I don't know who my parents were, even if I knew they must be in this world, why did they leave me alone in this little courtyard, restricting my freedom, and taking care of me only by a bunch of unsmiling men dressed in black.

I had no one to talk to, and I didn't know who to laugh at. I was hesitant and scared, who in this world could I rely on?

Even if I want to please, I don't know who it is! I think I have been forgotten by the world, and all that accompanies me is boundless darkness and loneliness.

I'm just a kid who yearns to run in the sun.

My favorite thing is the shadow, it is the only one who speaks to me and will never betray me.

I wonder, what kind of people are my parents? Why don't they want me? Why don't you ever come to see me?

I wanted to see them, but I wasn't sure I could forgive them.

Maybe it's been suppressed for too long, I just want to run away and go to a place where there is sunshine and laughter.

I did escape.

I escaped from that cold yard and went out into the street, where I saw a lot of people and heard a lot of laughter.

But I thought about things too simply, I had no money, I didn't know anyone, I was hungry, I didn't know anything about the world, and no one taught me that I needed money to buy things. I just took a hawker's bun, and the hawker took me for a thief and took me by the hand to see the officer, and I didn't know what to do.

At this time, a child in tattered clothes gave me money for buns, and he looked at me and said, "Are you separated from your family?" ”

I shook my head.

"Running away from home?"

I shook my head and nodded again.

He looked at me with a smile, and his smile made me jealous, and he told me that he could take care of me for the time being, until I figured out that I wanted to go home, and I didn't think I would ever go back to that place.

But before I could enjoy my new life, they found me. They want to kill Nan'er, I won't let me, I said, if he dies, one day I will also want you to die.

I don't know why I say that, but it's so natural. For the first time, the faces of the people in black, who had always been serious, showed cracks, they looked at each other, and in the end, they still didn't hurt Nan'er, this was the first time I protected someone.

After I went back, the men in black treated me a little better, they seemed to be a little afraid of me, am I scary?

That night, a man came to see me, and he said he was the father. I've imagined countless times what my parents would have been like, and it was clear that he was more majestic and handsome than I had hoped, but it was a little different from what I had thought, that is, there was no intimacy as I had imagined.

He said he was going to take me back to my mother.

Actually, I really wanted to ask him why he came to see me now, but I didn't dare, I was afraid of him, and there was no emotion in his eyes when he looked at me.

It didn't occur to me that my imaginary mother was just a cold corpse.

I guess I should have cried, but I really couldn't cry, the woman lying in the coffin was really just a stranger to me.

A very beautiful aunt said that she would take care of me in the future.

I didn't expect that my identity was actually a prince, so why did my father send me outside the palace? I didn't ask anyone, I knew no one would tell me, and I had to find the answers I wanted on my own.

I have an older brother who is weaker than I am, but he loves to laugh, and I think he must have been pampered a lot, but why didn't I get anything? All I got was darkness and cold.

I think I'm still a child who longs to be loved, but my father, his eyes only have my brother, his eyes are only cold when looking at me, but when he looks at my brother, there is a warm light floating, and the woman who keeps saying that she wants to take care of me, although she is not stingy to smile at me, but she can clearly feel that she treats me differently from my brother. My sister, she always looked at me with a look of wariness and disdain, but when she looked at my brother, she had a smile and warmth on her face.

If I had lived in that little courtyard forever, I don't think I would have had so much jealousy and hatred in my heart.

What does life bring me?

Why am I treated differently when I am the same child of my father?

What did my mother die? If my mother were still alive, maybe I would still be able to get a little warmth in my life.

My brother, who was born on the same day as me, treated me very well, and I can say that I don't know what to do, but I just think in my heart that his kindness to me is nothing more than charity. But no matter how resentful and depressed I feel in my heart, I still have to pretend to be lively and simple on the surface.

One day, I was bored wandering around the Purple Palace, and I accidentally walked to the cold palace, where there was a very beautiful woman, and she said that she knew my background.

It turns out that I have such a background, it turns out that I was born to protect another person, why, why. Even my mother died because of that man.

I hate, why is it all this!

The woman told me that she could help me, and that she saw through the darkness in my heart.

I worked with the woman, first using the smoke she gave me to stun the shadow that had been good to me, and then tricked each one into the front of the woman.

Who will Concubine Jin save us? One was her son and the other was the son of a woman who died for her son.

Concubine Jin, she chose to save me first, I saw the disbelief and injury in my brother's eyes in Concubine Jin's arms, I looked at him defiantly, and felt a pleasure of revenge.

In the end, Concubine Jin still didn't save her brother, and her brother was still killed. Looking at his cold corpse, I wondered, is this what I want?

Is it that when he dies, I can get everything I deserve? I never regret my decision.

But in fact, I didn't get everything I wanted, I understood that what I wanted was not the crown prince, I just wanted the warmth that I had never had.

Concubine Jin was sad because of her brother's death, but I didn't want her to really die, because of this woman's relationship, my father would love me a little more. But there is pain in my father's eyes, I want to take my brother's place in his heart, and I just hope that when he looks at me, there will be a trace of warmth.

But no, I didn't get anything.

It's still cold and dark that belongs to me, and it has never changed.

I was afraid to see Danhui's eyes, and every time her clear eyes looked at me, I had the illusion that she had seen through all of me.

She didn't call me brother, she deliberately avoided me every time she saw me, did she know something?

But Concubine Jin is leaving, he is the lubricant between me and my father, as long as she is there, even if the truth is known one day, my father will not kill me, but she is gone, I can't keep her, but I still have to leave people related to her, I left Shuying to take care of me, at least, when my father sees Shuying, he should think of Concubine Jin.

Shuying didn't know the truth, if she knew that I killed my brother, would she want to kill me?

I became the only son of my father, the rightful crown prince, and no one thought that a prince who had been abandoned and neglected would become the future king of Daxiang.

And because my father has an agreement with the eldest princess, I am engaged to the daughter of the eldest princess, this pampered girl, I don't like it at all, but I still have to pretend to like it very much, just because she can bring me the support of the eldest princess.

But life is not without hope at all, my father gave me a companion to read, it was actually Nan'er, the child who once gave me warmth.