I can't remember who once said, "If you really love someone, if you don't have a relationship with him in this life, please let go of your entangled hands, why bother others and look down on yourself; If you really love someone, if you don't have a relationship with him in this life, please bless him with both hands, this is the way to really love someone. If none of this can be done, please stop talking about love, don't blaspheme the sanctity of love, your love is so selfish, selfish that it forms a cage of desire, entangles others, and locks yourself"...... Su Yingrong can't remember where she saw it, whether it was created by Chinese people or a translation.

In short, after meeting on the street that day, seeing that he is now happy and sweet, he should be blessed like this philosophy, why is there still some faint hope in his heart....... When I thought about it too much, the baby in my belly kicked me, and my abdomen tightened, and I took back my memory. Stroking his stomach and holding it in his mouth, "Okay, okay, Mom remembers, you can't be emotionally nervous, you can't be emotionally bad, you can't think about Dad's bad, he's a good father, you have a good father." ”

At night, under the dim orange lamp, Su Yingrong read a diary, which recorded the bits and pieces when she was in college, and she never wrote it again after graduation, although the diary recorded a lot of beautiful memories, but it was precisely because the diary was discovered by Jiang Pengcheng that it became the evidence in Jiang Pengcheng's mouth, which started the journey of nightmares, and remembered Jiang Pengcheng, did this person ever exist? Why would it be a dream......

After graduation, the mother who worked in the Personnel Bureau was very smooth and placed a job for herself, almost a day without waiting, for her mother's arrangement, she personally still liked it very much, she didn't want to enter the complicated society, because her mother was a typical example around her, and her mother was the section chief of the Personnel Bureau. Responsible for the placement of graduates, because her work is relatively powerful in the agency, so her mother often goes out to socialize, and the right can make people strong, so her mother's ideas eventually become decisions, relatively speaking, her father, who has been a lifelong teacher, is soft-spoken at home, and her mother's most common words are "You don't understand today's society", it is precisely because I was fed up with my mother's hegemony that I chose the normal school closest to my father. At first, my mother insisted on studying medicine on her own. But later, seeing that the two of them resisted strongly, they finally took the initiative to give up their insistence, and now that I think about it, no matter how I choose, I still can't escape my mother's control, because it is much easier for normal students to change careers. I thought my mother respected her hobbies. I was even ready to dedicate my life in front of the three-foot podium, whenever I picked up a textbook. Scenes from the school demonstration class will come to mind. I can't help but think, what is Yang Jinghui doing at the moment, and has he successfully found a job after graduation......?

When I got home that day, my mother told me that someone had called me today, and I deliberately emphasized that it was a boy. But when I talked to him on the phone, I didn't say a few words. Mom found a reason to interrupt the phone, in the era when communication was so underdeveloped, it was very rare for two people to have the right time to talk, although he felt that Yang Jinghui's words were not finished. But the guest who came had to meet him. Mom invited the head of the personnel section of the Education Bureau, who is her good sister and her good friend, after seeing herself, the aunt kept praising herself, and then in less than a week, the Education Bureau was seconded to the Education Bureau with a piece of paper, and it was at that time that Jiang Pengcheng began to appear in his life.

At first, he didn't bother himself, he was annoyed by his own girl at the table, Xie Shiling, but it couldn't be said that Jiang Pengcheng was bothering the girl, and the girl always called Jiang Pengcheng, so Jiang Pengcheng didn't care whether he worked or not, so he went to the office to tease and scold the girl, and after a few days Jiang Pengcheng began to notice himself, he hated his frivolous boy's appearance, "Ouch, there is still a cold beauty here?" ...... "I often glared at myself angrily, or got up and left."

And one day, just after sending a text message to Yang Jinghui, "What if life is only as it is when I first see you", Jiang Pengcheng suddenly appeared in front of him, startling himself, he looked at the office when there was no one before secretly broadcasting the words left by the pager. That Jiang Pengcheng pushed a paper bag in front of him, and told himself to open it, he didn't think about it at the time, and refused directly, then Jiang Pengcheng was persistent, and said to himself, "I know that these capitals of mine are very precious in the eyes of others, and they may be nothing in your eyes, I just want to say that I am serious about you, I didn't know this feeling before, I only know that I play games and play with life, what you see is the appearance of confusing others, just like my frivolous demeanor, but I am very traditional in my heart, I think I really like you, I don't care if you reject me, as long as you're not married, I'll keep chasing until I turn you into my wife......" confessed like a hooligan ruffian, almost moved himself for a moment, of course, just for a few seconds, although he knew that his eyes were firm and sincere when he confessed, he didn't lie, but he already had Yang Jinghui in his heart, Jiang Pengcheng was nothing at that moment, and he was proud like a white swan at the moment, waiting for you to clean up these warblers, Let's talk about it after whitewashing. In fact, his words are also full of weight, if it is replaced by ordinary people who are used to the kind of people who are used to hugging and shouting, and who are used to being favored as the center, they will not be able to accept their attitude anyway, but Jiang Pengcheng has really changed, his speech and demeanor, and even his dress, just like a different person.

