"I see, I'm not a good partner, a good husband, but I should be a good dad, right?"

"You don't count."

"I'm not even qualified?"

"Do you think it's easy to qualify?" Nan Sheng said: "I asked myself what I had done for these two children, and I didn't dare to say that I was a qualified mother, at most I was a mother who was not too bad." What about you, what have you done for Sister Ning and Zhao Yang in the years they have grown up? ”

"I didn't let them lack food and clothing."

"You don't think you're a good dad if you didn't let them starve and freeze, do you?" Nansheng Road.

"Not everyone in those days was like that."

"Yes, when you were growing up, you felt that eating enough was all about it. But even then, you are not qualified. Nan Sheng sighed: "Do you know that when Zhao Yang was in elementary school, he was often hungry and often ate cold rice. Did you know he had a stomach problem, he had it when he was in middle school? ”

"Does he have a stomach problem?" Zhao Guangwu looked embarrassed: "I don't know, I've been working outside." ”

"To put it right, you've been working out of town to help your first love."

"I have something to earn."

"I know that when Zhao Yang was admitted to university, your monthly salary was 700 yuan, excluding your own basic expenses, it is equivalent to having nothing left." Nan Sheng crossed his fingers to settle accounts for Zhao Guangwu: "Do you know how much our monthly living expenses were when we went to college?" We are an art college, with an annual tuition fee of 8,000, a accommodation fee of 1,000, and a monthly living fee of about 300, which is still the lowest consumption standard. ”

"It's all in charge."

"Yes, these things are in charge of my mother, so have you ever thought about where she will earn all this money as a woman? You haven't thought about it because you don't feel like you need to worry about these things, or you know it, but you don't want to worry about it, you don't want to take the burden of finding money on yourself. ”

Zhao Guangwu looked a little cramped, and kept picking his hands.

"Zhao Yang told me about your family, saying that Sister Ning studied very well when she was in school, and said that she wanted to take the health school after graduating from junior high school, but her mother disagreed. When he said that he wanted to go to college, his mother was also strongly opposed. When I didn't think about it, I also thought that she was too much, and I felt that she was a mother who ruined her daughter's life and her son's future. ”

"Your mom really doesn't think long-term."

"It's not that she doesn't think about it for the long term, it's that she can't think about it for the long term." Nan Sheng defended Zhu Huiqin: "She knows that the family has no money, and she knows that her husband and the child's father can't bring back the money." She's a woman, and she can't afford that. She was afraid, afraid that she would not have the money to pay for her daughter's tuition, afraid that she would not be able to support her son. ”

"People must have a pattern, but the premise of having a pattern is that there is no shortage of money." Nan Sheng looked at his hands: "These things were only thought out after I got divorced. I envy other people's children for being versatile, I want my sons to be top-notch, and I want them to be the ones to shine in the crowd. But the most important factor in all of this is money. ”

"If you don't have money, you can still become a talent."

"If you don't have money, you can become a talent, what are the odds of that? Not necessarily one out of 100,000 people. We all say that it's not good to talk about money, talk about money snobbery, but dreams without money are at most pipe dreams. Nan Sheng continued to count with his fingers: "Don't talk about it, it's just the children's learning right now." If you don't sign up for tutoring classes, you're falling behind other kids. Can tutoring classes, dozens of classes, how many parents can support it, and how many single mothers can support it? ”

"I don't blame you, you did your best." Zhao Guangwu comforted Nan Sheng.

"Yes, I did my best, I did my best to provide them with the best material conditions. But the family is for two people, the children are for two people, and one person's efforts can only hold up half the sky. ”

"Half the sky is half the sky, as long as it doesn't collapse."

"It's not that it can't collapse, but it's going to collapse little by little." Nan Sheng said: "You know that you did your best, and you think the children should understand you." But when they grow up, when they have to face the cruel struggle for survival in this society, they will resent you, resentful that you failed to give them more skills, failed to provide them with a higher starting point, a better platform. ”

"Then parents have this little ability, they can't kill us."

"Of course they can't, but they hold grudges, they complain, they give up on themselves." Nan Sheng looked at Zhao Guangwu's eyes: "Isn't your son Zhao Yang the best example?" ”

"Is his chances bad? He earns more than 10,000 yuan a month, which is not a lot. ”

"He earned the opportunity to go to school, except for the tuition fee for the first year of college, he borrowed the rest of the tuition fee himself, and his job was also interviewed by himself one by one." Nan Sheng said: "As a parent, what did you provide him?" ”

"He's grown up, what else do we have to offer him?"

"Peace of mind! This is what is often referred to as a sense of security. ”

"What is security?"

"I can't say it either, but I think the so-called sense of security is a way out." Nan Sheng said while thinking: "Zhao Yang always said that he envied me very much, felt that my ability to resist pressure was stronger than him, and he was more optimistic than him in many things. But my family is also average, and my parents' economic conditions were even inferior to yours for a time. Why is it that I can rise to the challenge, but he will only choose to escape? ”

"Why?"

"Because I know that I have my parents behind me, and even if I don't have a good time, they will open the door and welcome me back. When I encounter something, they will stand up and support me as soon as possible, such as getting married, such as taking care of children, such as buying a house, and divorcing Zhao Yang for example. Whatever decision I make, they will support me and be the one I can go backwards. ”

"Didn't we help him? When you bought the house, we also gave the money. ”

"Yes, as parents, you have also given him support, but before you give him support, you must always hit him first and count him down. When you have suppressed him and seen that he has no way out, you will appear as a rescuer. ”

"We're not—"

"You are." Nan Sheng was very sure: "When Zhao Yang was admitted to university, you didn't show that you were very happy, and you didn't affirm him at the first time. Instead, he was persuaded to give up his studies, saying that his grades would not be useful even if he went to college, that he was a waste of money to go to school, and that he might as well go out to work. ”

"He didn't study well, and the school he was admitted to was really average."

"No matter how bad he is, he was admitted to the undergraduate program. No matter how bad that school is, it will make him earn a monthly salary of more than 10,000 yuan after graduation. All this proves that he made the right choice in the first place, and that your knowledge is short. Nan Sheng said: "Of course, this is also related to your economic situation at the time, you have no money, you are afraid of spending money, and you are afraid that you will not be able to earn money." You didn't think about fighting for his future, for his future. ”

Nan Sheng said emphatically: "I have accompanied him all the way, and I know how worried he has been over the years. When he was in school, he was worried about living expenses every day, and he was worried about tuition fees every semester. He was afraid that he would not have money to eat, and that he would be kicked back by the school if he could not pay the tuition. That kind of anxiety and uneasiness should not have appeared on him in the first place. Because you don't bear it, he has to bear it. ”

This marriage