Maybe it's a joke of fate, while I have suffered calamity in the past few days, Shu Zhe has also been unlucky.

Uncle Huoqiu's real name is Shu Dongbo (pronounced like "Su Dongpo"), one year younger than the squad leader's father, and he is the squad leader and Shu Zhe's own uncle.

He has been working as a forest ranger in remote mountainous areas for a long time, and he often can only return home once a year, plus he encountered a forest fire on Chinese New Year's Eve last year and had to stay behind, resulting in the calculation, he has not returned to Dongshan City for nearly two years.

However, his wife, the squad leader and Shu Zhe's aunt, went to the forest area to visit her husband every 3 or 5 months.

When the squad leader was 12 years old, he once went to the forest area with his aunt to see Uncle Dongbo during the summer vacation, but he didn't take Shu Zhe with him because Shu Zhe didn't want to travel long distances, so he stayed at another relative's house.

At that time, Uncle Dongbo didn't know how to access the Internet wirelessly, so he didn't have the ID of "Uncle Fireball", whether in the eyes of the squad leader or others, it was a standard mountain hunter image, and he was wearing a ranger's uniform, with a chest badge and armband of the forestry department.

Uncle Toba, who has seen bears more times than people, was very happy to see his niece come to see him, because Shusha expressed her love for firearms when she was very young, so she used that summer vacation to teach Shusha everything, not only taught her niece how to use a shotgun, but also took her on a field hunt.

In the past, I always thought that Uncle Ranger, who taught the class leader to use a shotgun, should be a cool and trustworthy person, but now that I think about it, I suddenly realize how irresponsible it is to teach a 12-year-old girl to use a shotgun, and to know that the other party has a family heirloom shotgun hidden in the house!

"Sasha, starting from your grandfather's grandfather, our family has been hunters for generations, so it is my duty to teach you how to use a gun."

"Who made me have no children myself, and your brother is not useful, and he doesn't even dare to come over to the forest area?"

"Xiao Zhe, Xiao Zhe, he is not useless!" Only 12 years old, just graduated from elementary school, the class leader who still has a strong taste of Lori, carried a shotgun that was more than half his height, and defended his younger brother, "Xiao Zhe is too attracted to mosquitoes because of his physique, and he attracts mosquitoes more than me, if he comes to the forest area, he will be stung to death by mosquitoes!" ”

"Okay, I won't speak ill of Shu Zhe." Uncle Dongbo touched the head of the Lori squad leader, "Anyway, whoever bullies you in the future, you are like fighting a wild boar yesterday, and you will kill him with a 'bang'!" ”

It's you who will be killed with a "bang"! How did you go from an experienced mountain hunter to a pervert who buys female model underwear online!

The root of everything started a year and a half ago, when the area where Shu Dongbo was a forest ranger was couriered, and he dug up an old ginseng when he was patrolling the mountains.

In the town at the foot of the mountain, after selling the old ginseng for a good price, Shu Dongbo had plenty of money, and heard that the wireless Internet signal had covered his forest ranger's hut, so he bought a laptop on a whim, plus a 3G network card, and started his network career.

"Computers are so complicated, I didn't think I could learn them." Shu Dongbo later confessed, "But I found that I could use it to download it for free from the Internet**, so I learned it day and night, and I quickly learned it." ”

Because the mountain patrol is particularly boring, and he has been separated from his wife for a long time, Shu Dongbo, a very sturdy ranger, often endures the pain of having nowhere to vent his desires at night, so the Internet has become a very important part of his nightlife, causing him to become an old networm in only half a year.

But after all, the Internet is an ethereal existence, and after seeing a huge amount of **, Shu Dongbo, who felt empty, began to patronize adult products online stores.

Although I didn't visit our online store for the first time, I inevitably went to our alliance online store and heard the name of our "Happy Valley Love Store".

Later, under the introduction of "Friends", I learned that my online store was selling clothes worn by female models, and I immediately heard about it and became a repeat customer of my family.

Seeing the photo of Shu Zhe's pseudo-mother on the homepage of my online store, Shu Dongbo did feel a bit like his niece Shu Sha at first, but he knew that Shu Sha would never be able to make that kind of embarrassing posture and expression, so he only regarded Sister Hongdou as a person who was a bit like Shu Sha.

Because he hadn't seen Shu Zhe for at least two years, Shu Dongbo couldn't have imagined that the original women's clothes he bought were worn by his nephew.

Shu Dongbo, who has been incarnated as "Uncle Fireball" on the Internet, unknowingly, took the women's clothes worn by his nephew and vented his desire to his nephew's pseudo-maiden photo, which led to a decrease in physical sensitivity and vigilance, and finally capsized in the gutter and was attacked by a black bear while patrolling the mountains.

Fortunately, the emaciated camel was bigger than the horse, and Shu Dongbo, whose basic qualities still existed, although he lost his gun and had a deep wound on his right arm, managed to escape alive and did not become the black bear's lunch.

Masturbation really kills people! The squad leader's ancestral hunter aura can also be wiped out! Otherwise, how dare a black bear approach you with a gun?

Or is it that the ancestral hunter aura of the squad leader's family can only be inherited by one person per generation, and once he loses his virginity, his brilliance will dim or even disappear?

