Back to the nursing home has been the next afternoon, simply put, we went to the underworld for a full day and a half, become a ghost do not know hunger, but come back immediately feel hungry and cold, fortunately at noon nursing home noon gruel buns made a lot, Wu Dalang quickly brought us a big pot out, everyone buried their heads in the sea to eat and drink. Pen ~ fun ~ pavilion www.biquge.info

By the way, I asked Xiao Gu, saying that Ren Xiaoyan waited for a day like ants on the hot pot yesterday, and today is another morning, about two hours ago, I was forced to reluctantly agree to meet tonight, the second generation and his parents on the Forbes list are here, and she can only try to arrange plan B when she can't wait for us - pretending to be a lesbian, or a lesbian attack of a female man who picks her feet, and now it is estimated that she is buying Brother Chun's clothes on the street for use.

I called her, and without waiting for her to complain, she reported the good news, saying that the thing had been OK down Missy, and immediately listened to her surprise cheers on the other end of the phone, and then, she quickly returned the clothes that had been paid, and I kindly prompted: "I think you should change to XXXL and come back, or I'm afraid you won't dare to go out when the time comes." ”

Ren Xiaoyan was stunned for a moment, but quickly came to her senses: "Yes! I really had to get my clothes ready. ”

I then added, "It's better to buy more..."

"Why?" She was instantly alert: "Will I be fat for a long time?" ”

I shouted that I had made a mistake, I wanted to take the opportunity of her to buy clothes for Wu Da to get two bodies, but I didn't want to go astray but he thought, I could only say honestly: "That's whatever you want, but it's really only a day or two." ”

Ren Xiaoyan thought about it, and suddenly smiled: "I think you have a point, you have to have at least three or four clothes in a day or two." ”

Me: "...... You're right! "It's worthy of a woman, no matter when and where you don't forget to dress up, even if you weigh more than two hundred, remember what a saying goes? Women, no matter how many clothes there are, they feel that there is one less set, and no matter how little they are, they feel that there are two points, this is the reason!

After informing Ren Xiaoyan, we continued to struggle with the gruel buns and small pickles, and the others were fine, only Xiao Zuanfeng looked left and right to look forward to the vegetables on his face, and muttered: "Could it be that humans have evolved to the top of the food chain for tens of millions of years just to eat grass?" Hungry for a day without even a meat? ”

Lori took a sip of porridge, glanced at it and said, "It's only been a few days, you are getting plump now, if you become Mr. Kong's appearance, I will see how you will be by then." ”

Kong Lao Er rolled his eyes and deliberately ignored it, but I was overjoyed: "It would be good if it really looked like that - at least you don't have to stay in the kitchen every day, you have to wear a mask and sunglasses as soon as you go out, two hundred catties, even if the little fresh meat has become big fat!" ”

At this time, the second-hand man walked in with a plastic bag humming a small song, and when he saw us, he generously threw the plastic bag over and greeted: "It's just right, hurry up and taste the sauce elbow I bought, and I queued up for more than an hour." ”

Xiao Zhuanfeng smiled happily and took out the elbow, Kong Lao Er smiled, only Ximen Fuxue continued to push the porridge bowl away quietly, and went upstairs alone to continue to ponder, I looked at the bag that was indeed Li Kum Kee's sauce elbow, and suddenly doubted in my heart: "Tai Er, where did you get the money?" ”

Tai Er said: "The mountain people have their own clever plans, I not only made money, but also began to accumulate virtue and do good deeds by the way." ”

We wondered, "How so?" ”

Tai Er smiled and didn't answer, but Xiao Gu who added kimchi to us said in one sentence: "Tai Er is outside to show people fortune telling and fortune measurement, and it is said to be quite accurate, the old man and the old lady in the entire vegetable market know everything......"

I glared and said anxiously, "You're trying to destroy us!" Tai Er, do you know what it means to cheat them out of money? For a dollar, people can form a reinforcement group to kill our store and crush your bones to ashes! ”

Tai Er thought blankly for a while, and said happily: "Fortunately, I didn't lie." ”

I was extremely confused and said, "Didn't you say you have no mana?" ”

Tai Er was also a little confused by me, frowning and thinking bitterly: "Does this have anything to do with whether there is mana?" ”

"Look, isn't that it!" I looked around at the table, stood up with my hands spread out, and asserted: "Before the situation deteriorates further, let's quickly remedy this matter - Taier, think about how many people you have shown you, and we will ask Xiaoqing to help come to the door one by one to apologize, so as not to get out of control when the time comes......"

"Oops, people are here!"

Suddenly, there was a shout at the door, and when I turned my head, it was an old lady with a large group of Yangge team and square dance team members, everyone's face was red, I hurriedly rushed to them, apologized: "I'm sorry, uncle and aunt, this matter is ......."

