Chapter 193: Never Give Up

"Just to such an extent, I vomited, and my hands trembled?" Jiang Haozhe's tone did not soften, "There are more terrifying than this." If you can't stand it, leave early! ”

"Director Jiang, I'm sorry!" Song Shanmei looked apologetic and cramped, "I am willing to do anything to make up for this mistake!" ”

"What can you do?!" Jiang Haozhe asked contemptuously, "Isn't it, if the operation is wrong and the patient dies in the future, you can also say so easily, you can make up for it?!" Do you think that everything can be remedied?! ”

Song Shanmei felt chills all over her body. She was scared that she would lose her job because of it.

"I ......" Song Shanmei hesitated for a moment and said, "From today onwards, I am willing to go to the intensive care unit for a shift." ”

The intensive care unit is the busiest and hardest place in the hospital, almost 24 hours a day, and once you go, you can be busy in the dark.

Moreover, there, it doesn't matter if you are a girl or not, whether you want to take care of it or not, whether you are male or female, the work intensity is the same. Legend has it that in the intensive care unit, women are used as men, and men are used as animals! Moreover, when it comes out, the whole person will lose at least 20 pounds. If you don't meet the standard, it means that your work intensity is still not enough, which means that you are lazy.

Therefore, in the eyes of all interns, the intensive care unit is a terrifying existence, and no one wants to go.

This time, in order to make up for her mistakes, Song Shanmei took the initiative to go to the intensive care unit with extremely high work intensity and urgent shortage of manpower, Jiang Haozhe was stunned for a moment, and he didn't know what to think, he glanced at her up and down, and said, "With your body, can you do it?" ”

"Don't let me go in vertically, come out horizontally!" Jiang Haozhe said coldly, and then, quietly looked around, saw that no one around was paying attention to this side, and said: "In the future, if this is the case, don't talk nonsense!" I don't think I heard it! ”

"If you really admit your mistake, go to the morgue to help, and see the dead more often, which can also reduce your fear of death." Jiang Haozhe said, "Go and work for a few days, take a good look at the deceased, and have a good experience of the mood of those deceased who survived before their deaths." There is also the urgency of the family. ”

"In this way, you will understand that your work is not terrible, but very important, very sacred, and you are a warrior in a race against death." Jiang Haozhe said, and asked, "Is it okay?" ”

"I can do it!" Song Shanmei nodded and clenched her fists.

"Okay, I'll say hello over there in a while, you go and help for a few days, and then come back when you understand death." Jiang Haozhe said.

After finishing speaking, Jiang Haozhe packed up his things and left the operating room.

Song Shanmei was left alone, standing in place. She breathed a sigh of relief, bit her lip secretly, determined, to work harder, to overcome all fears.

Jiang Haozhe walked out of the operating room, and at the door, Dr. Zhou had just been told the precautions after the operation with his family members and chased after him.

After hesitating for a moment, Doctor Zhou said tentatively: "Doctor Jiang, I think what you said today is a bit heavy. ”

"Song Shanmei really didn't do well, but who didn't have the first time? Who hasn't been afraid to cry when they're in the air? "Dr. Zhou is excusing Song Shanmei.

It's a pity that Jiang Haozhe didn't listen to it at all.

"As a medical worker, you should have the awareness of a medical professional!" Jiang Haozhe said coldly.

"Oh." Dr. Zhou shut up.

Jiang Haozhe said again, "She applied by herself to go to the morgue to help, and I also allowed it." ”

"Huh?" Dr. Zhou's eyes widened, "Are you willing to do this?" ”

"Haozhe, I really can't understand you anymore. obviously seems to like her very much, but it seems that he treats her more harshly than anyone else. Dr. Chow said.

"I have always been a person and a person who does things, and I have always made a clear distinction between public and private." Jiang Haozhe smiled and said.

"That's just as well." Dr. Chow was a little struck by it.

"Also, don't you think that Song Shanmei has not only changed her name, but it also doesn't seem to be the same as before?" Doctor Zhou thought about it and asked tentatively.

