1. When my sister-in-law came home from work, my little nephew immediately rushed up and said loudly: Mom, Mom, there are really dragons in the world. My sister-in-law couldn't help but laugh: Where did you know? The little nephew looked proud: Dad said, just now I heard Dad call and say that the one-stop service last time was very good!

2. The head teacher is very shrewd, as long as someone calls to say leave, the head teacher always coldly says: "Make up, you continue to make up." "I'm embarrassed to say any more. I played all night last night, and today I really don't want to go to school, so I called the head teacher and said, "Teacher, I want to make 20 baskets at home, and now I have only made less than half of them, what do you think?" "Edit, you continue to make ......" "Okay!" Hurriedly hang up the phone, turn off the phone and go to sleep.

3. At noon, I was poking the sewer, the takeaway brother sent a chicken cutlet, I was holding a stick in my hand and it was inconvenient to pick it up, so he asked him to put it on the table for me, the takeaway brother: "I used to be a professional in dredging the sewer, I'll help you," said and took out the tools, and it was done in ten minutes, he wiped his sweat and said with a smile: "Leave a phone call for you, and call me next time it's blocked."

4. One day the son asked his father: "How did you catch up with your mother?" Father: "That day I met a couple on the street, the woman was a goddess, the man was a fat man, I was very angry, so I said to her, be my girlfriend, your boyfriend is so ugly!" Son: "I seem to understand something!" Father: "I understand a fart, then I was seriously injured by the fat man, he paid me a sum of money, I used that money to go to the countryside to marry your mother!"

5. If you can't sleep, call your girlfriend: "Honey, I miss you, come and sleep with me at night." Girlfriend: "No, we haven't gotten to that point yet." I threatened, "I can't help it, but I'll look for my little sister." Girlfriend: "Didn't you look for it last night?" Me: "How do you know?" Girlfriend: "I put on makeup last night, you didn't see it." ”

6. My girlfriend's dad asked me out, and after meeting, he pointed to the cash on the table and said, "This is 10 million, please leave my daughter." "I was reluctant to do anything, but I knew it couldn't be changed, so I had to reach for the money. He opened my hand: "What do you want to do? This money is not for you." I just wanted to tell you that we're rich and you don't deserve it!"

7. As soon as I entered the house after work, I saw my daughter-in-law lying on the bed eating bananas, and the sound of running water came from the bathroom.

Me: "Who's taking a shower!"

The daughter-in-law squinted her eyes and said, "Nobody, it's the old Wang's water heater next door that is broken, come to our house to take a bath!"

I was furious: "Okay, you shameless person, I'm not at home, and you did such a thing!"

After saying that, he kicked open the bathroom door, and there was an exclamation inside!

Sister Wang covered her face and scolded: "Stinky and shameless, your daughter-in-law is still there!"

8. When we play with pesticides today, the armor on our side has a kind of red skin. As soon as I came up, I asked us to open the voice, which was convenient for the group. We all opened, and then during the team battle, this guy shouted frantically, "Yanlong armor, fit!"