"Get a cigarette!" The old liar stretched out his right hand, made a gesture with a cigarette, and smacked at me.

I shook my head and said, "No, I'm still a college student, and the student code says that students can't smoke!" ”

"Who are you fooling? In the middle of the right pocket of the T-shirt inside the hospital gown, there are two 'Yellow Crane Tower 1916', take them out quickly, how can the children be so stingy! The old liar glared and was very upset.

These two cigarettes were stuffed to me by Luo Yongqing when they came last time, more than 100 yuan a pack, there are only two left, I am reluctant to smoke them, and I don't dare to smoke them, so I can only hide them secretly.

The little nurse hated smoking, and the last time she went to the bathroom to smoke a cigarette at the window, she smelled it, and educated me for two hours, the theme of which was "Men who live with themselves are never allowed to have the vice of smoking", and she has deduced that her son is deformed, and her grandson is also deformed, and she has thrown away all my strategic reserves.

I want to say that I don't dare to say, is your son deformed and can find a wife? The Family Planning Commission will not give birth permits!

Under the supervision and constant urging of the old liar, I reluctantly took out two wrinkled straw-like "Yellow Crane Tower 1916" from the mezzanine in my pocket, and said in my heart that I should give incense to the gods. Before I could hand it over, the old liar snatched it all and didn't leave any of it for me.

"Keep me one!" I hurriedly shouted.

"What to stay? The hospital doesn't allow smoking! The old liar didn't take out the lighter, rubbed his two fingers on the cigarette butt, the cigarette was on, he took a deep puff, and looked at the old cigarette gun that had been broken, "The taste is good, I can't see this 'future fruit', 'past causes' and 'present responses', I can still deduce a few points!" ”

"So you can only deduce that I have a cigarette in my pocket?" I said indignantly.

The old liar's old face was slightly red like tree bark, and he quickly spit out a puff of smoke to cover it, and said proudly in the smoke: "Your name is **, you are 19 years old this year, a student at Hanjiang University in this city, and you are still a boy, right?" ”

I was a little surprised, the other information was found in the hospital medical records, and it was really difficult to guess the body of this boy. I immediately wanted to call the third and fourth children, and the serious medical problem "whether to jerk off or not" that we had been arguing about in the dormitory for nearly a year finally had an authoritative answer, and the answer was still from the gods. According to the old liar, I am still a child, so hitting the plane is not broken, this is what the gods said.

But I immediately raised my vigilance again, this old liar is probably thinking about something, people are old and fine, this old liar has lived for more than 2,000 years, and he farts more than I exhale, I can't fall into his way!

"After chaos opens the sky, everything in the world has five elements. But eight hundred years ago, a treasure was lost in the Heavenly Realm! The old liar spat out a smoke ring, waiting for me to show a surprised expression, but when he saw my calm appearance, he was a little disappointed, like a long-tongued woman full of gossip spirit, full of excitement and said to her best friend, "The little daughter-in-law next door is pregnant with the child of the old king next door of her family", but the best friend didn't care at all.

Actually, what's so surprising about this? It's not a day or two that they have been thieves in the fairy circle, Sun Monkey stole the Pan Tao Immortal Pill, Sanshou Shenjiao stole the Dragon Ball, Agarwood and his mother Yao Ji stole the Baolian lamp, the White Lady stole the Ganoderma lucidum grass, Dayu and his father Kun stole the rest of the soil, the Seven Fairies stole Dong Yong, and the Weaver Girl stole the Cowherd...... There are many thieves in the immortals, and there are many treasures in the heavenly realm, what is the loss of two pieces?

"When Pangu opened the world, he left a skull after his success and death, called Tianyan Plate, and the plate gave birth to colorful mist and turned into the treasure of the five elements, and the pendant hanging on your neck was the treasure of the water line 'Bi Xi Jue'!" The old liar's gaze was staring straight at the droplet amulet around my neck.

I hurriedly reached out to protect the water drop amulet, and said in a heavy tone: "This is mine, mine!" ”

The old liar smiled inscrutable and said, "It's yours, and no one can rob it!" ”

"It's mine for you to rob!" I'm secretly ready, if this old liar dares to rob it, I will first turn my right arm into a crystal machete, sample, I can't kill you!

"I can't imagine that 'Bi Xijue' has been in the people for 800 years, and it is actually recognized in your hands, and no one can snatch it away!" The old liar shook his head and said with emotion, "You happened by chance to drip blood into Jue with the body of a good boy of the ninth world, and from then on, this 'Bixi Jue' will become your natal magic weapon!" ”

I didn't fully understand it, but listening to the meaning of this, this old liar seems to approve that this droplet amulet belongs to me? Could it be that Guo Dongshan shot me in a bloody hole that day, and my blood flowed onto this droplet talisman, so that it recognized me as the master?

The old liar was so addicted to cigarettes that he smoked one and continued another, completely shattering my hopes of regaining a stock.

