"It's Miss Three. Alas... Madame went early, or the master wouldn't-"

"Do you want someone to follow? The child is so young, nothing will happen, right? ”

"Then you follow, how can a child look at people as cold as her? If you want to go, I won't go. ”

…

Ever since I was a child, I've heard these words a lot since I had to look up at the adults, and I kept talking in my ears. Whenever I looked at them one more time, or took an extra step toward them, they would take a step back or pretend not to see it and do something else.

I looked at myself in the mirror and the dark shadows around me, and thought to myself. It was a long time before I realized that they couldn't see that, and they avoided me for another reason.

One day, the man who claimed to be my father was in a hurry to call a doctor because I didn't speak. Seeing that he really didn't know and was worried about me, I opened my mouth rarely: "No, I'm fine, I don't need to ask a doctor." ”

As if startled by me, he and the others were stunned for a moment before coming to their senses, looking me up and down, and then breathing a sigh of relief.

"It's okay, it's okay. I didn't expect our A-Ning to speak so clearly, very smart! Looks like Daddy is going to consider hiring a teacher for you? ”

Aside from my mother and nurse, he was probably the first person I remember who was close to me. After I was weaned, the nurse moved out of the yard, and it had been a long time since anyone had come so close to me.

Although the man was haggard, white as paper, and thin and weak, the palm on top of my head was large enough to cover most of my head. He rubbed the back of my head, and a warm sensation came from the palm of his hand. I heard that he was not in good health, so he didn't come to see me much, and all my food and clothing were given by him - I took his face to heart, this person is my father.

After that, I went out for a walk, and no one followed me as usual. So I'm going to go a little farther away today, and I'm already a little tired of being near my yard.

Walking along the winding cobblestone path, I bent down to take a closer look at the patterns on the stones. I felt that the faint lines and textures were like mountains and seas, and it was quite interesting, and I was fascinated by it for a while, and I didn't notice that I walked to the edge of the path, and my feet were tripped up, and my body was unstable and fell to the side.

Hiss - my hand was on the gravel, and the dense pain was a little irritating, and I couldn't help but frown. I was so focused that I didn't even notice someone not far away. So when he spoke, even if there was no expression on his face, I was still stunned for a moment.

This person... I don't think I've seen it before. The black hair is tied on the top of his head with a crown of hair, the brocade clothes are gorgeous, but the color of the material is not bright, and the snow-blue magnolia embroidery is open on his waist, which makes him quite elegant and elegant of Gaolan Yuzhi, and looks a little like my sister who came to see me before.

He took my hand and looked at it, and saw that the broken skin was oozing blood, so he immediately called the little guy who followed him to prepare the wound medicine and asked me if it hurt. I hesitated, and before I could answer, he picked me up, took me all the way to his own yard, and sat me down on a round bench in his room.

I put my arms around his neck all the way, looking at this strange and somewhat familiar beautiful little brother, and let him hold me and remain silent.

I sat obediently and did whatever he asked me to do. Stretch out your hand to reveal the wound and ask him to carefully clean the wound for me, clean the gravel and sand before applying the wound medicine. He asked me if it hurt, and I shook my head. I saw that the other party looked at me and frowned, and his eyes became a little complicated. Then the movements of his hands became lighter, and he gently blew on the place where the medicine was applied to relieve the pain. The place where the medicine was applied felt cool.

"Next time, if there's anything going on, you'll come to me."

Hearing him say this, I stared at him for a while, and said without malice: "Who are you?" ”

I saw that the smile on the little brother's face froze, and he looked at the little guy behind him and snorted softly. The little guy snorted, swallowed back the laugh that was almost uncontained, and explained to me: "Third Miss, this is the second young master, your own brother. ”

Then he comforted Zhang Tingyu with a smiling face.

Because he emphasized: "Come back to me next time, do you hear?" ”

I didn't have much impression of him before, but I was a little sudden, so I looked at my second brother and asked with some doubts: "Do you want me to come to you?" ”

I was a little happy in my heart, I really asked this, and I also hoped to get a positive answer from the other party. But...

"Who is rare for you to come to find it, you will disturb Young Master Ben's study, do you know?"

… That's right, too.

I was disappointed, and then I thought it didn't matter. My brother, sister, and dad are just busy, and there's no way around it, so it's better not to bother them.

