I drove to the hospital with the children and Lin Jia. In the elevator in the garage, I looked at Lin Jia, "You send the child up, my appearance is not suitable." ”

Lin Jia looked at me, nodded and didn't speak.

I put on my sunglasses to cover my big dark circles, and went to the department depressed.

Soon received a message that it was Lin Jia, "The child has been delivered, don't worry, don't read it, it's all right." ”

There is no nickname that I once had a friendly name, there is no name for me, a few simple words seem to be the completion of the task, at this moment, the heartbeat suddenly accelerated, I know, I am a little anxious. From the drawer of the locker closet, take out a pill and put it in your mouth.

"Xia Fei?" At the end of the morning meeting, the head nurse stopped me.

"Your hands?"

I looked at my gauze-wrapped hand and smiled, "Thank you head nurse for your concern, it's okay." He turned around and prepared to leave.

She stopped me again, "If you're not feeling well, just rest, you can take the emergency room." ”

"No need, let's work, after all, there are not enough people." I turned to leave, and indeed, I was very unhappy with the head nurse letting me go back to work.

Although I used to take time off to rest, I usually work a lot of overtime, and the accumulated overtime time is more than enough for three months off. Not only that, because it is a teaching hospital, there are no longer a few nurses who come from the lower level hospitals for further study every year, and it is normal for everyone to take turns in the lounge on weekdays, but she is difficult for me when I am in trouble.

"Xia Fei."

The head nurse called me from behind, so I left the conference room as if I didn't hear me.

"What's the matter with you?" The head nurse doesn't pay attention to what you call you.

"There's nothing I want to say about it, it's just those few polite words, I'm tired of hearing it, so just pretend I can't hear it and hide it."

"Aren't you afraid that she will give you little shoes to wear?"

"It's just that you don't want to rest, how can you wear small shoes? The management of the promotion title is not under her control, let the staff on duty rest, I go to work overtime for surgery, and arrange two more surgeries for me every day, isn't this the ability? "With the nameless fire of last night, I suddenly felt that I could go crazy for a while, so my head was hot, and I said anything, and I was not afraid at all.

"Sister, be quiet." Jingxin hurriedly covered my mouth.

I smiled coldly, "If you have the ability, let her hand me over, I don't want to do it here." Damn, my mother is sick and can't wait, my child is hospitalized and can't ask for leave, the patient is God, now my mother is hospitalized, my child is sick, they live in this hospital, and it is also my God! ”

I shook off Jing Xin's hand and left distraught.

My fire was not spread to Jing Xin, but it innocently affected Jing Xin, so, after taking the instrument and picking up the patient, I saw Jing Xin and pulled Jing Xin aside.

"That, Jingxin, I'm sorry for what happened just now, I didn't ...... for you"

"Look at your stupid look, of course I know you're not aiming at me, don't say such things to me, I don't want to hear sorry from you."

"Jingxin ......"

"Okay, what do you mean by a friend, can't you let you spread evil fire when you are aggrieved in your heart?"

Suddenly, his heart sank, and he nodded at Jing Xin, to be honest, he was indeed not in the state today.

In the middle of the surgical reception table, Jing Xin and I stayed in the chairs in the patient hall and waited to pick up the patient.

I leaned on Jing Xin's shoulder, and a wave of sadness suddenly hit, and I stared straight at the wall, "Jing Xin?" ”

"What?"

"I'm sad in my heart, but I can't say what I'm sad about, I just can't control my desire to cry." As he spoke, tears flowed down the corners of his eyes to Jing Xin's clothes.

"Mom, you're too ready-made, just cry." Jing Xin hurriedly took out the paper to help me wipe my tears.

In the patient hall, the patients who took the surgery came out and went in, and from 10 to 11 o'clock in the morning, when the hall was the busiest and most crowded, I just cried without warning in this hall.

Jing Xin took out a tissue to wipe my tears, hoping to stabilize my emotions before being seen.

"Don't cry, Xia Fei, what do you have to tell me."

"Don't cry, don't cry."

I sobbed, "Jingxin, I don't cry, I'm brave, but I don't understand why I can't stop crying." ”

I went from sobbing to crying, and a man who was almost 30 years old sat in the patient hall and cried without shame, and the patients waiting for surgery around me heard the crying and immediately whispered.

Because I was here, it was easy to affect the patient's mood, so Jingxin pulled me to the sterile instrument room across the wall from the patient hall.

"My eldest sister, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"I don't want to cry, but I can't stop, I keep crying, I don't want to cry, I don't want to do this, I don't ...... I know it's humiliating."

I sobbed, my shoulders shook, Jing Xin saw me like this, and knew that it was impossible for me to perform the next surgery, so he took out his mobile phone and dialed the head nurse, "Hey, head nurse......"

Jing Xin roughly told the head nurse about the situation here, because everyone knew that I had depression, so they immediately stopped me and Jing Xin from having surgery, replaced me with another person to take over the operation, and let Jing Xin accompany me until I was in a better mood.

After an hour, not only did my mood not improve, but because of the release, I couldn't stop at all.

Haozi took advantage of the patient's anesthesia to come to the instrument room, and as soon as he entered the door, Jingxin made a look at him.

Haozi lowered her head and frowned when she saw me curled up in the inner teleportation chamber.

"What should I do, do you want to inform Lin Jia?"

"Don't tell Lin Jia!" This sentence was like an electric shock, and I instantly stood up and looked at Haozi, "Don't tell Lin Jia Did you hear it?" ”

"Okay, okay, you steady, you take a deep breath, don't get excited, I won't tell Lin Jia." Hiroko held out her hand and motioned for me to steady.

I muttered to myself, "Don't tell Lin Jia, I don't want him to see this embarrassed me." ”

Haozi looked at Jing Xin, and Jing Xin shook his head. She closed the door of the inner room, and the comrades from the province who came to get the equipment saw me.

"I resolutely can't tell Lin Jia, I can't let him see this me, I can't let him see this me, I took medicine in the morning, I'm not mentally ill, I'm not sick, I just can't control myself."

I stood up and slammed the door open, and Jing Xin, who was guarding the door, was really startled, "What's wrong, Xia Fei?" ”

"You must not tell Lin Jia," I shook Jing Xin's shoulder.

Jingxin nodded vigorously, but the shrunken pupils let me see her fear.

"Are you afraid of me," I tilted my head and asked with a stunned look in my eyes, "Jingxin?" Are you afraid of me? ”

"No, I'm not afraid, but Xia Fei, you, calm down." At this moment, Jing Xin was already a little unfavorable to speak.

"Jing Xin. Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you, I just can't control my own sadness. I took medicine in the morning, when I didn't feel well, I already took medicine, I also took medicine last night, but this medicine, it didn't work. Why do I still want to cry after eating? Why am I still sad? Why am I still sad! ”

I sat down on the floor with my hair clutched, still muttering to myself, "Isn't it me at this point, I don't look pretty at all, I'm not cool at all, right, right!" ”

I suddenly yelled at Jing Xin, then covered my head and squatted on the ground and cried.