What a terrible and sad thing it is when a person starts talking to himself, struggling with himself, and waiting for his own response.

This means that this person has been abandoned by the world, and I admire that I am still alive at this time.

I came to this city, I saw the people I wanted to meet, hahaha, or twice, completely beyond my previous expectations, if I really did it as a friend, a tourist, I should be very happy and satisfied now, but now I have made myself so lonely.

I can only think of three words to describe myself.

After all, I still lived as I hated, and I couldn't move myself to the point of self-sensation, sunrise and sunset, pacing back and forth in this place, listening to the announcements in the station, watching the people in the station, listening to all the sounds of the city, all the way to come, just for this I was really interesting.

I wander like a wandering ghost in the early hours of the night, where the road is, I will move forward, I have no destination, the cold wind and dim lights are the only things I am happy about, because they make me less lonely, time has become meaningless to me, even life, I know walking, I have really been abandoned by this world, I can only listen to your voice, feel your feelings, I am just a cold thing, no life, the meaning of existence is meaningless, like that garbage dump, One more piece of trash, no one will be surprised.

I didn't stop until I hit the streetlight, I don't know where I was, how long I had been walking, the moon and stars were still hanging high, and they seemed to be laughing at me.

Instead of stopping at the ridicule, I began to walk back, just as I had come.

I finally returned to my lodgings before I was exhausted, and the moment the lights came on, I completely walked out of the chaos.

I began to return to normal human thinking and began to face up to today's perfect second meeting.

The reason for my huge struggle, I finally knew what it was, I felt left out and didn't care, and I became a passerby from beginning to end, everything was self-inflicted.

It turns out that the real me cares so much about this girl's every move, even if it is a small detail, I am so sensitive,

Looking at the screen full of contacts, I slid up and down on her ID, I don't know what I want to do, do I want to give her another 99+?

Not to mention a word, even a symbol, an expression, I feel that I can't do it.

Maybe she's having fun with her friends right now, maybe I'll disturb her, sending a message in the middle of the night, who do I think I am? Put away that damn thought.

Finally I stopped struggling and began to enjoy this beautiful and quiet midnight.