Do I like swimming?

Lin Weizhong's unintentional questioning set off a storm in my heart for a while.

I couldn't control the image of the summer vacation when I was in the third grade of elementary school.

On that day, it was very hot, and Zhizhi was screaming desperately, and the ground seemed to be on fire.

I made an appointment with a few classmates to sneak away to swim in the big river in front of the village at noon under the scorching sun.

When I came back, my buttocks were drawn by my father with a belt, and I didn't dare to sit down for several days, and I had to be careful to lie on my stomach when I slept.

At that time, I neither cried aggrieved about my father's "atrocities", nor did I hate them deeply.

Now that I think about it, I'm amazed at how sensible I was at just 11 years old.

I understand my father, he lost his mother when he was a child, and he was afraid that I would be in danger of losing my mother.

After the fight, my father didn't speak all night, just blindly smoked his Xiangyang cigarette, and his eyes slowly swept over the frame containing his mother's portrait from time to time.

Or did I tell my father, Dad, it doesn't hurt, Dad, it really doesn't hurt at all...... I haven't swam much since.

I was the only one of my buddies in middle school who didn't know how to swim.

How to answer him? Repeat the story above?

I can't say it, and I don't want to say it.

This is a secret that belongs to me and my old father, and I don't want to pick it up.

When I thought of my old father, who was lying on the hospital bed, a heart-wrenching pain came to me.

Glancing at Mr. Lin, who was looking at me with a confused expression, I didn't give any explanation, and replied simply and a little indifferently: "I don't know how to swim, I like it and I don't like it, that's all." ”

Then, quickly getting dressed, and running out of the bathroom without looking back, avoiding Lin Weizhong as if fleeing.

Taking the elevator to the ward on the sixth floor, I asked my father what he wanted to have dinner, probably because he was worried that I was too tired, my father hesitated for a moment, and finally smiled and said to me, "Let's eat in the hospital cafeteria, it's pretty good." ”

I walked up to my father, picked up the thermos cup on the bedside table, and looked into my father's eyes with a smile: "Dad, I know you like to eat three fresh noodles, so I'll go and order it for you." Don't worry, it's time to train your legs! ”

Without waiting for my father to say anything, I immediately pushed the door open and went out.

After a while, I bought three fresh noodles, and I poured the thermos into the bowl and handed it to my father, who ate it very deliciously.

After my father finished eating, I packed up the dishes and chopsticks and went to the bathroom to rinse, then took the bedpan to the toilet to rinse, and then helped my father to lie down, and then took the laundry basin and clothes to the bathroom. When all was done, I sat down on the empty bed and looked at the bed opposite.

I saw Mr. Lin's familiar eyes, he was staring at me, I don't know how long he had been paying attention.

Maybe I had a good idea, but I felt as if he was winking at me. So we went up to the balcony of the ward, and he asked if I had time to go outside tonight to talk, and I said yes so happily.

Is this what I have always hoped for and loved? But why do you regret it after you say yes?

Walking in front of my father, I discussed with my father, without a trace of confidence: "Dad, I want to go outside with Uncle Lin opposite tonight, okay?" ”

There was a bright smile on his father's face: "Let's go shopping, the air in the ward is not fresh, just come back early." ”

So I smiled and went downstairs with Mr. Lin, and we both tacitly took the stairs instead of choosing the elevator. As soon as I got out of the staircase, a cool breeze blew all over my body, and I couldn't help but shake a few times, and a strong arm put around my shoulders and wrapped me in the arm bay.

I leaned against his bulging chest and was held by his side.

Time froze, everything stopped, only the hot breath he exhaled tickled in my ears, and the smell of his body made me feel a desire that kept germinating, and I was almost overwhelmed. Close to his arm, I did feel a sense of steadiness that I had never felt before, and he hugged me tighter and tighter.

I was fascinated by the warmth and happiness brought to me by the body temperature of the man next to me.

My heart called.

Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!

How I want to be held by you like this, how I want to lean on you forever!

When I knew that I was not my father's biological son, I looked forward to the day when I could find you!

Thank God for letting me see you!

After seeing you, I finally understood my hunger!

Like a traveler looking for water in the desert, I need your hug so much!

Hold me tight, Daddy! Hold me tight, Daddy!

However, there seemed to be a huge external force bursting from the depths of my soul.

Suddenly, I resolutely broke free from his arm.

