The moon outside the window is getting rounder day by day, I look out the window and I miss him, more precisely I miss us, I think about the time between us that once seemed less romantic and even a little boring.

I don't know how the person I know is now, I looked at the time, eight o'clock in the evening, he should still be working overtime in the company at this time, right? I wonder if there is still a me in another world, no matter how late he comes back, I still keep the light for him and wait for him silently?

In the past thirteen years, he has been like the sun in my life, like a light that suddenly broke into my dark life, illuminating me and warming me.

Before I met him, I always felt that I was a strong person, and any difficulties could be solved on my own, I didn't like to show the sadness in my heart to others, and I always disguised myself as a happy and heartless person. After getting to know him, I suddenly realized that I didn't have to try to pretend to be strong, and I didn't have to grit my teeth and secretly hold back my tears when I was sad. I could tell him anything, and I felt like I could always grow up like a child in front of him. I was really too dependent on him, and probably because of this, over the years, his reservations about me made me feel more and more that our relationship was asymmetrical, and it also made me more and more insecure. This extreme insecurity even made me lose faith in our future for a while, and I even suspected that maybe what I had with him was just habit, not love.

Even so, when the once vivid he reappeared in front of my eyes, I still couldn't ignore him, and I still wanted to get to know him again. It's just that since the first English class, he has started to ignore me, and always avoids me intentionally or unintentionally.

Although I had two English classes a week, each time for an hour, I was playing the role of a tool man during this hour, and besides, he didn't take the initiative to talk to me for any reason, and the intersection between us was really rare.

Alas, I sighed, remembering the day when he stroked my head as I held him. I was indeed carried away by fear, but I still clearly felt the strangeness of his look at me, no matter how hidden a person's behavior is, his eyes can't deceive people, his eyes are clear...... I can't say that he is full of love, at least he doesn't hate me, and even likes me a little!

How can I sit still and wait for me to die? In the past, I was indeed a very passive person, even if I had staged thousands of active attacks in my heart, I never knew to wait for the other party to take action. Otherwise, maybe I wouldn't have missed Jiang Shu, as soon as such an idea came out, I slapped myself in the face in my heart, which was too self-indulgent.

Anyway, now I don't want to be the self I used to hate. I quickly sorted out the half-written English essay, took out my mobile phone, and dialed Xingfan's phone directly.

Oh my God, what's going on? What's wrong with my heart, why is it beating so fast? I never knew that I could be nervous like this when I called him, I took a few deep breaths and told myself to be calm, I had called this phone thousands of times, there was no need to be nervous, yes, no need to be nervous at all!

I hypnotized myself deeply, and then I heard a beep-tick-tick sound on the phone, and it worked! I gripped my right thumb with my teeth, but I didn't feel the pain. The study hall was so quiet that everyone seemed to be able to hear my panicked heartbeat, and I pretended to cough a few times to make a noise.

The sound continued to reach my ears, maybe only a few seconds later, but at this time it seemed like centuries had passed for me, and I only felt that time had moved slowly as if it had deliberately turned against me, and anxiety had taken over my whole heart, and I felt like two personalities had run out of my body, one hoping that he would answer the phone quickly, and the other earnestly hoping that the person on the other end of the line would never press the answer button.

"Hello?" Just as the two personalities in my body were arguing, a familiar and unfamiliar voice came from the other end of the phone, and there was a slight doubt in the voice.

Suddenly, my mind went blank, and the two personalities that I had been arguing about just now disappeared in an instant. What am I going to say? I felt like everyone was staring at me in unison, waiting to see me make a fool of myself, how could I be so stupid as to call him in the study hall of so many people, am I really crazy?

"Hello?" The other end of the phone tentatively confirmed.

I hurriedly grabbed my school bag and ran away from the study room, and by the time I found no one and picked up the phone again, the other end had already hung up.

I breathed a long sigh of relief, but my heart calmed down, thinking that I was lucky that I didn't speak, otherwise he would know my phone but didn't know what to say, wouldn't it be very shameless? Thinking like this, I feel that I am very ridiculous, how can the mind of a thirty-year-old still derive the reserve of a girl.

I struggled for a long time holding the phone, but I still couldn't escape the urge to call him again, although I didn't have a topic, I just wanted to talk to him, I wanted to hear his voice. So I plucked up the courage to call him again.

