Surrounded by dim, dizzying white lights swaying like a body under a gallows. The uniformed guards led us up one by one, and soon they would be transformed into firing squads. Gu Feifei had a huge black military hat on his head, and the golden eagle emblem shone with a dazzling light. She wears a red armband on her arm, a row of crossed spears, and the more familiar ** swastika symbols reveal the chill from the abyss.

Let's go! Li Baichuan viciously pushed us in front of Gu Feifei with the butt of his gun. The handcuffs collided with each other with a subtle tinkling dong, forming an eerie ensemble with the dull sound of footsteps. She held an unlit cigarette in her hand, and the backlit shadow looked at us from top to bottom, and the flickering gaze under the military hat also swept us over, like a sharp knife.

"What's your name?" She pointed her cigarette at Ye Ruiyang, a voice that was so majestic that it was unquestionable.

"Sol." [1]

"Have you ever participated in an international column?"

Ye Ruiyang didn't say anything.

"Speak!" She poked the cigarette butt in Ye Ruiyang's face. The fire that didn't burn burned him. Ye Ruiyang replied, he did not deny it, and said that the documents had been searched.

"Kid, what's your name?" Gu Feifei walked up to Mi Le and pointed a finger at his chin.

"Rahmiel." [2]

She lowered her finger and was about to walk over to me when Millet turned to her sharply and shouted at her as if trying to grasp a life-saving straw that he had been wronged and that his brother was the one who resisted. My brother ran away, and he didn't belong to any party, he never understood politics, and he couldn't be punished for his brother's business. Millet almost cried, squatting down weakly as she spoke, like a frightened little animal, and was about to kneel on the ground and beg her. Gu Feifei didn't reply, her order came from the scarlet spear armband on her arm, and the little ghost was escorted down. As soon as the words fell, Li Baichuan and his accomplices emerged from the shadows like a ghost, and caught Mi Le and Ye Ruiyang into the darkness on the other side.

It's just me and Gu Feifei.

"Your name is Correa." [3]

"Yes."

My voice seemed even more devoid of warmth than hers.

"Where is Lennon, the son of your leader, hiding?" [4]

"I don't know."

"From the 7th to the 25th, he is hiding in your house."

"Nothing." Not really.

She waved her hand in annoyance, and the silent ghost of *** molecules carried a gun and dragged me into the shadows. Under the only light in the interrogation room, Gu Feifei's cigarette was still burning invisibly, she coughed dryly, spat out a non-existent phlegm in her throat, and then stepped on the dark earth with her leather boots.

"Is this an interrogation?" Ye Ruiyang asked the guards where I couldn't see clearly.

"This is the judgment." [5]

"You ...... What do you want to do with us? Millet's voice trembled not far away.

"The verdict was pronounced in the cell." [6]

A brief to long silence ensued. I don't know how much time passed, and we were pushed into the light. There was a cold bench there, and we sat down, and I was in the middle. The chains of the handcuffs finally stopped a little. Behind the chairs and lamps is a long brick wall.

"We're done." Ye Ruiyang didn't seem to be too frightened, while Miller was shaking and trying to get closer to me.

"That's right. Don't be afraid, they won't do anything to you. I patted Miller on the shoulder with my two handcuffed hands. Like a man in water, he found a piece of driftwood, snatched my arms and pulled at them spasmodically, trying to float myself. I had to pull away from him hard.

"Ramil has never done anything, just has an older brother who is a warrior, and that's it." Ye Ruiyang said.

Millet rested her head on my waist and continued to tremble. I caught a glimpse of him, staring straight ahead, not listening to us.

"It doesn't have to be shot. In Zaragoza, they told the prisoners to lie on the ground and run over them with trucks in order to save bullets. ”

"It's not a gas-saving one." I say. Mi Le trembled even more, Ye Ruiyang's words really annoyed me. "That's enough, don't talk about it."

"Not only does it save bullets, but it also makes the prisoner die slower and more painfully." The more he talked, the more he cocked his legs, as if he was talking about an inconsequential matter, or looking forward to the end of it, and this kind of death became the most important thing for a man to try in his mouth, "They threw the convicts who had been run over on the highway and exposed them to the sun, and their lungs were crushed, and they could not die, and they could not make a sound, so they called in a low voice, and they screamed for an afternoon before they died." ”

Millet moved his leg to the bench and curled up like a shaved hedgehog.

"That means *** is about to lose, and the bullets are running out." I think I'm comforting myself, and Millet makes me shiver, "They're not going to play this here." ”

No one spoke again. The pale light was on our faces, which must have lost their blood, like the tired wings of moths. Dust floats in front of our eyes, it's the only thing that moves at the moment, they're all dead.

"Why am I shivering, it's so cold in this place."

