Chapter 169: I don't want to let go of your hand
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All this is Li Yilan's fault, and it is also appropriate to let Li Yilan bear it, there is no reason for her to keep everything in her heart and not speak out. For a woman who is pregnant with a child, it is not good to think too much.
When Xu Yaran said everything, although it can't be said that she immediately became refreshed, she was also more comfortable. Some words have been pressed in her heart for too long and no one has told her, so it hurts to press her heart, but now she has said all of them to the parties, and she is immediately much more relaxed.
Xu Yaran breathed a sigh of relief, feeling much better.
She cried for a while, then she stopped sobbing, crying for too long, the diaphragm was a little damaged, although she stopped crying, but she started to fight.
Li Yilan listened to Xu Yaran hate him one by one, and his heart trembled. He had long known that Xu Yaran hated her, as early as when he came back to find Xu Yaran for the first time after he left quietly. knew that Xu Yaran hated him, but he just didn't expect that he and Xu Yaran would have such a quarrel at that time.
But now Li Yilan is a little glad that Xu Yaran hates him, after seeing Xu Yaran treat him coldly. He felt that hatred was better than nothing, and how could there be hate without love? Having hatred means that he still has a place in Xu Yaran's heart.
Not hating enough means that you didn't love enough.
Now Xu Yaran still hates him, which shows that Xu Yaran still loves him in her heart and still can't let go of the relationship she once had. It shows that he still has a chance, if Xu Yaran is willing to drink a cup of coffee calmly with him, it means that Xu Yaran no longer has him in his heart. Then he is really weak and has no chance.
Now Xu Yaran hates him because he hasn't given up on him Li Yilan, nor has he given up the time that was short, but happy. What Li Yilan has to do is how to awaken this love in the deepest part of hatred.
Xu Yaran said so much just now, the breakup and the child are the most important. Li Yilan was a little secret, it turned out that what Xu Yaran had always minded was that when he left, he didn't even say anything about breaking up, and just left.
In fact, Li Yilan didn't want to, when he left Xu Yaran. In fact, he also thought about it a lot, on the one hand, he didn't have the courage to tell Xu Yaran about breaking up the two people, and he couldn't bear to face Xu Yaran. He was afraid that as soon as he saw Xu Yaran, he wouldn't be able to say anything?
Ren Jingchu's matter with him is also imminent, and the longer he is with Xu Yaran, the more he finds that he can't do without Xu Yaran. It is a completely different feeling from falling in love with other women at the beginning, so I didn't break up like I used to like a woman, say a word of breakup, and send a sum of money, so relaxed and happy.
Only for Xu Yaran, he couldn't bear to say that he would break up.
And Li Yilan was also selfish at that time, thinking that if she didn't break up, this relationship would not be over. If it is not recognized by both parties, it means that the relationship is not over yet. If he has the opportunity in the future, he can save this relationship.
His little calculations, as well as his hesitation, all became what Xu Yaran minded the most.
Seeing that Xu Yaran finally stopped, she kept beating her diaphragm, but she didn't cry anymore. Li Yilan quietly breathed a sigh of relief.
He gently stroked Xu Yaran's long hair hanging down on his shoulders, since the breakup, he seemed to have hugged Xu Yaran intimately like today for a long time. Touching Xu Yaran's hair, hmm...... It seems to have grown a lot.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know I had made so many mistakes. To make you so uncomfortable, I admit that I'm a bastard, it's all my fault, it's all my fault. Li Yilan took Xu Yaran's words very smoothly and said to Xu Yaran gently.
"The reason why I refused to break up with you was because I was reluctant to let go of this relationship. I am reluctant to say that I broke up, I don't say break up, because I think that one day, I will reconnect with you again and rebuild the old friendship with you. I'm afraid that after we break up, we will never be able again, and I'm afraid that you will forget me. Li Yilan hugged Xu Yaran hard and rubbed it into her arms. As if he was afraid that Xu Yaran would leave him.
In fact, Li Yilan didn't expect that Xu Yaran would be so hesitant about breaking up, and after thinking about it, she had to say this to Xu Yaran.
Xu Yaran listened to Li Yilan's words, and she was indeed touched. Li Yilan hugged her very hard. She felt that she was about to suffocate, but she didn't know if it was because Li Yilan hugged her too tightly, or because of Li Yilan's words.
Li Yilan felt that Xu Yaran's breathing was stagnant, and he knew that what he had just said had an effect.
He also knew that he had not guessed wrong, even though Xu Yaran hated him as much as he said, he still had feelings for him, and Xu Yaran still liked himself.
Li Yilan's heart was happy, he put his arm around Xu Yaran's hands, put his arm on Xu Yaran's shoulder, and broke up with himself and Xu Yaran's soft body.
