In the diary, there are occasional essays, occasional fragments of novels, and sometimes scattered pictures.

I went back to the previous post.

No one knows which will come first, tomorrow or the accident..........

In fact, there is a second half of this sentence:

But tomorrow will always come, but if the unexpected comes first, tomorrow will no longer be your tomorrow. It will be everyone's tomorrow, and it doesn't belong to you alone.

We always think that tomorrow is a lot, so much that we don't have to care about when it will suddenly disappear, and we don't have to care about waking up one day that it no longer belongs to us. So, we always squander arbitrarily and ignore it arrogantly.

But when tomorrow becomes scarce and becomes like a source of dryness, do you still treat it as usual? When bad luck suddenly knocks on the door, do you face it bravely or cowardly run away?

I silently erased that sentence, whether tomorrow is an accident or as calm as ever, at least, today's tranquility and throbbing belong only to me.

"Ladies and gentlemen, in two weeks' time, it will be a mock exam. The difficulty of the model will be relatively large, everyone, don't care too much about the final result, just try your best to take the test. ”

Sayuri announces the news of the Ichimo exam from the podium.

"Ah, the exam exam, how can I go to the third year of high school, it's all exams, and it's okay to take the weekly exam and the monthly exam, who invented this model and two models........"

Hao Jianren lay on the table, looking like he had been squeezed dry.

As soon as he said this, I realized that the exams are so frequent now, and I have taken the exams like a wooden man, and I am unconscious.

Zhang Huaixu poked me with a pen.

"The model will be recorded in the total score of the school year, and it will be tested well."

"I got it........"

I was afraid that he would tell me something big, so I tilted my head to the side and closed my eyes quietly.

The warm sunlight shuttles through the breath of the slight gap, soothing, long. The fragrance of red sandalwood permeates the spring day, filling all the emptiness between heaven and earth, and under the sun, it is a delicate dust, whispering innocence, full of the once unfathomable lonely and elegant shadow.

The five senses of the human being are truly amazing, even if you can't see anything, but the sense of hearing and smell are fused together, and you can actually paint a picture in front of your eyes.

I looked at the slit in my eyes and looked back, Zhang Huaixu was no longer there. I boldly opened my eyes and stretched out my hand, as if the sunlight was dancing on the tips of my fingers, and the subtle warmth was infinitely magnified in my fingertips. In fact, sometimes, a little warmth will make a person remember it for a long time.

Not........

There was a sudden cold sensation on his cheeks, and a wet feeling like droplets.

"Don't pretend, you know you're awake." Zhang Huaixu's deep and slightly smiling voice sounded from behind me.

When I looked back at him, he was already seated. In the upper right corner of the table, there is a can of ice Pepsi.

"Coke? How do you know ......."

"A Coke in the refrigerator at home, although I am short-sighted, I am not blind." He pushed the black-rimmed glasses on the bridge of his nose, the pen in his hand spun gorgeously between his slender fingers, but his eyes fell seriously on the set of Olympiad problems.

When we were young, we envied two kinds of people the most, one was someone who could do well without reviewing for exams, and the other was someone who could turn an ordinary pen into flowers.

The sunlight fell obliquely on him, along with my shadow, shining his pupils with a slight amber glow.

His eyes were like the night sky of Namtso, Tibet, even though I had only seen them in books.

The prosperity is gone, a place of smoke and dust, and a slender back that can't be shaken. The Buddha said that looking back in the previous life for 500 years can only be exchanged for a rub shoulder, and the starry sky of Namtso in Tibet is like the shining eyes of lovers.........

"Hey, Zhang Huaixu, have you ever seen the meteor shower in Namco, Tibet?" I asked him with my hands crossed, lying on the table and tilting my head.

"Namco? When I was a freshman in high school, I went with Hao Jianren and them. ”

"Yes, it's our little friend Zhang Huaixu, he has altitude sickness, we went for two days in total, he passed out in that tent for two days, this trip, his memories are all in the car." Hao Jianren suddenly jumped over and hooked Zhang Huaixu's neck from behind, "Hey, you can ask An Yuqiu, she also went with her." Hey, it's good to have a childhood sweetheart, those two days, and An Yuqiu took care of us Lord Zhang so hard, otherwise we would have left him on the Tibetan plateau sooner or later....... Speaking of An Yuqiu, I haven't seen her for so long, I really miss her a little bit.........."