I thought so, what should I do as usual. After three or four days, I didn't expect him to come to the door with the wound medicine, and even the people in the courtyard looked surprised. He glanced at the bandage on my hand, folded his arms in front of him, and said with a "sure enough" expression: "What is this bag?" Ugly is dead. Come here, I'll repack it for you. ”

As he spoke, he sat at the desk in my courtyard, took the white vial handed by the servant, and beckoned me to come over. I looked at the bandages on my hands and thought, "Is it that bad?" I think it's okay. ”

After that, he often passed by my yard, and I couldn't help but wonder: "Second brother... Really busy? "Why don't I think so?

He took me to the mountains to see plum blossoms, saying that the plum blossoms at this time are the most beautiful. I went with him, but it was raining lightly, so I stayed in the carriage. Lifting the curtain to see the wild mountain plum not far away, I guess I was bored, the second brother jumped off the rider with his sleeve to block the rain above his head, and folded a plum blossom and handed it to me.

"Oh, for you, take it."

He climbed into the car, wiped the rain off his body, and said, "Like it?" I like my second brother to give you a birthday gift. ”

I thought he was talking about the one in my hand, so I nodded. But I didn't expect that on my birthday, he dug up the roots of those wild plums and let people transport them to my hospital.

I said, "That's... What to do with the place where plum blossoms were originally planted in the mountains? Are there only a few big pits? ”

Seeing that I lowered his eyes, he touched my head and said with a smile: "Don't worry, my brother asked someone to buy a few new plums for him to make up, and it would be good to grow for a few more years." ”

When I was six years old, my family invited a teacher for me, An Yuanxi.

The oleanders bloomed very well that day, and I sat on the fake stone by the pond to see the carp in the pond and the birds on the beams being distracted, and vaguely seemed to hear someone say: "Although the realm of flowers and birds is good, Miss might as well look elsewhere?" ”

The gentle voice that I had never heard in the house was like a warm spring breeze blowing through the small window. I only heard the subordinate a little embarrassed and said: "Mr. An, the third lady doesn't like to talk, you can take care of it." ”

The man said, "Okay, I understand." ”

Mr. Ann? Did Daddy invite a teacher? When I got up to leave, I glanced at him, cotton robe, long hair half-combed behind the head with a wooden hairpin fixed, every word and deed are slowly flowing with white clouds and leisurely indifference, like the tip of the plum blossoms falling one after another, because of the light smile all the time, it gives people a warm impression.

But... Is it wrong? I don't like the way he looks at me.

The next day, seeing that there was no one in the study, I realized that I might have come early. So I sat by the window and waited for a while, An Yuanxi seemed a little surprised when he came, I glanced at him and didn't say much. I never thought that this person would be a talker.

"What is Miss looking at?"

"Is it flowers, rocks, or sky?"

"Yesterday, I saw Miss sitting by the pool with oleanders in her hands, does Miss like flowers?"

"Sir, I also know a little about flowers and plants, and I like plum blossoms the most. Seeing that there is a plum forest outside the courtyard, does the young lady also like plum blossoms? ”

Why does this person talk so much, and no one annoys him? If everyone was like him, I'd be glad no one paid attention to me, and at least I could rest quietly.

Wait, he's my teacher now, so don't I have to listen to him a lot? Is there any way to do it?

I focused on thinking about this issue, and for a while I put An Yuanxi aside.

"Miss, it's class, can you watch the teacher?"

When I heard this, I turned to look at him, but I saw that he was surprised. What's wrong? Didn't he ask for it? Why did he think it was amazing?

I wonder what was going on in his head at that moment? I saw him muttering for a while, and his tone seemed to be tentative: "Since the teaching of thousands of poems, what does Miss think?" ”

I nodded, what's wrong with that? He's a teacher, and he said it's okay. But he looked very magical, and even couldn't help but nod his head, as if he understood something.

What a strange Mr. Teach.

However, I also found that he didn't interrupt me while I was doing my homework, so I took a pen and copied what he wrote on paper today. I'm very good at concentrating, and An Yuanxi is also very cooperative to watch from the sidelines, without making a sound to disturb.

It's time for lunch.

An Yuanxi Xu saw that I didn't speak, so he made the decision for me. It's just a matter of choosing a place to eat, and I don't really have a problem with it, but is he too proactive with me? No one under the roof with me is like him, or... Am I too careful?

I sat at the table and didn't think about anything, I don't know why An Yuanxi suddenly had to take over someone else's work again, saying something to take care of me. His initiative made me instinctively repulsive, but I thought that maybe I was too sensitive. After all, it was the one chosen by the father, and others didn't think there was anything wrong.

I really realized that An Yuanxi's strange attitude towards me was not an illusion, it was he who blocked the shuttlecock for me. I was ready to be smashed, but a pair of hands came over my waist and took me into his arms to protect me, and he used his own body to take me down.

