One midnight I was dreaming. I dreamed of countless loli, all kinds of double ponytails and bangs cutely sent roast chicken with spring cakes to my mouth. My legs cramped with excitement and I was about to sweep away the leaves when a phone rang and pulled me back to reality. Outside the window, lightning and thunder roared, and the sound of running water in the kitchen could be faintly heard. I shuddered, picked up the phone, and heard a monster-like whine from the other side:

"Xu Ge! I was kicked out by my mom and borrowed it for one night at your house! Please eat roast chicken! ”

“。。。。”

Hold your grandma's legs! Get lost!

I couldn't resist the temptation of the roast chicken in my dream, so I put on my pants and went downstairs to pick up Jiezi. Carrying a small pitiful backpack, Jiezi pulled out a crumpled cigarette case in the storm outside the building, and looked at me aggrievedly.

"Song, it's not burning."

Point your grandma's legs! Where's my roast chicken?!

Seeing him helpless like a chicken in the midst of lightning and thunder, I felt pity. My kindness touches the world.

Then he dragged him upstairs and wrung water out of his hair. He said softly, Xiaoyi is dead, you know?

I stopped in shock. "When? Why? ”

"Depression, I turned on the gas at home, and it was late when I arrived. The ambulance carried the person away, leaving nothing behind. ”

A bolt of lightning slammed down right in front of the window. I don't know what to say.

I don't actually know Xiaoyi. But Jie Zi knows. They met in college and walked side by side for many winters and summers together. Jiezi blushed his head on the day he proposed to Xiaoyi, and asked Xiaoyi loudly with a moonstone ring under the blue sea and blue sky of Hawaii.

"Xiaoyi! Marry me, okay! We don't have children in the future! I'm afraid you'll hurt! We have dogs! ”

The friends cheered excitedly with the priest's head, and the priest struggled to spit out the words, letting go of Lao Tzu to die.

But Xiao Yi shook her head heavily. Then he walked away quickly.

We were stunned on the spot with Jiezi. The priest broke free and looked meaningfully in Xiaoyi's direction.

I still remember that look from the priest.

The night she learned of Xiaoyi's death, Jiezi was drunk. And I talked a lot.

"Xu Ge, let me tell you, in fact, Xiaoyi is a very introverted person. She was also bullied because she couldn't play with the girls in the same dormitory. And after being isolated, he went abroad. At that time, she seemed to start taking medicine. ”

"Xiaoyi has studied abroad, but it doesn't seem to have improved, but it has intensified."

"Her family wasn't very wealthy, and she and I were both children at the time. She told me that her three views were subverted so quickly that she couldn't bear it. ”

"But I was so muddy at the time, I only knew about computer games, I didn't know about her."

Later, Jiezi was completely drunk and died.

I remembered that when I was a student, there were people who didn't fit in. After every class activity, she can always be seen crouching in the corner and playing with ants. At that time, I was tightly controlled by my mother because of the cash bank, and I often blackmailed her to invite me to go to the commissary to buy soda and play the arcade.

She never cared how much money I spent on him, and as long as I talked to her and played with her, she happily offered to contribute coins.

It wasn't until a later class activity that the teacher asked for a team of two. I ran over to my then-best friend and turned around to see her right behind me. She looked at me with an expectant gaze, and the whole class looked at me with disdain.

My face was hot, and I yelled at her loudly, why stay away from me!

At that time, her eyes seemed to be covered with a gray cloth. She stood still, looking at me with an expression of extreme vulnerability and hurt.

I turned my head and pretended nothing had happened.

The next day, I rushed to the class at school, and my classmates were talking about it, and I heard that the unsocial classmate had transferred to another school. I had the last image of her in my mind, and I turned my head and plunged into the small group of central gossip.

"It's said to have gone abroad!"

"She doesn't have much money in her family."

"It seems that her parents sold the family's small restaurant, and the business is not good anyway."

"This kind of person can go abroad, look at her rustic appearance, hahaha."

A similar laugh erupted. I froze aside, and those immature but vicious faces continued throughout my student years.

All the bystanders were accomplices in the murder of this girl.

I gradually forgot the girl's name and appearance. The guilt and insecurity I felt about that girl when I grew up never left me. Later, Jaiko excitedly introduced me to his girlfriend Xiaoyi. I heard him say that Xiaoyi was introverted and was often bullied before. I thought back to the girl who had a look of despair in her eyes.

How could it be. Xiaoyi greeted me with a smile, I just felt that there was a... 、

Familiarity.

I hugged the drunken Jiezi, and suddenly my back was sweating. The appearance of the little girl in the mutilated memory and Xiaoyi's smiling face gradually overlapped.

I threw him down and ran to the bookcase to take out photos of my childhood spring outing and classmates. When my eyes fell on the girl in the corner, my heart beat fast and clearly.

The lonely little girl's facial features are in great contrast with Xiaoyi.

I slid to the ground with the album in my arms.

I don't feel like I'm redeemed, I just feel more guilty. The girl who was deeply hurt by me once doesn't know what you're doing now, what you're going through. Did he show a lonely and desperate expression again?

We often say that people who don't fit in must have some shortcomings in themselves that lead to such a result. They will laugh at it with impunity, curse it, and even use all the unbearable language to label the isolated person in all sorts of ways. Even if that person is so kind and beautiful. Because of their lack of words, people have become indifferent bystanders, murderers with sharp blades.

Good hearts will surely find a place for them.

For they shine brightly in the midst of ten thousand people.