighed: "It's not enough to make a plan!" ”

The matter has come to this, the general trend has gone, I sent a text message to Master Li and asked her to go to dinner with Zhang Bing by herself, after all, she has already inserted this move.

I took Qin Shi Huang and Jing Ke to Xiang Yu and asked him, "What's the matter with you?" Filming "The Assembly", let's die in front, but you slipped away quietly. ”

Xiang Yu buried his head and was silent, and after a long time he said weakly, "I'm sorry." ”

I can't talk about him anymore like this, and when I looked at the back seat of the car, there was a big bouquet of flowers, I picked it up and sniffed it, and said, "You bought it?" ”

"Hmm." Xiang Yu snorted lightly.

"Hey, why does this flower look so familiar--carnation?! This is for my mother, how did you tell the florist owner? ”

Xiang Yu still buried his head and said, "I told him to give it to my most beloved woman, and I told him not to have roses." He got me this. ”

I said, "Your language is quite poetic, and you are the most beloved woman, and if you say you don't want roses, he will definitely think that you are for your mother." ”

Xiang Yu said, "Throw it away." ”

I dodged his hand, rolled my eyes and said, "This can be given to Baozi's mother." ”

I saw that because Xiang Yu escaped from the battle, my morale was low now, so I raised my arms and shouted: "Brothers, follow my brother to Baozi's house in the afternoon to propose marriage!" ”

Sure enough, they all came to their senses and asked, "Really?" ”

I looked up to the sky and smiled: "Let you see that I am a picky girl!" ”！

(To be continued)