And Yang Jinghui's news is getting less and less, and there are a few times when he has passed the text message like a stone sinking into the sea, and he feels incomprehensible, so he has to comfort himself, he is busy, or the signal is not good and cannot be received, but his mother's words made him understand, and his mother asked, "There is a boy who always calls, he is Yang Jinghui in your diary, right?" Instantly, he became irrational, "Why are you peeking at my diary, why are you peeping at me?" ”。“ Spying on you? I'm your mother, alas, I gave birth to you and raised you, you don't say anything, I can only guess what you think, I don't look at your diary and I'm almost blinded by you, I tell you, it's impossible for you to be with him, what is he doing now? In the organs? I heard it all when you called, he was in the township planning and fertility office, and a gay man was not doing a good job, and he circled around the woman's big belly. I can tell you, my mother is a person who has come over, it is for your good, the conditions for marrying are equivalent, you will not be poor if you marry in the past, all the feelings in this world have to be built on a material basis, poor couples mourn everything, and there is no economic foundation to support what is a fantasy. If you really marry that poor boy from another place, you will have ...... cry in the future."

"You ......", the more I was told by the old agency's mother, the more uncomfortable I became, and I fainted in front of my eyes.

After waking up, she was in the hospital, her mother's eyes were indescribably complicated, she took away her father who was waiting for her to wake up, "Okay, my daughter is also awake, you go home and take a look at the chicken soup", after the father left, the mother slapped herself as soon as she raised her hand, and her mother cried and said, "I really failed to educate you, you really disappointed me, where is Yingrong, who has made me proud since childhood?" I thought you had a girl who was measured and able to love herself, but I didn't expect you to lose your body so confused, how long did you not come on your period? I suddenly woke up, graduation to today is still a few days and a month, their menstrual cycle is shorter, has been very accurate, this month is four days late, the original night of parting, the love is deep-rooted, when I think of this, my heart has no reason to feel relieved. I didn't argue with my mother, I was waiting for her next step. "Why are you so confused, although the current society is different from the past and is more open to this aspect, but no man will want his wife to be opened, Chinese men want to marry a virgin in their bones, you despise yourself like this, you will become the ......handle of other people's lives", my mother is really sad. Then she took out a pill, taking advantage of the short time in bed and the cells were still small, you can take the medicine yourself and beat it out. I just asked you for a sick leave and said that you were anemic, so you took the opportunity to recuperate.

And when her mother said this, Su Yingrong's mind was imagining, "If this little baby can be born smoothly, both he and she can be very smart and beautiful, the man is like him, and the woman is like herself......", "Do you eat it yourself or I will feed you?" Mom's words woke him up suddenly, and he turned over and got out of bed and knelt at his mother's feet, "Mom, how can you be so ruthless, he is your grandson who has never met, how can you tell him like this, I don't want to have an abortion, I want to give birth to him", my mother raised her palm again, and stubbornly sent it to her cheek, after her mother slapped her twice, she began to open her mouth sadly, "I want my Dong Shuping to be shrewd all my life, and in the end I am the most defeat", I kowtowed to my mother and begged my mother not to do this, Orr, The mother held her face, caressed her red cheeks with heartache, and the mother said ruthlessly, if you don't have an abortion, it's okay, but there is one condition. Hearing this, I couldn't care about the swelling and pain on my face, my eyes were shining, and my mother's next words were undoubtedly like letting myself make a choice between life and death, "I can't marry that poor boy, my mother will find a good person for you to marry as soon as possible." "Is that really the only way to it?" Mom said again, "Even if you are not pregnant, I will not let you marry that poor boy, he has no future for himself, he can't support himself, you gave up the prefecture-level city to a remote township to suffer, what kind of living space do you give your future children, you yourself have been educated in the prefecture-level city since childhood, but your own children play with a group of rural children, you sacrifice the child's future for your own love, do you say this is a responsible mother should do?" I won't force you first, you should think about it, how to choose you to make a decision as soon as possible. You still have more than 20 days to hesitate, and in 49 days everything will be fine......." (To be continued......)