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Y apparently quickened the pace of pursuit. One day, before leaving work, he called me: "I'm downstairs in your company. "I know he's got a surprise, but I don't think he's happy&mdah;y, unlike L, he's supposed to be a rational negotiator, and lame romanticism doesn't suit him very well. The corners of my mouth rose slightly, thinking that L was not romantic, at most it could only be regarded as domineering.

After a regular dinner, Y drove me to a new and beautiful garden complex in the city center to see his new home. Located on the 25th floor, the north-south facing embryo room, with three bedrooms and two living rooms, has good lighting. I complimented all aspects of the community until I heard Y say, "What do you want it to be?" ”

"Huh?"

Y looked at me and said meaningfully, "You can decide what kind of decoration style you want." ”

When it happened suddenly, I was stunned, and suddenly I felt that I should cry on this occasion. I am grateful for Y's sincere and firm confession, for it seems that I have never heard of a serious promise that resembles a lifetime.

Seeing that my eyes were dull for an instant, Y was a little anxious and stammered: "I, I think, understanding is a process, but, but...... Well, huh...... I mean, once we have confirmed our relationship, it may be more helpful to reach out and get to know each other...... I don't think it's easy to find the right person. Don't worry too much, you can always change people if you find that it is not suitable in the future. Finally, he changed to a soothing and teasing tone.

I lowered my eyes and listened intently. What he said was what I wanted to say, if there was no L there.

"Be my girlfriend, okay?" Y approached me and took my hands.

"Okay."

I didn't dare look into his burning eyes. But I'm sure that's the future I want.

I knew very well that Y taking me to see his new house was nothing more than a ploy to coax the girl. How can you propose marriage without talking about love? But he knew very well what I was eating, and what was the best way to confess to my heart. Y was clever enough to choose the way with the highest success rate&mdah, and if I had been ambiguous, he could have laughed it off as a joke. But I'm not stupid either. I know when the best time to react: tears in my eyes at the prospect of marriage are a great testament to the fact that I am a sincere woman who hates to marry.

Neither Y nor I are selfish or cunning. We're just familiar with the rules of the game between mature men and women.

But I didn't expect Y to be so anxious.

After I came back that day, I thought about it for a long time, first, whether Y is marriageable &mdah; second, whether my feelings for Y are real; Third, whether the decision was hasty or not. The final conclusion is: I don't know enough about Y, but feel is still on the right path; Since the first and second points need to be explored in the process of love, I think the third point is acceptable.

So I made a rational decision on the next emotional plan.

I don't have a so-called "moral responsibility" to him until I agree to marry Y, even if he has been hurt &mdah; and with me, if we end up falling in love and breaking up, we must be considered to get together and break up. Selfishly, it's time for me to have a serious relationship, even if it doesn't lead directly to the palace of marriage. Y is the right person with a lot of possibilities, so why not give it a try.

In fact, deep down I know that another reason why I accepted Y so quickly is that this is the only way for me to cut off my relationship with L. I am anxious and afraid, no matter whether I can love Y from the bottom of my heart in the end, at this stage I should use this opportunity and his strength to break free from the endless quagmire. Although I have a tacit understanding with L emotionally, reason still prevails over everything at the critical moment.

I'm going to be 30 years old. My parents and family are looking forward to it, and I need to avoid giving birth at an advanced age; I look forward to coming home from work late at night with a warm light to wait, a bowl of hot soup, no need to hide the care phone, and live a happy and quiet life as a normal person. I know what I want, and I always have been.

So I tried to see and accept Y&mdah; as my boyfriend in a new light. It's been a long time since I've been in a relationship, but I'm familiar with gentleness and thoughtfulness, from my gaze to the dishes. Although at first when Y takes my hand or puts his arm around my shoulder, I still seem unnatural&mdah;that hairy resistance returns, and I still have a hard time letting someone touch me without confirming that I love him. In the past, my boyfriends were developed by being friends for many years, and there was a process of inner confirmation. The first blind date was a little faster-paced, and I didn't quite get used to &mdah;y as well, but he was very active in debugging. In the beginning, we were still a little jerky and polite to each other, not like a young couple. It's very different from my past relationship experience, and it feels weird.

I tried to avoid admitting that I had acquiesced to such a rapid pace in order to avoid L. I persuaded myself: a lot of people are like that.

After becoming boyfriend and girlfriend, Y and I do seem to have made great strides in getting to know each other. There are some intimate topics that can be said, and the innocuous jokes still feel a lot closer.

Although I have a wait-and-see attitude towards getting married if I am in love, I will never step on two boats during a relationship&mdah;This is my bottom line, I know that L will definitely come to challenge it, but he can't do it.

After a period of silence, as always, I finally waited for L's call.

"Have you been free lately?" His lazy voice dragged on for a long time, changing the difficulty of opening his mouth in the past.

I said calmly, "It just so happens that I want to treat you to dinner." ”

"Invite me to dinner? Why? "I've never been interested in activities that don't go to bed.

"There's something I want to tell you." I say.

L's tone changed slightly: "Is there anything you can't say on the phone?" ”

"Hmm. It's better to meet and talk. ”

There was a long silence on the other end of the phone.

Then suddenly hung up.

I was a little stunned and at a loss. I just happened to have something at hand, so I went to work first.

As soon as I got to work in the afternoon, L's phone came in on time, and his tone was tough: "I'm downstairs in your company." You come down now. ”

I gasped, nervous, afraid, and excited. He said he was going to have dinner, what was he going to do now?

That's L, that's the difference between L and Y. He can make me frightened, I don't know where he will take me, but I always gladly go there, and the thrilling new world seems to be a hidden magic box in my heart.

I arranged to check the progress of the work at hand and went downstairs.