Before the words fell, the flow of people rushed over instantly, and I stumbled under my feet and was squeezed away, and when I reacted, Tai Er was already surrounded by a group, and the voices were full of voices:

"Master, help me see the photo......"

"Help, master, something strange happened in my family recently, you can help me solve it......"

"Master, I want to calculate when I will be able to get married......"

It seems that Taiji's words are true: he really didn't use any mana to fool the old man and the old lady, just like those broken shops on the street that do free health check-ups and sell medical products, they can always easily gain trust and steal their frugal pensions, and the fooling skills for the elderly are completely grandmaster-level...... I sat back down at the table, scratching my scalp and asking, "What should I do?" ”

Other people have a better mentality than me.,No one stopped eating and drinking.,The sauce elbow has been cleaned up except for the bone stick in the middle.,It's Lolita who took the time to persuade me: "Forget it.,If you come, you'll be safe.,Just see what's going on!" ”

"That's all there is to it!" I sighed, picked up the chopsticks again and pestle them on the table twice, and was just about to start, Xiao Dian grabbed the bone in his hand at a gallop, and looked at me with harmless eyes.

The old lady first pulled a girl out, who was shouting for help just now, "Master, my house has been making trouble lately, I don't know if there is anything unclean," the girl was terrified and said, "Please!" ”

Tai Er looked at him calmly and said, "Say, what's a strange thing?" ”

The girl hurriedly said: "Recently, I sat on the chair, and the chair suddenly fell apart, and then I sat on the sofa, and the sofa also collapsed, and the most powerful thing was last night, the bed collapsed inexplicably in the middle of the night - master, do you say there is something dirty in my house?" ”

Tai Er pinched a finger with both hands that I couldn't understand and circled around the girl, the audience was solemn, only me and Lori Xi Xiao Diamond Wind and a group of people exchanged heads, "This matter seems to be in your hands, right?" I said to Lori.

Lolixi was also puzzled: "I thought it should be like this......"

Xiao Zhuanfeng speculated: "Could it be that when did Tai Er learn it?" ”

We discussed for a long time, and finally unanimously decided: "This matter is definitely over, or Lolita or I have to appear to turn the tide, and then we have to clean up this guy!" ”

Tell me, what else can you do besides deceiving you about this kind of thing?

This is just our speculation, Tai Er didn't seem to think so, and after turning around three times, his eyes were slightly closed and his hands were spread, and he said thoughtfully: "There is already a way to do this." ”

The girl hurriedly took out two red tickets and put them in his hand.

Then, we listened to Tai Er's real person say quietly: "Girl, I advise you to lose weight, don't talk about the bed if you go on like this, even the floor may not be able to hold it!" ”

We were abruptly "......! ”

The second is an otaku with black bags and blank eyes, and his face is full of black lines when he comes out: "Master, recently I have been pressed on the bed by a ghost every night, and when I opened my eyes, I saw a black shadow at the head of the bed, and I was almost scared out of my heart attack!" ”

"It's really good this time!" I looked around at everyone with a sad face: "If you're not a professional, you shouldn't be fine, right?" ”

Xiao Zuanfeng nodded in agreement: "Why don't you introduce him to a writer who writes horror novels?" Some of them are said to be quite capable! ”

Lolita smiled: "Wait, maybe Taier has a way?" She seemed to have been inspired by the incident just now, and her confidence in Taiji was also erected, and I immediately objected: "Don't! What should I do if something happens? ”

It's the same again, we haven't thought about it yet, but Tai Er came up with an idea in advance, he walked over and said to Xiao Zuanfeng: "Go and help me buy a pair of flat glasses back, and then %...#%\&*()......##¥%%"

Ten minutes later, the glasses were bought, and Taiji posted two nude NV photos on them and handed them to the boy, "Wear glasses when you sleep in the future, so you won't be afraid!" ”

I immediately frantically said, "Is this okay?" ”

Tai Er smiled: "Why can't it?" Otaku, do you think you can see two naked NVs when you open your eyes, and he can control who is sitting at the head of the bed? I just hope that the female ghost who pressed the bed will have better luck, and don't be XXOO when his beast blood is boiling......"

We: "......"

Before the otaku went out, there was a ghost crying wolf howling outside, and several old men teamed up to drag a desperately struggling young man in, and as soon as he came, he panted for help: "Master help!" My son's girlfriend of three years ran away with a rich second generation, and he can't think about committing suicide, please help us persuade him! ”

The young man writhed on the ground like a loach, shouting hysterically: "I don't listen, I don't listen, I can't change my mind when I say anything......" The old brother could barely hold it down, and almost let him jump up from the ground and slip away, I saw that the situation was not good, and immediately asked Wu Dalang to go up to help - as soon as he pressed it, the young man was suddenly honest, rolling his eyes and his fingers couldn't move.