Unexpectedly, this time the other end of the phone seemed to know that I was going to call him again, only to beep and quickly connect, only to hear the other end of the phone hesitate but asked softly: "Lin Mu?" ”。

Forest? I held my breath and didn't dare make a sound, except that my heart felt like it was about to jump out of my chest. What the heck? He...... Why did he know it was me? In a panic, I hung up the phone again in a hurry, for fear that he would find out that I had bad intentions for him.

So why the hell did he know it was me? Did he save my phone? Where did he get my number? Could it be that he actually has a crush on me?! Just like when I had a crush on Jiang Shu before, I obviously had turbulent waves in my heart, and I still had to pretend that I didn't care about it on the surface?

No, no, his attitude towards me obviously doesn't look like he has a crush on me, and he even has some disgust, so what is the reason for secretly saving the phone number of a person he hates? I imagined a hundred reasons in my mind, but I never thought it would be what I later knew.

I pretended to be reading the newspaper in the window in front of the downstairs of the dormitory where he was, and looked at the door of their dormitory with my back bent, thinking that maybe at this time, he would just be back to the dormitory.

I looked around, although the lights were dim, but in case I ran into an acquaintance or was taken as a voyeur is also a very unsightly thing, not to mention, I am now a school celebrity, although it is not a thing to show off, but at least I can't make myself more conspicuous, so low-key is the first important thing, so I took out a book from my bag as a cover.

"Is the board good?"

"Yes, it's okay." I didn't even look at the other person and started talking nonsense.

"You can see it when it's so dark?" As he spoke, he came up to me and blocked my view.

"Yes, I have good eyesight." I bypassed him and continued to peek.

"Anglo-American literature? You're a good book, why don't you lend me a look? As he spoke, he reached out and snatched the book from which I covered my face.

"What are you doing, don't rob it!" As soon as I looked up, he and I called each other's names almost at the same time.

Yang Eun Yue! This plague god is really everywhere!

"You, you, you, I said, who is sneaking around here in the middle of the night, it turns out to be you...... Women have come to peep at our tree again. He smirked, as if I had been caught by him.

"I'm me, I'm peeping at Jiang Shu? You're sick, you! Besides, it's not even nine o'clock, and it's still midnight, do you want to be so exaggerated! "When I saw him, I didn't get angry.

"I'm not angry, and you're angry? Are you still angry? , I'm telling you, I know everything, you watery poplar, a woman in the twilight! He didn't give up.

"What do you know? Where am I water-based poplars, morning and evening? Are you sick? If you are sick, you should go and treat it, and don't get in the way of your eyes. As I spoke, I pushed him who was blocking my eyes and hindering me from looking at Xingfan.

"You, you, you woman, our family tree doesn't think about tea and rice for you, can't sleep at night, even knows that you have escaped from class, you are good, turn around and throw yourself into the arms of others, I have always treated you as a sister-in-law before, I am simply blind! It's just that I pity our family tree, and every day I sigh on the balcony, and even ...... I've even written it in a diary, hey~ It's terrifying! As he spoke, he touched his arms with both hands, as if he had goosebumps.

Diary? How is it a diary again? I slowly typed a question mark in my heart and asked, "Jiang Shu, he also writes a diary?" ”

"Do you know how to care about trees?" I looked at me with disgust and said, "What kind of diary does a big man write?" It's strange here, although the tree has some unspeakable sorrow in his heart, he has always played ball and brushed questions, and I have long been used to it. But! He suddenly looked at me viciously, "Ever since you appeared, he has become abnormal, often rummaging through a diary with him, and not knowing what secret he has. ”

So what secrets are hidden in the so-called Jiang Shu's diary in Yang Enyue's mouth?

"Are you deaf or dumb? Why don't you speak? Are you saying it's your fault? He continued to pester.

"I ......" I was speechless for a moment, thinking that I couldn't tell him clearly, so it would be better to go back to the dormitory first.

Shen Xingfan's mood: Why did she call me so early today? But why is it hanging again?

Yang Enyue's mood: What does the tree want her? Figure She has a problem with her brain? Figure She is entangled with Shen Xingfan? If so, the intricacies of the relationship are really messy.