"Cut, you're embarrassed to say ......."

When I heard Hagaoka's name, my heart suddenly tightened, and my limbs felt as if they had been drained of their strength.

After all this time, I have fully integrated into the class, but I forget that I was absent from this team for a whole year. When I listened to them talk about the military training of the first year of high school and where to travel, I could only sit silently and listen, and sometimes, I wanted to interject, but found that I couldn't interject at all. I really want to be the most out of place in the world.

I was also absent from half of An Yuqiu and Zhang Huaixu's lives, and I envy them for being the people who have been with each other the longest..........

I still remember the sentence I erased before: You never know, tomorrow and accidents, that one will come first.

I originally thought that some people's hearts were flat with a bowl of water, whether it was tomorrow or an accident, they could live a dull life, but when the accident really came unexpectedly, no matter how strong a person was, it seemed that they were vulnerable.......

The first model exam passed in a muddy nightmare, and this time, I didn't get into the same exam room with Zhang Huaixu.

Just when I was still reviewing the math problems I had just finished exam, Hao Jianren suddenly ran at me in a panic.

"Tan Lige Tan Lige! Come with me to Sayuri's office. ”

"What's wrong?"

Hao Jianren pulled me and said:

"That's right, when I was taking the math test just now, Sayuri suddenly came to Zhang Huaixu, and then I saw him stumbling outside, Sayuri called him, and he didn't react, I think something happened........."

In the teacher's office, Sayuri was in tears and was making phone calls, and when she saw us coming, she wiped her tears and smiled reluctantly.

"It's you......."

"Sayuri, what's wrong with Zhang Huaixu? He ran out without finishing the test. Peking University's admissions exam will also refer to the results of the same model, he ....... like this: "Hao Jianren almost lay on the table, and in a hurry, he forgot to call Teacher Sayuri.

Sayuri's smile gradually faded, and she was silent for a while: "You two are good friends of Zhang Huaixu, so, the teacher told you." Just now, Zhang Huaixu's father called and said that his mother had passed away. ”

"His dad? Isn't his dad dead? ”

"It was his biological father, and the one who died, it was his biological mother." Sayuri sighed helplessly, "Zhang Huaixu, this kid, is actually very soft-hearted, you two should go back to the classroom now, Zhang Huaixu, the teacher will go to him." You're all my students, one of you doesn't know where to go anymore, you two, you can't have anything to do anymore........."

"But ........"

Sayuri said and said, her eyes were full of tears again, in order not to worry her, Hao Jianren and I could only go back to prepare for the exam later.

In the exam room, I tried to calm down as much as possible and read the questions on the exam paper.

It is very important to me because students who perform well in Fengling will be given the opportunity to apply to some universities and their university tuition fees will be waived.

For this reason, I reviewed day and night for two whole months.

I'm a selfish person, I don't want my hard work to be ruined, and I don't want to ruin the opportunity to get into a good university..........

I'm a selfish person, I'm a selfish person.......

"Teacher." I raised my hand tremblingly, "I want to turn in the papers?"

"Are you sure? The volume behind you is all blank. The invigilator read my paper over and over again and asked me suspiciously.

"Yes, I'm going to turn in the papers."

Without waiting for her to agree, I ran out.

The school gates were wide open, and I went to the carport to take a look. His bike is still there, and if he hadn't taken the bus, he probably wouldn't have gone far.

I tried to recall everything he had said to me before, including what he liked and where he wanted to go........

For the first time, I felt that Beicheng was so big, so big that it could completely bury a person without leaving a trace.

I didn't dare to talk to people on the side of the road to ask, so I could only keep looking for it, running through every familiar place in Beicheng, the woods full of flowers, the streets full of people, and the old alleys.

How could such a big living person not be found? Where will it go........

The night is getting darker, and there are no stars in the night sky tonight, only a few lonely stars, trying to glow, scattered and scattered, as if abandoned in the corners of the world, stubbornly shining through.

I really didn't have the strength to look for it, so I crouched at the base of the wall to rest, looking at the clock that I had drawn with a pen when I was bored.

When I was a child, the watch painted in my hand, it would not go, but it took away our best time, it had no time, nor could it guide the direction, like a lonely needle in the sea, confused and overwhelmed, at the fork in the road of life, hesitating..........

We all just want to live the most ordinary life, but sometimes, fate is unfair.