After speaking, Ye Ruiyang did radio gymnastics in handcuffs. Twisting his body, every part of his body shaking, he tried his best to warm himself up. First stretching, then running and jumping in place, and then clumps of tedious dust. His face flushed slightly, but he gasped as he stopped. A butt collapsed to the ground.

No one spoke. Ye Ruiyang gasped, Mi Le trembled, and I stared blankly into the darkness, with thousands of pairs of eyes staring at our every move.

Li Baichuan and the other two *** appeared from behind us without warning.

"What's their name?"

"Soler, Correa, Ramiel."

"Soler." He silently walked to Ye Ruiyang's side, squatted down, pressed his ear, dressed in black like the impermanence of the soul in the underworld, "You have been sentenced to death, here, and it will be executed early tomorrow morning." ”

Before Ye Ruiyang could speak, his ghost flickered in front of me and Mi Le.

"Both of you too."

"No way, there won't be me!" Mi Le shouted in a lost voice, almost fell off the bench, and hugged Li Baichuan's legs, "No me, no me!" ”

"What's your name?"

"Ramil Rice. （Rahmiel Rice）”

"Your name is on the list. Death penalty, shooting, immediate execution. ”

"I didn't do anything!" Miller's screams echoed in the air, and it was terrifying.

Li Baichuan's black military hat shook, and he shook Miller off his lap and walked towards me.

"Did you cry at your mother's funeral?"

Shake one’s head.

"That's right. You certainly don't need a priest and a confession, a doctor will come and tell him what you need. "He saluted us as if he were a serious soldier.

He's gone.

I saw Millet's face as white as an old wall, almost growing cracks of time, peeling off little by little. The familiar face was irreversibly twisted and deformed, and I was so frightened that I involuntarily grabbed his arm. It was supposed to be Ye Ruiyang who went, and then Mi Le would get rid of him.

Miller didn't shake my hand. I broke the plan in the jam show, so he didn't come according to the rehearsal either?

"Have you ever killed someone?" Ye Ruiyang asked on the side.

I didn't answer. Now it's time to get back to the script.

"You've killed, I know. I've also killed. ”

I looked back at him in amazement, trying to tell him with my eyes that you were mistaken, that it wasn't like that. But his eyes were empty, like a dark night sky stripped of stars. The same pale countenance was reflected in the light, and I believe that my face was exactly like theirs at this moment.

I'm a doctor. [7] A shadow floated before us. It's Li Lu, she will be wearing a military uniform to play that cruel *** lackey. But what appeared in front of us was a man in a white coat, and his face was completely unclear. He has a red cross on his hat, no, it's a black cross, weirdly crooked, anyone can recognize it, it's the German swastika.

"What are you doing here?" I do want to ask.

Help alleviate your pain.

"No, you're a ***." I noticed my voice trembling. I have to be brave, and I have to be the strongest person in the show in the script that the adults have prescribed. But I was scared, especially when I knew I had to keep my eyes on the doctor, as described in the script. I couldn't find his eyes, and there didn't seem to be any eyes on that dark face. It was a face made of steel and concrete.

Don't you notice that here, everyone is shivering with cold? [8] His words were still scripted, and his skin turned purple as in the novel, but then flashed a transparent green, as if he had a cold ghostly fire that was about to be extinguished.

"I'm not cold." [9] I replied. I'm sweating. Usually I sweat easily, and my physique is already hot, but today because of the cold, I am so cold that I sweat, and my thin and old prison clothes are wet, which makes me feel the cold that envelops me.

You need the lights. He said. I wanted to answer that there was a light here, although I didn't have that line. However, the white light went out as soon as he finished speaking. It was pitch black. My first instinct was to crouch down and hold my knees, like before, but I can't, I have to be the brave man, I have to be calm. Why didn't you notify us when the script was changed temporarily? I had to do what was written in the script. Is it to deliberately see our reactions? Miller, Boss Ye, why didn't you say a word? I can't feel you anymore.

The reproduced light came from the candle the Medic had pulled out of his sleeve, and it fluttered faintly, threatening to go out at any moment. The darkness had suddenly receded, and it seemed as if candles were burning in front of me, in front of me, on the left and right. Looking around, the walls around it were all mirrors, and the only light from the candle flame was refracted repeatedly, making the place brighter.

"Are you a doctor?" Miller asked. His gaze was glazed, and I suspected it was an expression that would only appear on my face. His trembling made the shadows in the mirror tremble in all directions, as if the mirror itself was shaking.

Be.

"Does it hurt? How long do people die? He suddenly subconsciously shook his head and corrected the question, "How long does it take for a person to die?" ”

It'll be over soon.

"But I've heard it's going to be ...... twice."

Sometimes, it doesn't always hit the nail on the head.