It's just a shuttlecock, and it can't kill anyone, but if someone replaces me because they're worried, I won't be unappreciative. I thanked him, and then wanted to withdraw from his arms, but An Yuanxi didn't let go. I couldn't help frowning, feeling a little dissatisfied, and when I looked up, I saw him staring at me with burning eyes, and I couldn't help but tremble.

I was still young, and I didn't know what he meant by the way he looked at me, but I felt very repulsed in my heart and wanted to leave immediately. I can't break free, I can only speak.

"Sir!"

An Yuanxi finally came back to his senses, and let go of his hand without me opening his mouth, his eyes were stunned for a moment, and then he flickered with panic, and quickly opened the distance between him and me. turned his back to me for a while, and returned the shuttlecock to the girl who ran over, the movement seemed steady but a little flustered. When he turned to look at me, he looked like he was normal and warm.

I suddenly felt that he was a little scary, but in a few moments his face had changed so much that I couldn't help but suspect that his usual appearance was also pretended by him. So no matter how much he reached out to let me go in a good voice, I didn't hesitate, just turned around and left, thinking that the farther away from him was better.

The next day, An Yuanxi looked as if nothing had happened yesterday, as usual, warm as water, with a spring breeze blowing on his face, and he looked thoughtful. But I was wary of him, and refused to get even half a step closer to him, and the distance between the two of them was less than an arm's length.

I didn't know how to express it, but I subconsciously knew that I couldn't get close to this person anymore. One afternoon, I fell asleep on a rocking chair in the courtyard, faintly feeling a little hot, and then suddenly cooled down again, and woke up to see An Yuanxi sitting on a stool next to me and fanning me for a long time.

Seeing that I was awake, he smiled and said, "Miss is awake?" ”

I woke up and saw him, and I couldn't help but be shocked. How did he get here and when did he come? Seeing the fan in his hand again, remembering the coolness of his sleep, he simply thanked him and got up and went back to the room, and closed the door when he went back.

I don't know what's going on outside, but I heard the female envoy in the courtyard seem to keep saying: "Mr. An, don't worry", "The third lady is still young and ignorant", "Don't care" and so on.

An Yuanxi didn't seem to care, and there was a gentle smile in his voice, and said, "It's okay." ”

Because of my behavior, everyone except me was very embarrassed.

An Yuanxi gave me a holiday today, and I avoided him and was swinging in one place by myself, but I didn't expect to meet my father.

His complexion didn't seem to be the same as the last time I saw him, he was still gray and not very energetic. For some reason, he asked the housekeeper grandfather to bring a pink-and-white checkered cherry blossom pattern hand bow ball and said that he wanted to play with me.

I was more worried about his body than playing, and I heard that my father had been in poor health because he missed his mother, and even the housework and business were gradually handed over to my sister and brother.

I had so much fun that afternoon that I didn't even notice my father's final decision to say goodbye.

When I went to bed at night, I held the ball on the bed and counted the stitches of the cherry blossom embroidery on it by the moonlight, and the corners of my mouth couldn't help but rise, and I said, "Daddy is right, this hand bow ball is really exquisite." ”

“… When will I be able to play with my dad again? ”

I thought about it with my ball in my arms and slowly closed my eyes. After a few days, I looked at the ball and couldn't help but say, "Or... Take the initiative to go to Daddy? ”

Just do it!

Unexpectedly, when I looked for it with the ball, my father was ready to commit suicide. With his back to me, he wiped his neck with his sword in front of me, and with his sword in a dashing and relieved manner, blood swept through the air in the sun, like a phoenix blooming on the curtain beside him.

I came with the ball in my hand in anticipation, but I only heard the sound of the ball falling from my hand to the ground, and all the joy in my heart at that moment turned into pieces, and it was scattered all over the ground with desolation and indifference.

I wanted to save him, but An Yuanxi took me away. For the first time in my life, the initiative ended absurdly.

If you are transparent from the beginning, will you not be disappointed? If I were in control, wouldn't I be at the mercy of others? Won't it be so powerless? If you don't have so many expectations in your heart, you won't be so disappointed in the end?

I used to ask for nothing, and I lived a ridiculous life. I also had hope, but I ended up desolate.

The elder brother said he saw the ball in his father's room, and the housekeeper said that his father gave it to me. Now it's bloody, and I can't play. Ask me what to do.

I said, "That's not my thing, I don't have any balls." Never..."

I'm not rare to lose something.

Since the love and warmth given to me will be taken away one day, then I don't want it. Everything I covet and want, I can get it on my own.