Chapter XI

Midnight dreams. He had also seen Yi'er's face. The face that always looked at himself with a gentle smile was full of incomprehension and complaint.

For the first time. Yi'er in a dream. Nothing was said to him.

Do you regret it. Repentant......

But think of the consequences if the kid said those things. He was determined to continue to give her the 'medicine'.

He watched her weaken day by day. Yi'er's expression in the dream also became more and more solemn. Wait until later. Yi'er never appeared in his dreams again.

The boy finally got tired......

in the mansion he gave her. Quietly closed the big eyes like Yi'er.

The fourth son, Yinzhen, knelt on the ground and begged him to bury the child in his mausoleum. His first reaction was disagreement. But looking at Yinzhen's grief. He suddenly remembered when Yi'er left. Own heartbreak.

Nodding helplessly. This unruly thing should have been ordered.

Looking at the once lively and lovely 'girl'. Now I am even thinner than I was a few years ago, lying in bed. Stopped breathing forever. His heart will break......

That night. He dreamed of Yi'er. This time. Yi'er was in tears. Kept looking at him without saying a word. The blame, the sigh, the questioning in the eyes. Silently, like a dagger cut through his heart. He cried in his dream: Yi'er. Forgive me. Forgive me. Yi'er ...... I do not know. That's how it will be......

A few days after that. He never dreamed of her again.

And the next two years. See each other in every dream. She looked at him like that without saying a word. The look. He was almost swallowed by his own guilt......

Once again when you plan to travel far away. He dreamed of Yi'er. The dimples at the corners of her mouth finally smiled again. He held out his hand. But I couldn't touch her anyway. He sighed in his dream: Yi'er. Even in dreams. Won't you let me take you into your arms again? Forgive me. Forgive me. Forgive me one more time. I'll listen to whatever I say in the future......

Wake up the next day. He received a letter from the Emperor. The letter said. He will be saved by a 'girl'. He's going to bring her back. Named the princess of Gulun Protectorate.

He read the letter. In fact, I already felt in my heart who the letter was talking about. She didn't die. She didn't even die. Shocked. His heart rejoiced. He can finally say to Yi'er in his dreams: Our child is fine.

That night. He dreamed of Yi'er. After a few years. Finally. In a dream. He took her into his arms.

However, he is always more complicated than he thinks. When I saw the figure of the 'girl' who 'shot' the wolf in front of me with an arrow and then rode away. He sighed in his heart. Confused. But he was a little angry.

It was the anger of an emperor whose authority was offended.

Dark Guard for the past few years. I carried him all the time. Still working for her. And in the last few years. Her true news has been guarded by them all along.

As a father. He was proud that she had such loyal subordinates. As an emperor. He resented these things as betrayal.

Really see her. He was even more emotional.

She looks much healthier. than when she closed her eyes quietly on the bed. Much healthier. She's no longer scary to be skinny. The complexion of the face is also ruddy. He was relieved. And he saw her in rough clothes; My fingers and skin are much rougher. In the end, the wind is strong on the grassland. It's hard and hard. She's suffered a lot. He was distressed......

But wait until the two of them sit down. Only when they are. But he couldn't say a good word.

He really wanted to hold the poor child in his arms. Ask her if she has suffered a lot. Why did the fingers grow a thin callus? Why......

But he couldn't say it. He really couldn't tell......

She seemed to be a different person. No more dodging. Instead, he straightened his back. Gaze intently at your gaze. Angry. He grew in admiration for her. Such a child. is the good 'daughter' who loves Xinjue Luo Xuanye. Courage and knowledge. Courageous. Neither humble nor arrogant. Don't hold back.

Take her back to camp. Even Liang Jiugong seemed to be a little radiant when she was sure she wasn't a ghost. If there is anyone who really hates her presence. That's probably only Prince Yinren.

Sometimes he really can't figure it out. Why can't Yinren tolerate her so much.

If only there weren't so many problems between them. Maybe he doesn't have to be so embarrassed as an Amma.

Take her out hunting. He thought she had changed a lot. I won't be as compassionate as a little bodhisattva like before.

But I saw that she hit Yinren regardless of it. When he pounced on that sad doe. He suddenly discovered. He was wrong. She's still the one with compassion.