From where I came from, where I went, my place should be that Chujiazhuang, and it should be the father who raised me to grow up!

It should be the father who is lying on the sixth floor, full of sideburns and frosty hair!

He took a deep breath, and his mind calmed down as if he had been disturbed by a sudden wind.

I quietly looked at the man in front of me, who was as tall as myself, and reached out my right hand to pat him on the solid back.

After a quick intimate contact with him, I calmly asked, "Are you cold?" I'm young, I'm in good health, it's okay. ”

It's really cool outside.

In the middle of June, there is a bright moon shining over Binjiang City, and you can vaguely see the silhouettes of many buildings around. The sky really resembles a huge yurt, radiating a vast dark blue glow under the glow of the full moon. Standing on the hospital's vast parking lot, with your back against the steel frame guardrail, looking up at the sky, the entire Milky Way is suspended in the universe.

I'm reminded of the fairy tale description when I was a kid.

Those stars are really like diamonds on blue velvet, they sparkle, as if many eyes blink and blink, revealing infinite mystery and magic. It's been years since I've seen anything like this, right? Is that what I saw when I lay down on the threshing floor with my father?

The parking lot was sparsely populated and silent, so quiet that you could hear your own heartbeat and the sound of the air flowing softly in your ears, and there seemed to be a whistle in the distance.

He stood next to me, also looking up at the sky.

He and I both laughed, as simple as the stars in the sky, as crystal clear as the moon.

As he spoke, he stroked my cold hand: "Is it cold?" It's going to be a little warmer. ”

I tried to pull my hand, but another strange force shattered the thought.

My right arm rested against his thick chest, and I was already intoxicated by the feeling of serenity and steadiness.

To be honest, since my mother left, I have often sat or woken up at night, and I have never experienced such a sense of peace and ground.

Another cool breeze blew, and I seemed to regain consciousness from my thoughts.

I pulled out my hands and smiled at him, "I'm sorry, but in front of you, I seem to have become a child." Oh, and can I ask you a personal question? ”

"Ask, as long as it can be answered." He laughed a few times, and his eyes were filled with a kind light.

"Can you tell me," I paused deliberately, I didn't want to be so dull and make some waves, "how old are you?" ”

He knocked me on the head a few times, and then a deep and masculine voice sounded in my ears: "I was born in 51, how old do you say I am this year?" ”

"I can't figure out such a difficult math problem!"

I was really caught up in a much more intense struggle in my heart, and I had no intention of coping with his words.

Oh my God, he's only forty-seven years old, and my late mother is nearly seventy, isn't that my mother my mother?

Who is the mother? Who am I, who is I, Chu Mingxi?

Perhaps seeing the instant change in the expression on my face, he asked me with concern, "Did you stay here for a long time and the cool breeze blew for a long time?" Or what's on your mind? ”

"No. I was thinking that we had talked so much in such a short period of time that we had become friends for the rest of the year. Maybe you don't think so, but I've identified you as a friend. I shook my head and stared into his eyes, my tone calm and leisurely, "But strange to say, I listen to you." It seems to me that what you said makes sense, and it speaks to my heart. This is something that has never happened before. ”

He smiled happily again: "Is it, so amazing? Then I'll say a few more words about you. ”

After a pause, he continued: "Xiao Chu, it is inevitable that there will be some setbacks and difficulties in life, work, and family, and the key is not to lose confidence in the future, life, or even yourself. We must not deny everything because of one person or something, and be negative and pessimistic. You're so young, so smart, so talented, I think, you must remember Shelley's poem, right? ”

"I know, winter has arrived, will spring be far away?" I took it as I could.

"The spring of your life has just begun." He patted me on the back forcefully, and his voice loudly tapped the night sky, "I firmly believe that your future is bright and your life is beautiful!" ”

He spoke so emotionally, so earnestly, with kindness, kindness and encouragement in his eyes, and the big hand patting my back came with the affection of the pulse, and suddenly I had an urge to cry in his arms.

However, I forcibly suppressed the impulse, and I straightened up and turned to face him.

Stretching out my hands, I gently hugged his body: "Thank you, big friend. I will always remember what you said. ”

Then we walked shoulder to shoulder to the patient's quarters, and as we went downstairs, we did not take the elevator, and slowly climbed from the first floor to the sixth floor, and the impression seemed that the time to climb the stairs was shorter than the elevator.