"I remember that she used to be ...... fainting blood," Dr. Chow added, "I remember one time when we were fighting and someone had a nosebleed, she fainted. ”

Jiang Haozhe laughed, "How many years ago, you still remember it clearly." ”

Dr. Zhou grinned, "I always have a good memory. ”

Jiang Haozhe put away his smile and fell into deep thought.

Dr. Chow was right. He felt the same way.

This Song Shanmei, unlike before, is really different. Except for the similarity of the faces, it seems that they are two people at all.

"Also, she seems to be not so clingy to me, obviously I used to like it very much, but now, she pretends not to know and doesn't care." When Jiang Haozhe said this, he was a little sad.

"Well, people will change, it doesn't make sense, people planted on you a few years ago, they have to plant on you for a lifetime." Dr. Chow said, "Maybe, that's her real state, and I think it's good." ”

"yes, after all, it's been five years apart. She probably hated me so much. Jiang Haozhe sighed.

"How come, I love you, maybe I don't have it, but I hate you, it's not enough, right?" Dr. Zhou looked puzzled.

"You may not know that back then, it was I who pasted the love letter she gave me on the bulletin board of her school." When Jiang Haozhe spoke, he was a little embarrassed, "Also, after that incident, I, I woke up, because I was ashamed and angry, I actually threw the money in my wallet on her......"

"Ah?!!h Dr. Zhou's eyes widened in disbelief. Jiang Haozhe lost his body and told him, but he never said anything about it.

Come to think of it, although it is a little inappropriate for a girl to do that to that extent, but she really loves him to the core, so she did that kind of thing. However, he took revenge and humiliated her in a cruel way.

"She is now disheartened with me and hates me to the core, and she deserves it." Jiang Haozhe said.

"The past is over, she doesn't say it now, what are you struggling with?" Dr. Zhou said, "I want to open it a little." ”

"Could it be that you really like her?" Dr. Zhou asked, "Don't you feel like you can't get over your face?" ”

"Think about it, it's true, I rejected her in a humiliating way at the beginning, and now, people are boring to you, and you want to post it again, I really don't know what to say......" Dr. Zhou also felt difficult.

"No, how could I fall in love with that crazy woman?!" Jiang Haozhe only felt sullen in his heart.

"I see, you're obviously a dead duck with a hard mouth." Dr. Zhou pursed his lips and said, "Perhaps, you liked her back then, but you just didn't want to admit it." ”

"Who said that?!" Jiang Haozhe asked with a glare.

"Since you don't like it, why are you depressed after rejecting her and cutting off all contact with her?" Dr. Zhou asked, "I remember, you also saw a psychiatrist." ”

"You're not going to tell me that you really, simply feel insulted?" Dr. Chow was puzzled.

Jiang Haozhe's face turned red, but he said, "I want you to take care of it!" He was so angry that he didn't want to speak, obviously he was a victim back then, okay? Why didn't everyone understand his mood at that time?!

"Come on, don't think I don't know, you went to her when you were about to graduate with a master's degree. You also asked her former roommate about her. It's just that she was too excluded at that time, so she left the school and lived outside the school, only when she finally got her graduation certificate, she came back once. When she left, no one knew where she had gone. Dr. Zhou said.

"Speaking of which, I still admire her, when she was in middle school, in order to be admitted to the same school as me, she went from the 120th in the whole grade to the top 30."

"Then, she took the art exam and got a lower score, so she really went to the same school as me." Jiang Haozhe recalled.

"But, damn it, I loved me so much back then, I didn't even want reputation or dignity. Nowadays, if you say you turn your face, you turn your face, and if you don't know it, you don't know it. A woman's heart is really ruthless. Jiang Haozhe said in a low voice.

Doctor Zhou smiled and patted Dr. Zhou on the shoulder, "Haozhe, why didn't I find out, you are a scumbag?" Back then, but you rejected other people's ones, what happened to the girl, whether she was pregnant, you didn't even ask. ”

"Now, there is still a face to say that people are ruthless?! I think that the girl is a painful learner and forgets you, that's right! People hate you, and they deserve it. Doctor Zhou said, "Besides, do you think that kind of thing didn't hit that girl much back then?" Perhaps, this girl has traumatic amnesia. ”

Jiang Haozhe suddenly trembled. At this moment, he clearly knew that he was not an innocent victim back then. And, too, a perpetrator.