Tai Er was embarrassed: "Being trapped by love is the most difficult, and it may not be easy for you to ask me to save him!" ”

The old man immediately handed over a stack of red tickets, he didn't even look at the pocket, and then his face changed: "That's it, saving someone's life is better than creating a seventh-level floating slaughter, I'll help you - come, help me get this kid to the kitchen, I'll talk to him alone." ”

Everyone did it together, and got people in, and as the door slammed shut, everyone outside began to be scared, but they never expected that less than five minutes later, the young man and Tai Er walked out shoulder to shoulder, the gloom on their faces was swept away, thanked him, and his father went back happily, seeing everyone's eyes straight......

Someone asked Tai Er what he said, but he just laughed and didn't answer, so that we all couldn't understand the situation: "Does this guy really have the ability to help the world and save people?" ”

We still want to watch it again, but at this time Ren Xiaoyan came back, in order to avoid the sequelae of eating Wang Ba cake to cause panic to the old man and the old lady, I could only let Tai Er take someone out to continue, and a group of people immediately recommended the community elderly activity center, and hugged him and pulled him to go.

Ren Xiaoyan was stunned and replied: "What's the matter?" Taiji is suddenly so popular? ”

I casually said, "He went to the square dance yesterday to lead the dance." ”

Ren Xiaoyan suddenly said: "I see, it's no wonder," this matter was just a matter of saying, she was still concerned about getting fat, and then asked: "Are things ready?" ”

I nodded, took something out of my pocket and handed it over: "Eat it, and you'll be fat soon." ”

Ren Xiaoyan hesitated with this ball of things that seemed to be dough but was actually dough, a bit of a feeling that the dog had nowhere to bite Wang Ba, so I could only persuade on the side: "It's really not good, you still pretend to be a lesbian, after all, it's not anyone who can stand to suddenly gain more than 100 pounds!" ”

Ren Xiaoyan bit her lip and suddenly looked up at me: "Can you really get fat by yourself?" ”

I looked at Kong Laoer, he nodded, and I could only say with a heart: "Yes!" ”

Ren Xiaoyan didn't say a word, took the dough and walked upstairs, her high heels stepped on the stairs and gagged a da, seeing that she had just disappeared at the corner of the stairs, I suddenly shouted: "Ren Xiaoyan wait!" ”

Everyone was shocked, and Ren Xiaoyan even rushed back at a speed that burned her buttocks, and said in horror: "What's wrong?" Can't you lose weight? ”

Everyone turned their attention to Kong Lao Er, and he was so anxious that he shouted: "Who said you can't lose weight?" I didn't say anything! ”

Ren Xiaoyan looked at me again, and I said, "You didn't take your clothes, and when the time comes, ...... Ahem, what will you change when the time comes? ”

Ren Xiaoyan went upstairs again with her clothes, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief, and Kong Lao Er complained to me on the side: "What are you doing, I almost made me unconfident!" ”

I smiled and didn't say anything, only Xiao Zhuanfeng accosted me: "That's it, your ability to fool is far worse than Tai Er." ”

"What's wrong?" Kong Lao Er was a little unconvinced: "At that time, I was a person who accepted disciples all over the world, and my ability to hold money was no worse than him-if it weren't for the fact that now I am interested in studying traditional dances and the mysteries of the rise of the nations, wouldn't it be his turn?" ”

"Don't lie to you, the rise of China really has nothing to do with square dancing, so don't be busy."

We weren't interested in Kong Laoer's square dance, but the previous things were different, the fire of gossip suddenly burned, and a group of people except for Wu Xiaogu, who was busy in the kitchen, and Ximen, who was meditating upstairs, all the others came over with great interest, "Tell me about your great achievements?" ”

Kong Lao Er said proudly: "There is a saying I don't know if you have heard, it is called: Thirty and stand, forty and not confused, fifty and know the destiny of heaven, sixty and obedient, seventy and do what you want, do not exceed the rules?" ”

I vaguely remember hearing these words when I was in school, talking about the rules that Kong Lao Er taught to be a man back then, but I didn't know exactly how to say it, so I said vaguely: "I know, what's wrong?" ”

"What's wrong?" Kong Lao Er laughed: "Actually, this is the charging rule of my cram school, specifically like this: standing at thirty, you can only stand and listen to lectures for thirty yuan a month; Forty is not confused, forty dollars can ask questions until you have no doubts; Fifty knows the destiny of heaven, that is, you can know the proposition of the daily test by paying fifty taels; Sixty ears are smooth, that is, you can afford the price of sixty taels, and I can also say something good to your family, so that your parents can listen to it; Seventy does what you want, which means that you can read novels in class, sleep or not, you don't have to follow the rules, you are passing anyway......"

We were dumbfounded, and it took us a long time to say in unison: "Black! It's so dark! ”

(Guess, what did Taier Zhenren say to Xiao Young, which could make him turn his sorrow into joy in an instant?) ）