She took his hand. The calloused fingertips took his old hand, which was gradually covered with age spots, and 'touched' the doe's belly. Sudden fetal movements. Softened his cold and hard imperial heart.

But why is Yinren so disappointing? Why is there no compassion? He even brutally kicked the boy in the chest. Watch her prostrate on the ground. The blood at the corners of his mouth was so glaring.

He allowed her to take the doe back. I can't see the blush at the corners of her mouth. He took Yinren and rode back first.

Afterwards. She also returned to camp. Everything that has been developed after the diagnosis and treatment of the Tai Doctor. It was all out of his mind. Yinren has no repentance at all. Even looked like he wanted to strangle her.

Of course he knew that the kid was deliberately using words to 'provoke' Yinren. But this is 'stirred' up with emotions. Look at why it feels so real in my eyes.

Three days of closed 'doors' to think. He hoped he would have some introspection. But three days later. Yinren almost strangled his lost 'daughter' in front of him.

He thought he had been scolded. punished. Yinren won't do anything to her anymore. Didn't think about it. He did it to her again.

Disappointed. Utterly disappointed......

I feel sorry for the child. is also resentful of Yinren's incompetence.

Abolish the prince again. It doesn't seem like a surprise.

After returning to Beijing. The Queen Mother put her arms around the child. He had already figured out what he had said on the way. But understanding is understanding. Soon. He began to feel sorry for his only doting son all these years.

Right now. Someone asked for the appointment of a prince. That's at this time. The court began to spread the good of the prince's dragon and yang.

Maybe it shouldn't be said that Longyang is good. It should be said that it is cruel and unjust......

Should I say it out of remorse for not being able to teach me? Still unwilling, or even just self-esteem. He summoned the boy into the palace. Ask if she's playing tricks on all this.

But she looked up. Told the truth that he had never dared to admit... Yinren's today. He did it all by himself. It's his doting. Ended up ruining him......

watched the child be led away by the Queen Mother. He was suddenly a little happy. Fortunately, the Queen Mother came in time. Didn't let yourself cause a catastrophe......

Slump down on the edge of the bed. He looked at the empty imperial study. Asked softly, "Yi'er. What the hell is wrong with me?" Tears welled up in my eyes. How he wished she could be by his side at this time. Tell him. What the hell is wrong with him. Give him a little courage. Let him admit his mistakes. So that he can go and apologize to their children......

But she's not there. Yi'er is not there......

Even in dreams. She just looked at him sadly. Leaning gently into his arms as before. But he didn't speak......

A year has passed. He still didn't have the courage to say a word to the kid. I didn't have the courage to apologize to her.

Their father-daughter relationship. Not even a superficial article. They avoid each other. Ignore each other. He couldn't apologize. She doesn't want to compromise on herself anymore.

Liang Jiugong persuaded several times. But their father and daughter are still like this.

Watching Liang Jiugong secretly give her the best first. He didn't stand in his way. It's tacit.

But finally. Liang Jiugong interceded for Yinren again. It's not that he doesn't understand. Liang Jiugong is just getting old. I can't bear to watch the child grow up. But what else can be done? He already understood by this time. Yinren is definitely not the son who can be entrusted to Jiangshan. Even if it's to kill the 'chicken' and make an example of the monkey. Take Liang Jiugong to open the knife. No one will risk this in the future......

And after a long time. She was finally willing to come to the Qianqing Palace. Requested. It's just to see the one who is now convicted. The old eunuch that everyone avoids.

What is compassion. This child is the most merciful ......

When Liang Jiugong was still in holy grace. I don't see how close she is. Only occasionally when Liang Jiugong is sick. She would silently let people cook porridge in the kitchen. Occasionally, it seems casual to say, "Don't be too tired. Anda."

Now. He was convicted. Got out of jail. She was indeed the only one who asked to see him.

Go for it, go for it. Even if it's for him. Liang Jiugong has been with him for the rest of his life. Now like this. He was also troubled.

It's winter. It's cold. After she sent someone again. Not a few days. The eunuch below said back and forth. Liang Jiugong cut himself......

He looked at Wei Zhu's expression beside him. Look at Liang Jiugong's apprentice Xiao Shunzi's expression again. I remembered the way the boy came to me to ask for a request. Can't help but sigh.