The old liar continued: "I ascended to the Heavenly Realm two thousand years ago, and my duty is to guard this 'Bi Xi Jue' in the 'Tianyan Dao Palace'. I have lived happily for more than 1,200 years, but as a result, I lost my treasure, and I was demoted to the mortal world, I am so old, where can I find a job, and I have lived this kind of poor life for 800 years! ”

Speaking of the sadness of love, the old liar also squeezed out a few muddy tears.

I was a little puzzled, so I asked, "Aren't you a god?" You can turn stones into gold, or use magic weapons to eliminate violence and peace, and the worst thing is to set up a stall at the entrance of the hospital to tell fortunes, and you can also mix two dollars! ”

The old liar smiled bitterly and said stupidly: "I am an immortal who has been demoted, and my mana cannot be used at will, otherwise I will alarm the god of holding the law, and I will bombard me with heavenly thunder, and it will not disappear!" Just now, in order to make you believe that I am an immortal, I used immortal arts, and I don't know what the consequences are! ”

I also feel that the phoenix that has fallen off is not as good as a chicken, and the Seven Fairies and Weaver Girls and the like estimate that there is still a way to be a "chicken" after being degraded to mortal dust, and the male gods who have been degraded are not qualified to be "chickens......

The old liar took another look at my drop amulet and asked, "I said, you probably don't know the use of this 'Bi Xi Jue', right?" ”

I stretched out my right arm, and in a flash of my mind, I changed into a crystal pan to show him, and in a flash, I changed into a crystal spatula, and said very proudly, "How is it?" Ever changing! ”

Unexpectedly, when the old liar saw the frying pan I conjured, he jumped like thunder, and stomped his feet and howled as if I had insulted his wife: "You pig, you stupid, how can the treasure of the heavenly realm let you be so ruined?" O treasure—"

I heard the old liar scold me, and I was so angry that I slapped a crystal pan over, and the old liar was dumbfounded with a "bang". The red wolf has filmed thousands of episodes of the gray wolf like this, and the pot swept across the green grassland, I can't shoot you old liar?

The old liar saw that I was fighting with arms, he was unarmed, and he didn't dare to use immortal arts, so he had to hide far away, and his heart was angry, so he reached out and picked up the cigarette butt on the ground, lit it and took a hard sip.

"Old liar...... Old immortal, Xu Dazhen, "I think I should touch it again after hitting it, "Did I use it wrong?" Is there any other use for this thing? ”

The old liar was silent in a huff, and when he saw that my face had changed, and his right arm had turned into a crystal kitchen knife, he jumped up: "Don't move!" The gentleman doesn't move his hands! You've just touched a little bit of fur, and this baby is driven by immortal magic! ”

"Immortal magic?" I became interested.

The old liar seemed to be waiting for me to ask, so he hurriedly came over again, and said impatiently: "'Tianyan Dao Palace' has a volume of true scriptures called 'Tianyan Sutra', which is divided into five volumes, and the one that drives 'Bi Xi Jue' is the 'Miao' character scroll!" ”

"That's an old liar...... Old immortal, will you do this? I asked excitedly, but I thought that this heavenly immortal was too uneducated, Shui Xing was the "Miao" character scroll, and the other four volumes were estimated to be "Xinsen Yanyao".

The old liar coughed, cleared his throat and said nothing, and sat with his head held high, with an expectant look in his eyes.

"Will you?" I haven't figured out what an old liar means.

The old liar was a little disappointed, and after finding out that I was not on the Tao at all, he chirped and said, "Don't pass it on lightly!" Back then, the four masters and apprentices of Tang Sanzang went to Lingshan to learn scriptures, and they also handed over a purple gold bowl as a 'personnel'! ”

Only then did I understand that this old liar wanted to ask for bribes, grandma's, who had been in the world for 800 years, and had learned all the unhealthy tendencies.

But seeing that this old liar is really miserable, unlike me who also "sided" a little nurse as a backer, and I had no worries about food and clothing, I had to take out all the money in my pocket, and even turned it over to show him, "It's just forty-six yuan, it's gone!" ”

The old liar also knew that I had no money, so he reluctantly took over all my family property, and took away the electronic watch I bought on a stall on my wrist, and then took out a piece of torn paper from his arms, handed it to me, and said: "This is the first three articles that I wrote down from memory after I went down to earth, and I will write you the rest when I remember them!" ”

When I looked at the paper, it was tattered and wrinkled as if it had just been wiped on the buttocks, and there were several large black characters written on it: "Specializing in the treatment of venereal diseases, syphilis genital warts, one needle is effective", which was removed from the telephone pole. All of a sudden, his heart was on fire, and he directly turned his right hand into a crystal spatula, and the old liar looked at it and shouted: "Look at the back, look at the back!" ”

I turned it over and took a look, only to find that the back was dense, crooked and written thousands of words, ballpoint pen, pencil, water-based pen, red, blue, black, simplified, traditional and seal, all kinds of handwriting, and I didn't hit one place: "The gods write such a bad hand?" ”

The old liar laughed: "Life is forced, life is forced, and I am used to drawing talismans before liberation!" ”

/* If you like it, please collect, recommend, reward, all kinds of requests! A little finger will be the biggest motivation for the creation of the old flying demon! Thank you*/