"That, squad leader, I have a way to make all cats and dogs no longer afraid of you, I wonder if you're interested in trying it?"

Forget the above delusions, otherwise the 18.51 mm and 16.82 mm caliber shotguns are up to me.

Shu Dongbo was attacked by a black bear, because the leader didn't know that he was dizzy from masturbation, and thought that he was conscientious in maintaining the mountains and forests like he had done more than ten years before, and he was unlucky to get this kind of thing, so he quickly assessed Shu Dongbo's work injury.

After the injury, Shu Dongbo did not recover well, his right arm showed mild muscle atrophy symptoms, and his mental state was not good, so after careful consideration, the Lin Political Bureau decided to give Shu Dongbo a disability pension and let him retire early, so Shu Dongbo finally returned to Dongshan City after a two-year absence, and he did not have to go back to work in the future.

The day he went home, it was neither early nor late, just in time for the day when the head of the class organized a field trip and then entrusted Shu Zhe to his aunt to take care of.

Shu Dongbo, who didn't notify his family to pick up the station and dragged his suitcase back with his left arm, was stunned when he saw Shu Zhe sitting on the sofa at his home for the first time.

"Why doesn't this kid have any manhood! It's not like my brother or me at all, it's like Sasha's sister! ”

When Shu Zhe opened his mouth to say, "Hello uncle", Shu Dongbo muttered even more in his heart: "The voice is not good, I remember that when I was his age, I would have changed my voice a long time ago!" ”

How did Shu Dongbo know that Shu Zhe taught himself the pronunciation of "false voice" in order not to show his stuffing when he was in the video of "Coriander Stuffed Buns", and imitated the girl's voice to the point of being fake, and now he occasionally shows a little clue in life.

Although her husband was disabled by a work-related injury, fortunately, he did not lack arms or legs, and his muscle-atrophied right arm did not continue to deteriorate, but was thinner than his left arm.

So Shu Zhe's aunt was very happy and made a lot of meals to celebrate, and Shu Zhe's presence also reduced the loneliness of the couple without children.

After nightfall that night, Shu Dongbo recalled his nephew's delicate appearance when he came out of the bathroom, with clear hair, fair skin, and slightly flushed cheeks due to hot fumigation.

The more I look at it, the more I look at it, the more I feel that it is the same person, there is a pose close to the finger of an orchid when taking pictures, and it is often used unconsciously by Shu Zhe when he drinks water from a cup recently.

As a result, Shu Dongbo, the fireball uncle, was tortured by his inner thoughts and couldn't sleep, and when his wife fell asleep, he lightly touched his nephew's room.

Shu Zhe, who was already asleep, his slender body was hidden under a thin blanket, his delicate collarbones and pink shoulders exuded a forbidden temptation outward.

The side face under the faint moonlight shows the beauty of quiet and softness, and the moist and crystalline lips give people the illusion of lipstick on it.

Shu Dongbo's eyes were red, and he was close to Shu Zhe's ears in a daze, and whispered: "Sister Red Bean, Sister Red Bean?" ”

As a result, Shu Zhe turned over, dazed, and muttered a dream word: "Video chat, from 200 yuan an hour......"

Shu Dongbo immediately understood everything! Seven orifice bleeding! Furious! I thought I was well-informed on the Internet.,I actually went to the online store.,I bought the original women's clothes of the pseudo-mother and went back to masturbate.,And this pseudo-mother is still her nephew!

It's just a mistake to think of Zhengtai as Lori.,What's more,And because of masturbation,I almost fed myself to a bear.,Now the work-related injury appraisal says second-class disability! used his nephew's underwear to and made himself a second-class disability, how could he accept it!

Immediately got angry and shook Shu Zhe awake, Shu Zhe was dizzy at first, and when Shu Dongbo said that he was "Uncle Fireball", this scared Shu Zhe and couldn't sleep anymore.

"Uncle, I'...... I was forced by the owner of that adult product store, my sister's classmates! ”

Shu Zhe knelt on the bed and begged for mercy, and sold me with the first sentence.

not only knelt down and begged for mercy, but also brought rain to pear blossoms, crying and begging his uncle to forgive himself in front of his sister and aunt.

Shu Dongbo looked at his nephew who was cowering on the bed, he was originally very angry, but suddenly a feeling in his heart that he had never felt before, and some worse fetish began to awaken.

"It's just that I spent unjust money...... Shu Dongbo pointed to his shrunken right arm, "You hurt me like this, how should you compensate me?" ”

Because Shu Dongbo used to be the Chinese version of Bei Ye, even if his right arm was slightly atrophied, it was thicker than Shu Zhe's calf. Shu Zhe glanced up and muttered, "It doesn't seem like there's much of a problem......

"Bastard!" Shu Dongbo was so angry that he almost woke up his wife in the next room, "I have a nephew like you, it's really bad for eight lifetimes!" You said! Do you still have wigs and clothes that you pretend to be a pseudo-mother? ”

"Huh?" Shu Zhe didn't understand the imminent crisis at all, and replied, "There are still some that are left at home, uncle, why are you asking this?" ”