Millet's voice was exactly the same as usual, and the kind of question that came out of his mouth almost broke me. No, we rehearsed so many times, and we were still giggling at first. Why do you want to turn off the lights on this damn stage? Why don't you tell us that's going to be the end of the show? I was about to lose control of myself, so I wanted to hug Miller quickly, or push this inexplicable actor away, who is he? I can't ask, and I can't do what I want. I suddenly had a very bad aversion to acting, whether it was theater or film. I couldn't do anything, it was like a machine, doing meaningless things according to the programme.

I should have read a long monologue of mine. I didn't do that, I think I remember them, and it was a beautiful and long memory. But I couldn't pronounce it. I saw Ye Ruiyang glaring at me in disgust, was he blaming me for forgetting the words? But according to the script, he really wants to stare at me like this at this time, because I scared him in the script.

"Do you understand? You," he said, "I—I don't understand. ”[10]

"What, what's the matter?" [11]

"We're going to run into something I don't understand." [12]

"You'll understand right away." [13]

"It's not clear," he said stubbornly, "I'd love to have the courage, but at least let me know...... You say, you're going to take us out into the yard first, right, and then they're lining up in front of us. How many of them are there? ”[14]

I do not know. There will always be five or eight, no more. [15]

"Okay. Even if there were eight of them, the boss would shout to them, "Aim, and I would see eight guns pointed at me." I thought, by that time I must want to drill into the wall, and I will use all my strength to drill into that wall with my back, and the wall will be on top of me, and I will not be able to get in, like in a nightmare. I can imagine everything. Ah, you don't know how much I can imagine all of this. ”[16]

……

He took all the monologues away. It stands to reason that I would have interacted with him, and I would have interrupted him impatiently to say something almost teasing. He didn't give me a chance, and I couldn't say that. I'm so scared. I can't be afraid. In the script, I was only allowed to be strong.

"It's like being in a nightmare...... I saw my own body. It wasn't impossible, but it was myself and my own eyes that saw my body. It seems that I have to think again, that after that I can no longer see anything, I cannot hear anything, and the world continues to exist for the living. ”[17]

"Shut up!" [18] I should have a line behind me, but I can't say it, I just want to say these two words.

He grabbed my hand with such force that it almost dislocated my arm. Damn, I'm going to play the day after tomorrow, doesn't he want me to play?

I asked myself...... I asked myself, will people really be wiped out? ”[19]

I tried my best not to look at him. And then in the wall of mirrors, I couldn't escape the distorted face that caught my eye. Not only his, but mine, but not the doctor who was stroking Millet's head. I still couldn't see his face clearly. His hands were indeed as rosy and generous as his father's, and they touched Millet's chin. He opened his mouth to bite down, and according to the script, the doctor would back away in horror. He didn't, Miller's teeth were deeply embedded in it, and he bit so hard that I wanted to bite him hard. But the guy didn't react at all, as if the remaining tooth marks had nothing to do with him.

"That's a big lie." [20] My monologue is here again, and I have only spoken the first sentence.

Friends, I can take care of it, as long as the military authorities agree, to bring you a letter or a souvenir for your loved ones. The doctor said. [21]

"I don't have any close friends." [22] Ye Ruiyang said.

Millet was silent.

I felt like my clothes were getting wetter and colder. The teeth are constantly fighting. Hopefully, the audience didn't notice. It was too long a show and I wanted to end it quickly.

It's half past three. The doctor brutally told the time, a plot that I hated in the novel, but now it's like a countdown to relief.

Millet finally broke down, and he ran around the wall with his arms raised, shouting I don't want to die, I don't want to die. I saw countless of him running through the mirrors on the wall, then falling to the ground, crying loudly. Crying is contagious, but it shouldn't be contagious when performing. I had to sit quietly and watch it happen, almost spectively. I want to be hard-hearted, hard-hearted enough to say that line: I'm going to die a little backbone.

"You hear them move." [23]

"I hear you." [24]

There was a man walking out of each of the four mirrored walls that surrounded us, and I didn't know any of them. I only saw that the four of them had strips of cloth wrapped around their heads, with the words "Martial Luck for a long time", and in the middle was the rising sun that scattered bloody light, a sign that I had felt ominous since I was a child.

"Who is Ye Ruiyang?"

What do they say?

The doctor pointed them out.

"Where's Millet?"

What are they doing?

The one who fell to the ground was. As soon as the doctor's words fell, they set Millet up, saying that he was not the first person who couldn't stand it.

"Let's go." The person who took the lead said to Ye Ruiyang.

I got up and followed them. Not just according to the script, my actions were almost subconscious. It was as if it was safer to be dragged to the execution ground and shot than to stay here alone.

He stopped me.

"You're Kepeway?"

"Yes."