Dr. Zhou is right, he is indeed a scumbag!

Since she doesn't like people, why, she was so good to her back then, which made her have a delusion? Why not keep the distance you deserve? I naively thought that there could be pure friendship between men and women!

Bah! What an innocent friendship!

If a man and a woman are very good, but they are not boyfriend and girlfriend relationships, they must be one of them, who is forbearing, burying love in the bottom of their hearts, paying silently, and not asking for anything in return!

When Jiang Haozhe was thinking about himself, Dr. Zhou was mending the knife again: "I think it, you are not only a scumbag before, but now, you are also a scumbag." ”

"What?" Jiang Haozhe looked up and asked.

"Since I like people, I finally met again, why don't you confess? Still aggressive? Didn't you treat her like this to force her away?! Dr. Zhou said.

Jiang Haozhe bit his lip and did not speak.

"I said, maybe, girl, I still like you at this time, but I was hit too deeply and scared, so I didn't dare to confess again. So, I think, this time, you should take the initiative. Dr. Zhou said, "Also, don't be faceless, happiness is the most important thing compared to face, isn't it?" ”

"Happiness is the most important thing compared to face? ......" Jiang Haozhe read silently.

He thought that the words had come out, and that he had to set an example for others. Therefore, Song Shanmei still has to go to the morgue to help, as for the time, he can adjust it and let her come back earlier.

Early the next morning, Song Shanmei cleaned up and went to the morgue to help.

The morgue is located in the basement of the hospital and can be taken down by elevator or by stairs. In the whole basement, not many people came, and it was very dim, damp, and cold, which made people feel invisibly frightened.

It was an elderly administrator who came to receive her, and he led Song Shanmei to the rows and rows of freezers, explained the matters to be paid attention to, and left, returned to his office, and read the newspaper.

Her job was tiring, and, a bit monotonous, scary, and unsufficiencious.

Her daily job is to receive the dead sent by various departments in the hospital, and then, register the number of the corpse, store it in the freezer, and wait for the family to come and collect it.

Some family members, when they see the deceased, will cry out of breath and go into shock. Song Shanmei had to do some emergency rescue work again.

She was there for a whole week. From the first day, she trembled with fear, to the second day, she had slowly adapted.

To be honest, when you are a student, dead people are not uncommon, but unfortunately, those dead people, that is, teachers in general, are completely different from the dead people here.

In general, the teacher has his head wrapped around his face, and he cannot see his face, and, in general, does not open the plastic bag on his face.

Their bodies are also very hard, because they have been soaked in the solution for a long time, and they are not fresh, and they have become almost very stiff, and a thick, reddened layer of oil will be produced on the epidermis, which is very difficult to scratch with a knife.

Moreover, there is a smell of disinfectant and formalin solution on all bodies.

However, the dead here are fresh, and some of them have just died, and their bodies are still warm. Moreover, they are all wearing clothes, and their appearance has been simply tidied up, and they, as human beings, leave this world with the dignity of the dead, with the grief and retention of all people, and with attachment to this world.

They have more human feelings than the general teacher, and they also have more joys and sorrows, love and hate. Although they are dead, they have not severed their ties with this world.

In this world, there are still relatives who are deeply attached to them and are reluctant.

Therefore, their deaths are more susceptible to empathy, sympathy, and grief.

Song Shanmei stays here, and when she is not busy, she sits here and rests quietly. She felt as if she wasn't alone, and she could hear the voices of the dead.

She seemed to be able to see what they looked like when they were alive. You can also see what they looked like when they died.

However, once a person is gone, there is nothing left.

Everything that I was attached to in my life, money, fame, profit, status, power, and feelings, all turned into a handful of ashes, and when the wind blew, it was gone.

They are dead, there is nothing left, but the living people still have to live. But he is still struggling in pain. The things they can't forget, the people they can't forget, will stay with them for a long time, even until they die.

Here, Song Shanmei is no longer afraid, and all she has left is awe of her short and fragile life, as well as compassion.

It is precisely because of this compassion for life that she has regained her attachment and strengthened her faith.

Jiang Haozhe is right, their medical staff are brave people who race against death! Save the life and help the wounded, race against time, do your best, and never give up!

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