Chapter 415: Laughing

Zhanbu asked Dongguan to leave, but Dongguan muttered a little: "The gods are chattering...... You are. ”

Zhanbu suddenly raised his voice and said in an affirmative tone: "I found out that this disease is terminally ill and there is no 'medicine' to cure it. In the real sketch "Buying Abduction", Zhao Benshan's original words were: "This disease is found to be in the late stage." Of course, the people of the Ming Dynasty didn't know what the late period was, so Sun Dan changed it to the current line so that everyone could understand it.

Hearing this, the tall winter official was not convinced, and stared at Zhan Bu angrily: "What's the matter with you?" Say something nice about the New Year, what's going on? ”

Zhan Bu was calm: "Don't get excited, you can see something wrong, oops, you don't believe it." ”

"You have to say it, believe it or not, what's going on?"

"Let's not talk about the condition, I know what you do."

Dong Guan: "Hehe, do you know what I do, what do I do?" ”

"You're a big boss in business?"

"What?" Dong Guan waved the model of the donkey in his hand: "Does the big boss sit here?" ”

Probably because the model of the donkey in his hand was so ugly, the audience under the stage laughed quietly again.

Sun Dan paid attention to it, Zhang Guifei still held her face, glanced at him angrily from time to time, and then looked at the three actors on the stage.

Such an interesting sketch, she didn't laugh, it's really admirable.

Dongguan was actually regarded as a big boss by Zhanbu, and he looked helpless.

Zhanbu still said in an affirmative tone: "You work in the restaurant. ”

Yueguan asked Zhan Bu curiously: "Boss, how do you know that he works in the restaurant?" ”

Zhan Bu smiled: "Nonsense, the smell of green onions is not strange if it is not a restaurant." ”

Dong Guandao felt strange: "How do you know, then let me ask you, what am I doing in the restaurant?" ”

Zhanbu: "Spoon-turner, chef." ”

"Impossible, you can guess that?" Dong Guan's face was incredible.

Zhanbu turned to Yueguan and said, "Big head, thick neck, not a big guy!" Isn't it? Is it a chef or not? ”

Hearing this fresh saying, the audience under the stage couldn't help but laugh.

First, it's funny to spread this statement, and secondly, Dongguan is burly and honest, and he really has a bit of the taste of those fat chefs in restaurants. After two of them, the joke came out.

Before everyone's laughter fell, more exciting was yet to come.

The winter official, who was guessed by Zhan Bu's identity, believed his words a little, and couldn't help but ask: "Ah, yes, yes, yes." So what did you just say about me, what did you say that it was serious and terminally ill, what was going on? ”

Zhanbu: "In the recent past, I don't feel like I feel a certain part of your body, which is different from what it used to be. You think, you think hard. ”

"I don't feel it, I just feel that my face is getting bigger and bigger?"

"By the way, it's not the main condition! Do you know why your face is big? "The exhibition began to flicker in earnest.

Winter Officer: "Why is that?" ”

Zhanbu: "That's because your legs are blocked by blood, and your head is suffocating." ”

The Queen Mother laughed again and said to Sun Dan beside her: "Obviously fat, how did you become suffocated, this is a bit interesting." She didn't drink tea before she spoke, but Sun Dan still carefully hid to the side, and said worriedly: "The Queen Mother watched the play, watched the play, and the excitement started immediately." ”

The winter officer asked, "Where are you holding back?" ”

Zhanbu: "I didn't say it just now, it's my legs. ”

"But there's nothing wrong with my legs."

"If you don't believe it, why don't you take two steps and try."

Dong Guan then began to walk on the stage, and everything was normal. The most annoying thing is that Zhanbu is still clapping on the side: "Let's go, come again, let's go...... Walk...... Walk. ”

His rhythm was fast and slow, and Dong Guan gradually became a little uncomfortable, and his pace became scattered.

I don't know why, the audience in the audience couldn't help but be a little worried about him when they saw Dong Guan's footsteps at the beginning. Even the Queen Mother stopped talking to Sun Dan and stared fixedly at the stage.

Zhanbu suddenly shouted, "Stop!" When the winter official stopped, he asked, "What is wrong with your legs, and why do you walk high and low at the same time?" ”

Dong Guan was also suspicious: "Probably because the shoes are wrong, the new shoes I just bought today." ”

In fact, this sketch makes use of a common physiological trait of ordinary people. Because people are accustomed to using their right leg to exert their strength, the right foot of any person is a little longer and thicker than the left foot, but everyone usually does not pay attention to it. But once the steps are 'chaotic', or the steps are too small, it is easy to become limping. If you are blindfolded, you will also appear in a large circle in place---- which is also the saying that ghosts hit the wall. ---- walking at night on the great northern plains, without the stars and the moon, without the illumination, you lose your reference and can easily go around in place all night. Of course, in a brightly lit modern society, this kind of thing is not so easy to happen.

