Presumably, he is now living a loving life with Wu Amaranth, and the world only knows that the newcomer laughs, so the old man will cry!

Besides, Wu Amaranth is such a beautiful woman, men in the world will be moved!

Thinking of this, I want to cry a little, I am a strong woman, and I don't cry easily, but for more than a year, I have shed all the tears of the first half of my life.

The meaning of life lies in living a colorful life, living a bright point, and I think my life is at the end.

Therefore, I am the shell, the ornament, how others put it, how to put it, all according to my will, my thoughts.

Sometimes I wonder who I am, I am Sun Quan's sister, Liu Bei's wife, and then I thought about it carefully, I am not, I am myself, Sun Shangxiang.

What is the meaning of my life, I never had to think about before.

Now, I can't figure out what I mean to live when I think about it......

I am the dead branch of the pear tree outside the window, which looks bright and brilliant on the outside, and the flowers are blooming, but my heart has dried up from the inside.

The heart is gone, the roots are there, as long as the slightest wind and grass move, it will fall into mud.

It seems to be strong, but in fact it is vulnerable, and I have been asking myself countless times in my heart whether I have ever loved him.

Say no, he never came down on my heart......

said that there was him, and I stubbornly thought that it was, the brother's life, the matchmaker's words, just because of the marriage between the husband and wife.

Life is so short, I didn't even cherish the days and happy times with him.

If I could go back to the past, I wouldn't have made things as hard for him as I did at the beginning.

I will definitely follow my heart and go on happily with him.

Now, I only have myself, and I am only left with myself, how ridiculous, how helpless......

It's painful to think about someone, who always refuses to leave your heart......

If I let go a little bit and let go a little, will it be bland, or the innocent and happy little woman who has no worries when she is not married, innocent and happy, and crazy.

I don't have any big ambitions, I just like to go to the battlefield, like a man to defend my family and country on the battlefield, and to protect the pure land of Soochow, not to be spied on by others, not to be robbed by others.

However, I clearly know that this fragmented Soochow has long been watched by others.

Among them, my husband is one, Liu Bei seems to be a benevolent and righteous monarch, but in fact, he not only peeps at Dongwu, but he also expects Cao Cao to share the world.

It's just that he lacks skills now, and he can't take care of it, once he gets the opportunity, he Liu Bei will break in desperately.

In fact, I understand all this, after all, the world belongs to the Liu family, and it is his responsibility to regain the lost old mountains and rivers.

The world of the Han family is already in jeopardy, and as a descendant of the Liu family, the royal family has an unshirkable responsibility.

Now, I can only silently support him in my heart, silently bless him, and hope that he will get what he wants as soon as possible.

These days, Ruyi is always here with me, saying that he is with me, and I always feel that someone has arranged something in the dark.

I can't do anything about this, I want to be young, I want to protect her, but I can't do anything, I can't do it.

I know that my sister-in-law, like me, also tries her best to protect her daughter, but there is nothing we can do but let it go.

If the eldest brother is still alive, will there be another world, another scene, I will not marry Xuande, and I will not be entangled with Gongjin.

Thinking of this, I smiled, and the three men who clearly said that they loved me the most hurt me the most.

Gongjin paved the way for me in the name of love, let me marry Xuande, smooth the edges and corners, remove the minions, and one day take me back to Soochow and marry him.

Sun Quan arranged everything for me in the name of love, let me take care of the overall situation, for the sake of Soochow, wronged myself, and asked me to marry Xuande.

I told them I didn't want to, and they put their tall hats on my head in the name of righteousness.

The country is in trouble, and the husband is responsible, I married Liu Bei, and in the name of harmony, I will protect Soochow and their homeland.

They didn't think about my feelings, at that time, I was discouraged, I was not even afraid of death, I was afraid of marrying Liu Bei.

I don't want to spend my life with someone I don't love, I don't want to spend my life with him like this, and I don't want to waste my time and waste my life.

I fell into the trap they had designed, but I didn't have the ability to struggle, to fight, because I lived, not just for myself.

I still have Dongwu, as well as the people of the entire Wu County, and the Sun family, if I can stay away from the smoke of gunpowder and the flames of war in this way, I am willing to exchange my life and my life for it.

From that moment on, I knew that my life would no longer have joy, no more laughter, no more sunny days.

My heart is full of holes, and they have pierced it with their cruel hearts......

I also know that from that moment on, the wound in my heart can no longer heal, and only I know if it hurts or not.

It was they who abandoned me, loved my Gongjin, loved my second brother, in front of my family and country, I was so small and unbearable......

No one can save me, not even myself......

And Liu Bei, my husband, he never let me go, and it hurt my heart deeply.

I defended him wholeheartedly, helped him, and helped him return to the police soon after he got married.