"You wait here, someone will come looking for you later." [25]

I'd rather they kill me right away. [26]

The candles went out, and they dragged them into the dark mirror. I heard gunshots ringing out in the mirror world. It's not a background sound effect playing in the background, it's real. I heard the first sound at the same time as if I heard someone calling my name, as if I was crying for help, like saying goodbye. So I rushed desperately to the mirror where they had disappeared, but it was a wall, a barrier that could not be broken. I hit it hard and fell to the ground, a damp feeling on my head, the smell of blood, I don't know whose it was.

"Now, it is to exchange your life with his. Just tell us where he's hiding, and we'll keep you alive. [27] After I fell, the black earth, which was as strong as a wall, said to me, "Where is Paul?" ”

"I don't know, what Paul, who is Paul?"

"Stand up and see."

I tried to get up, and I saw a blurry shadow on the wall of four mirrors, a light that came from nowhere, and I suspected that it came from the mirror. We haven't studied physics yet, but I know that mirrors don't shine on their own. But my four shadows appeared by the light in the mirror. Those were four completely different shadows. One is my usual appearance, one is my miserable face now, the other seems to be me a few years ago, shorter and thinner than now, but very energetic, and the last one is the dark shadow I have seen in my dreams, and I can't see the face clearly.

"See clearly, Paul, your accomplices, your brother."

"Why do you ask me when you know everything? No one would betray their brother. ”

It's not a line at all. For some reason, I feel a lot more relieved to say this.

They might beat me, and I don't know if I'll be able to handle it.

The voice went out. I finally got my wish and crouched down, hugged my knees, closed my eyes and stubbornly tried to sleep. I seemed to be asleep, and no one bothered me, even forgetting the tragedy that had just happened in the mirror, so peaceful.

"Have you thought about it?" The earth beneath me woke me up. [28]

"I know where he's hiding. He hid in the cemetery. In a tomb or in a gravedigger's hut. [29] I was almost babbling, but I felt like my mind was clear, and I just wanted to say the line.

"Let's go to the cemetery." [30]

I heard the mirror wall fall limply backwards, and the earth twitched, detached from itself. When I opened my eyes, I found myself in a boxy space, with blue sky and white clouds above my head and yellow earth under my feet.

I saw Tao Tao coming towards me.

"Lucky man, I didn't expect to see you alive." [31]

"They sentenced me to death, and then they changed their minds, and I don't know why." [32]

"They arrested me at two o'clock." [33]

"Why did you arrest you?" [34]

"I don't know, they're going to arrest everyone who thinks differently." [35]

He whispered again:

"They caught Paul." [36]

What?

"This morning. He did something stupid. He left his cousin's house on the 5th because they had an argument. There were quite a few people who were willing to hide him, but he didn't want to trouble anyone. He said, "I wanted to hide from my brother, but now that he has been arrested, I hide in the cemetery." ”[37]

Why? No, he was in the cemetery, and yes, he was there. Everything is true, whether it is a shooting or an interrogation. Mi Le and Ye Ruiyang are gone, and I didn't say a word to them before they left. And I just told the truth, hurt the strings, again. Everything around me spun around, and when I regained my senses, I found myself sitting on the floor, and I couldn't stop laughing, my eyes filled with tears. [38] Yes, I was doing so, when I heard a loud bang, and the waves disappeared in front of me, and the bright space was closed: six mirrors flew out like a machine, and fit tightly, enclosing me in this cube that resembled a coffin. This time, the image in each mirror is exactly the same: it's me from two years ago, no, not necessarily me. It was probably a string, and we both looked almost identical, and I couldn't remember what I looked like two years ago, and I couldn't remember him, but I saw the man in the mirror crying, tears coming out of one eye, and blood coming out of the other......

"Ke Ke, Ke Ke, wake up."

"Are you having nightmares? Don't be afraid, I'm here, I'm here. I'll be with you. ”

When I woke up, I found myself in a cold sweat again. It was one of the scariest dreams I've ever had, much more realistic than our performance this afternoon. Luckily, Miller heard something unusual up there and woke me up in time. I must have been crying and screaming in my dreams, talking illogical nonsense. I freaked him out, especially when he woke up and hugged him, just like he hugged Brother Chuan on stage today. After escaping this nightmare, the fear it brought with it still lingers. I saw the time on my phone, half past three. For some reason, I swiped across my phone's screen, found my emergency contacts in my address book, and poked my fingers frantically at the number. So, Miller and I heard the gentle female voice together:

"Hello, the phone number you dialed is empty, please check and dial again. Sorry...”

This number was cancelled two years ago. I was just trying to call Xianxian and tell him to run, run.

[1] Ye Ruiyang's jersey print number.

[2] Miller's jersey print.

[3] Kopewe's jersey print.

[4] Huang Minxue's jersey print number.

[5]-[38] all quoted from Sartre's The Wall,[37] with slight changes.