Zhanbu: "Yes, it means that you have a sick leg and one leg is short. ”

Winter Officer: "That's not the case! If I want one leg long and one leg short, then sell pants and tell me! ”

"The pants seller tells you that you still sell pants, who is as good as my heart? Well, I'll tune it up for you. Believe it or not, your legs are lifted up with my hands, how high and high you can go, and how hard you fall, okay? Believe it or not? The leg is specified to be sick, and the right leg is short! Come, get up! As he spoke, Boss Zhan raised his hand and waved it upward.

With Zhanbu's gesture, Dong Guan's right leg lifted up vigorously and fell down heavily.

The stage was originally made of wooden planks, and she kicked down with more than a dozen feet in one breath, until she stepped on the stage. Moreover, Dong Guan's movements are very large and exaggerated, and he has been practiced, this foot is raised extremely high, and it has a bit of a high kick.

The Queen Mother smiled at Zhang Guifei in the audience: "This girl, although she is big, her body is very soft, not bad, not bad." But...... It's just that the action is ugly, and people want to laugh when they see it. ”

As he spoke, he picked up his teacup again and began to drink water.

Zhang Guifei had been sprayed with a sip of tea by the Queen Mother before, and when she saw that she had started to drink water, she was afraid in her heart. Hurriedly dodged to the side, and said in a trembling voice: "Queen Mother, this scene is rehearsed by Sun Dan, if your old man has any doubts, you can ask him." "The Queen Mother, her old man is really scary, so let's just make a mess and let her spray Sun Dan.

The Queen Mother drank the tea with a grunt, and when she saw that Concubine Zhang couldn't help dodging, she didn't feel like a block in her heart, and said secretly: Does this Concubine Zhang dislike the old body? Damn it!

However, Zhang Guifei's expression made the Queen Mother lose her interest in talking.

Queen Mother: "You have a point, let me ask Sun Dan why he wants to find such a cola child to come out and act?" Sun Dan...... Sun Dan......"

Sun Dan can also be seen around him.

It turned out that Sun Dan started drinking tea again when he saw the Queen Mother, and knew that the next joke was very funny, so he was afraid of causing trouble to himself, so he quietly fled early.

Waiting for the winter official to stomp down with more than a dozen feet, seeing that the fire was almost over, Zhanbu shouted: "Stop!" Then he asked, "Are you numb?" ”

Dong Guan groaned, kept "rubbing" his right leg, grinned in pain, and shouted: "Hemp, really numb!" ”

The Yueguan next to him asked Zhanbu in surprise: "Hey, why is he numb?" ”

Zhanbu: "Nonsense, you stomp you are numb." After speaking, he said to Dong Guan: "Walk up, walk up!" Don't control it, your legs are 100% sick, don't control it, relax! Walk! Let's go! Let's go, let's go! Let's go, don't think about it, will you come with me? Walk up, little by little, go! As he spoke, he strode in front of him, and the winter official didn't know what evil he had fallen into, so he followed him all the way.

The problem now is that Dong Guan's legs are very numb, and he is in a hurry all the way, where can he still stabilize his body, and as he walks, his steps gradually become lame, and he actually limps up one after another.

Poor Dongguan was already fat, and he walked limping around, and his appearance was even more funny.

"Silk!" The audience in the audience took a breath of cold air, and after thinking about the reason, they let out a loud laugh at the same time.

The laughter was so loud that it almost overturned the stage. I didn't care about the presence of the Queen Mother and Concubine Zhang Guifei.

In fact, the Queen Mother also leaned back with laughter, and tears rolled down her eyes: "This girl, this girl, she walks like this!" ”

Such a new entertainment program was very novel to the people of the Ming Dynasty. Moreover, because they haven't seen funny sketches and haven't heard cross talk, their laughter is too low, and no one can hold back when they see this scene.

Zhang Guifei still pulled her face first, and definitely did not give Sun Dan a cheer. I endured it for a long time, and then I couldn't help but laugh "giggle" and "messy", and laughed until her face was made by tea even more colorful.

After laughing for a long time, the winter official on the stage seemed to realize that he had become lame, and screamed in pain and horror: "Eh, eh, eh...... Oops, my mother. What's wrong with my leg? ”

The audience burst into laughter.

At this time, Zhan Bu looked indifferent, pointed to the way out and said to her: "You go, you go, you go and try." ”

Yueguan giggled and shouted in a rough voice: "You are so powerful, his good legs were actually fooled and lame by you." ”

Dongguan looked at Yue Guan in confusion: "What are you talking about?" ”

Zhanbu immediately "interjected": "Did you look at it, my daughter-in-law and 'daughter-in-law' saw it, she said that you were lame if you flickered." ”

The audience's laughter was even louder, and in order to see more clearly, there were already palace maids and eunuchs pretending to come to serve the Empress Dowager and Zhang Guifei's driving, and quietly rushed to the front row.

Seeing that there were suddenly more people around her, Zhang Guifei frowned unconsciously, and shouted in a low voice: "What are you doing?" ”

The Queen Mother didn't care: "Don't talk, watch the play." As he spoke, he went to serve the teacup again.

Concubine Zhang was startled, hurriedly closed her mouth, and subconsciously dodged away.