Along the way, I have never violated my heart and my own wishes, even if I broke with Gongjin and turned against Sun Quan, I am not afraid.

I am bent on supporting the Han family with Liu Bei Kuang, Kuang helping the world, in the end, I am still in Jingzhou, and he has Wu Amaranth.

His reasons are so reasonable that you can't refuse, and he says he's for Yizhou.

At that time, I was soft-hearted, and I only felt that Wu Yuan was a poor woman like me, and I only felt that he Liu Bei was just an extra woman in the room.

How ridiculous and ironic it is to think about it now, I know that in Liu Bei's heart, I am sorry for him, it is I who left him without his permission.

But is he right about me?

However, after more than a year, he amplified his momentum and shouted that he wanted to marry Wu Amaranth as his wife.

I have only been away from him for more than two years, and he really accepted Wu Amaranth, he really married her, and he also ordered the envoys to all counties and counties to run to congratulate each other.

Is he angry that I didn't say goodbye at the beginning, or did he have ulterior motives, he was telling the whole world that I had been abandoned, and his new wife was Wu Amaranth.

Now it seems that Liu Bei's move was premeditated......

I have long been abandoned by Liu Bei and calculated, and I stupidly thought that he was forced to do so, not sincerely, not because he wanted to accept Wu Amaranth as a concubine.

The stupidest person in the world is me, I still believe in him so much, defend him everywhere, take into account his feelings, his thoughts, I am wrong, I am really wrong.

Now, how ridiculous, I am a big joke, the one who is ridiculed by the world, I am the superfluous woman.

I am still stupidly thinking about others, planning for Liu Bei, let him take down Yizhou as soon as possible, how ridiculous, how self-deprecating......

I am the superfluous person, in Jingzhou, and in Soochow......

The dumbest man in the world......

The dumbest person in the world is me......

What should I do......

The world is so big that there is no place for me, and now I just want to cry, cry happily......

"Hahaha...... ”

I have been abandoned, I am an outcast, I am an outcast......

I forced each other to die, but I didn't want Sun Quan to be at the mercy of me and my life, for fear that Liu Bei would be humiliated, even if I died, I would die innocently and tragically.

However, Ruyi is different, she is still young, and her life has not yet begun, I am afraid that I will be the same, and I will be sacrificed tragically.

Ruyi is here for me, in addition to reading and writing miscellaneous books every day, she is endlessly being her female celebrity.

I look at her happy and bright smile every day, innocent, what a lovely child......

Bo Yan often came to visit me in his spare time, saying that he was visiting me, but in fact, all he came into contact with was Ruyi.

I can't say anything in my eyes, at least I can't even protect myself.

Today, Bo Yan is away from Ruyi, I know that he has something to say, no matter what he says, I am willing to listen to him, as long as he can live a better life and be more comfortable, I will have less self-blame and less guilt.

Bo Yan sat beside me, his eyes met me, he rarely indulged himself like this, for the first time in so many years, today.

I looked at him and poured him tea myself, but I didn't want to, he held my hands and snatched the pot from my hand......

He said: "This time it's the same as before, I still pour the tea myself, don't bother Xiang'er to do it yourself, you can drink it." ”

I can't fight with him......

He poured the tea and put it in my hand personally, I held the cup in both hands, and I only felt that this cup of tea, without drinking, would warm people's hearts.

He also poured himself a cup of tea, his slender fingers like shallots, pinching back and forth on the teacup, for a while, he said: "I'm leaving, the lord sent me to crusade against the Yutu rebellion, but this expedition, I don't know when I will be back, I'm here to resign." ”

He looked at me and smiled, "Please don't worry about Xiang'er." ”

After he said not to worry, he let out a long sigh......

"Brother Bo Yan, although you can rest assured to go on the expedition, don't worry about your family, I am waiting for you to come back safely."

He listened to me and told me not to worry about home, I will wait for you to come back safely.

He smiled, smiling like a child, a smile he hadn't had in years.

I saw that he was happy, and the smile on his face that I hadn't seen for a long time was all over my face.

He suddenly shook my hand and looked at me firmly, "Say goodbye today, I don't know if I can come back, I must give Xiang'er an explanation, I have to contact Ruyi as a last resort, only in this way can your second brother let you go, you will not be so painful, for more than half a year, I have been making a show, only in this way can I mislead your second brother, not only let you go, but also let him know that whether there is you or not, I can be used by him." ”

Speaking of this, Bo Yan couldn't go on, and his eager hands held me tightly, making my hand holding the teacup a little painful.

I lowered my head, tears in my eyes, and it took me a long time to gather my thoughts and say that we met late! We have known each other since childhood.

Let's say we're close! I have come very late for his childlike affection, how can I repay you......