The distance between him and Xu Yaran was half an arm's length, and his hands were pressed on Xu Yaran's shoulders.
Li Yilan and Xu Yaran's eyes intersected in the air, Li Yilan looked at Xu Yaran's eyes seriously, and said to Xu Yaran: "I know that I broke your heart at the beginning, but even if it is for the sake of the child in the belly, can you forgive me once?" Others say that the prodigal son will not change his money, but now that I have turned back, are you willing to let me come back? Back to you and the child? ”
Li Yilan's words seemed to have magical power, and Li Yilan's words eroded Xu Yaran's reason and Xu Yaran's hatred for Li Yilan. Xu Yaran felt that her hatred for Li Yilan was slowly decreasing.
She always felt that something was wrong, but she couldn't grasp it for a while.
Xu Yaran looked at Li Yilan with a tangled expression, Li Yilan's appearance was really serious, not like she was joking.
However, Xu Yaran's heart was always relieved, and she always felt as if she had ignored something.
Li Yilan saw that Xu Yaran didn't speak, and looked at herself blankly. Li Yilan also knew that she couldn't push Xu Yaran too hard, Xu Yaran had never been a smart woman.
Otherwise, Xu Yaran would not have waited ten years for a man who didn't love him. How could she be willing to listen to a man's explanation after letting him hurt her so much? All this proves that Xu Yaran has never been a smart person when facing feelings, and she will not judge the situation. Win the best for herself.
If Xu Yaran also understood this, it would be much easier to find Xu Yaran to get back together. But if Xu Yaran really understands, then she is not Xu Yaran, and it is not worth Li Yilan to spend so much effort to love such a woman, to the point that she can't live without her.
Li Yilan looked at Xu Yaran's flat stomach, and his heart was also very soft. The little guy in Xu Yaran's belly is his son Li Yilan, and this child is also the bridge of feelings between him and Xu Yaran, and it is a bridge that will never be broken.
Thinking of the child in Xu Yaran's belly, Li Yilan suddenly had an urge to touch Xu Yaran's belly. Although Xu Yaran is almost three months old now, the child has not yet taken shape and does not feel anything.
But Li Yilan just wanted to touch his own child, his and Xu Yaran's child.
Li Yilan thought so, and he did it. He reached out and touched Xu Yaran's stomach, Xu Yaran felt the pressure on his stomach, and Xu Yaran woke up suddenly. She took a steady step back, avoiding Li Yilan's hand.
Xu Yaran looked at Li Yilan with a vigilant expression, and her eyebrows and eyes were full of vigilance.
She finally came to her senses, why should she believe Li Yilan's words. How much credibility does Li Yilan's words have, it was because she believed in Li Yilan too much that she fell to the point of pain today.
Li Yilan can lie to him once, and she may lie to her a second time, although she Xu Yaran is not smart, but she doesn't want to be a fool and be deceived by the same man again and again.
He had no way of determining whether what Li Yilan was saying now was true, and since he was not sure, it was false. She understands what it is like to be deceived by someone she loves, she doesn't want to go through it a second time, she has no ability and no strength.
Forget it, let's just forget it between her and Li Yilan, Li Yilan shouldn't belong to her ordinary self after all. is a woman with Li Yilan, and it shouldn't be herself.
Li Yilan withdrew her hand a little embarrassed, seeing that Xu Yaran was wary of herself between her eyebrows, Li Yilan seemed to have eaten a fly raw, which made him feel very uncomfortable, he and Xu Yaran should not be like this.
Xu Yaran's vigilance against him made his heart tingle a little.
"Yaran, what's wrong with you?" Li Yilan held back her discomfort and looked at Xu Yaran with a gentle smile. His eyes were gentle, and when he looked at Xu Yaran, it was as if he was looking at the biggest treasure in this world.
Xu Yaran sneered, Li Yilan didn't want to hurt her a second time. She couldn't afford it, she finally figured it out now, it didn't matter if she didn't have a man, now she just had to have children. She can live with her children. She doesn't need a husband, and her children don't need a father.
So all the confessions and sweet words that Li Yilan just said to her, Xu Yaran didn't want them all.
"Since you left in the first place, don't come back, you left in the first place because of the hardship? You're back now, don't you have any troubles? Xu Yaran took two steps back, retreated outside the safety zone, and separated herself from Li Yilan for some distance before she spoke coldly.
She was so weak that Li Yilan just said a few words, and her heart melted immediately. She admitted that Li Yilan was definitely a demonic obstacle in her heart, she must overcome it, and she couldn't be hurt by the same man anymore.
Since this man decided to leave for his own sake, let's leave completely. He can give himself up for one suffering, who knows if he has a second suffering, a third suffering, or even a fourth or fifth suffering.