Liang Jiugong left a suicide note. Finally speaking. It's just that I'm still thinking about the gap between myself and the child. In his suicide note, he asked for the finger that he had given him the year he ascended the throne to the child. He agreed......

And then to the 'spring' day. She suddenly entered the palace in the middle of the night. Please go out of the palace. She said. The emperor may not be able to do it.

A month later. She's back. Brought back the news of the death of the emperor. He slumped in the dragon chair. Feeling lonely. Feel this 'spring' day. It's cold......

He 'provoked' her. At least when his Emperor Ama left. With her by your side.

But the relationship between their father and daughter. It's still the same as before. Nothing has improved......

Until the Queen Mother became seriously ill. Holding their hands as they leave. Let them reconcile......

And then. The Queen Mother is gone. The last man in the world who loved him most and truly is gone. He was finally shattered by loneliness. One night grew old.

Kneel in front of the spirit of the emperor who has loved her all her life. He was finally willing to say that. What I've always wanted to say to this kid.

He said he's sorry. But she didn't respond. He doesn't blame her. I hurt this kid too deeply and too badly. At this time. He just wanted to get all those words out there. Speak up. His heart seemed to be less panicked......

Listening to Kangxi Ye finish saying all this. I'm on my knees. Looking down at the cold floor tiles in front of him: "You mean. Me and Empress Hyo Yi In. Looks alike. You mean. I'm in your heart. It's always been you and her child. You mean. You've always wanted to apologize to me. But I can't say it. You mean. You really never really wanted to kill me."

"Bang ......"

Kangxi's tears fell. Smash on the icy floor tiles. Broken into tiny pieces of moonlight: "Yes...... The child ...... 'jade' ice ...... Forgive Amma......"

He used "Amma" instead of "Huang Amma". Two thoughts in a fight. One said to me, "Forgive him. Father and daughter don't have an overnight feud." Another said, "Don't trust him. He's not your father."

Ultimately. I looked up. He let out a long sigh: "Emperor Ama. I want to give my grandmother a wake for a year. A year later. If I come back. That's where I forgive you. If I can't. Then I'll leave. Far away from ......."

Kangxi Ye shouted: "No. Boy.' Jade' ice. The wake is too bitter. You're a 'girl' child. How can you suffer like that? You are not willing to forgive Amma. OK. But don't suffer like that. Okay?"

I shook my head. Looking at the coffin behind the spiritual position: "Huang Ama. Do you know. Forty-six years since coming here. This decade. Only the Imperial Grandmother has always loved me. Only she never doubted me. Never hurt me. Only her. I've always been watching over me. Always loved me all the time. If there is anyone in this world worthy of my wake. This man only has the Imperial Grandmother. Don't say lose the Zunhua Guardian. Let me kneel before her spirit for a year. I'm willing to ......."

Kangxi Ye finally compromised: "Okay. If you must go. Then go for it...... It's just a child. Be sure to come back. Whether you can forgive me or not. Definitely coming back......"

A few days later. Let me obey the holy decree of the Guardian of the Spirit. I'm a vegetarian. Sit in your room and pack up the sutras that you are going to take with you to read.' The door was suddenly pushed open. Squeak.

"Lan Yue. Harleen. Hurry up and pack your things. Take the cuteness well. Don't let it run around. I have to think about who to entrust Meng Meng to."

The words went out. But no one responded.

I looked up. I saw the fourth master wearing a silver-gray robe. The cuffs and neckline are trimmed with a small fox fur trim. Covered with a black 'colored' gauze coat.

"Fourth Brother ......" saw him. My heart warmed a little. I haven't shed a tear in days. Suddenly, he stood up and threw himself into his arms. Crying loudly: "Fourth brother."

He always guards me warmly and with an open arms for me. Comforting softly: "Good. Don't cry anymore...... Grandmother doesn't want you to be so uncomfortable."

I cried and shook my head in his arms: "I know...... But I couldn't help ......"

"Hey......" he sighed, "then cry. Let's cry bitterly. It's okay to cry bitterly. Crying this time. I can't cry anymore......"

I nodded. No more repression. In his arms, he released his long-suppressed emotions.

in his arms. I don't have to hide it. I don't have to force myself to be strong. He won't dislike me. He will love me. will protect my occasional vulnerability......

"Fourth brother. Never leave me......"