If it weren't for the fact that he had repeatedly confirmed with Taotao, I would never have dared to walk through that long, dark corridor at night, even if I followed behind an adult. The damp and salty cement hallway smelled of urine, worse than the boys' dormitories. Maybe it's too narrow - the old class alone can block out the road ahead and the light from the flashlight of the mobile phone flash, so the smell is hard to get away here.

"Arrive, turn a corner, and look at the road." He instructed me without looking back. As soon as he finished speaking, a dog barked frantically, as if it had spotted an intruder and wanted to report to the whole building. I couldn't see where it was, only the sound of the torn chains swaying violently, the sound of metal clashing.

"Taotao, are you there?" Old Ben knocked on the door casually. The door answered, as if it had been prepared for a long time. It creaked open, and although the light that had not been seen for a long time was slightly dim, it was incomparably precious to me who had been walking in the dark and cold corridor for a long time, and it was calling me with the temperature I imagined. Carrying the fruit basket, I almost slid in.

"Hello Mr. Liu. Ah, Koko, hello. Mom, this is my homeroom teacher, Ms. Liu. And my classmate, who is also a roommate, Ke Peiwei. Tao Tao greeted us and brought us slippers, and did not forget to introduce us to his mother. He was dressed in a neat school uniform, while her mother sat at the table, and despite the tiredness on her face, her calm smile was a clear sign that she was better.

Tao Tao pronounced my name correctly.

"Taotao, Auntie, this is for you, get well soon." I carried the fruit basket to the table not far away. As they thought, they refused to take it. The old class said to them that this was the heart of the whole class.

Taking advantage of the time when they were entangled in fruit baskets, I looked around the Taotao home. It didn't seem to be much bigger than Miller's, maybe the only lamp in the living room was filled with too many black flying insects, and the dim light shone the room down. Directly facing the door should be the washroom, with a glass door. On the left hand is an old sofa, clean and clean, with no backpacks or coats littered on it. The red skin of the sofa was half-peeled off at the armrests, as was the wall behind it, a few faint water stains climbing and expanding on it. The only round table is in front of the sofa, it is foldable, and the metal bracket underneath is slightly rusty, which is even more chilly in winter. There is no TV cabinet opposite the sofa, and naturally there is no TV. Instead, there was a working white freezer, and I could hear its fluttering, as sluggish as all summer kiosk freezers full of popsicles, or perhaps it was just the cacophony of machinery. There were some vegetables and miscellaneous plastic bags piled up on the freezer, but it wasn't messy. Further to the left was a balcony where the range hood was still whining, apparently they had just finished dinner, and there was still a smell of the food in the room after it had cooled.

There is only one door on the right, and it seems to be a one-bedroom apartment. I don't know how long they'll have to stay in this hut, or how many times they'll have to walk through that long black corridor that has no end to get to the settlement house that belongs to them. Will his little sister be scared when she walks there alone?

Hello teacher. Hello brother. I heard someone approaching us, walking as thin as a cat's footsteps. This was the little girl who was about to enter elementary school, wearing a gray sweater that did not match her size, and two small braids on her head, and she followed her to the table and poked her head out from behind her brother. Tao Tao patted her on the head, and the posture could almost be described as "loving".

Hello there. Is it Tao Tao's sister? What is your name? The old class smiled and wanted to pat her too. She ducked.

It's called Beibei. The aunt grabbed her and brought her to her. She looked at me curiously, but it made me feel a lot more cramped, and she turned her eyes to Tao Tao for help.

"Peve, you and Taotao are going to talk, I haven't seen each other for a few days. I'll talk to Taotao's mother. "The old class helped me out, and the two of them sat down in the living room. Tao Tao turned on the door and light in the room on the right, and I walked in, there was only a large bed with cartoon-style sheets, which felt like an outdated and inferior domestic cartoon. The quilt is as old as the scribbled drawings. There was no chair, and I stood in front of the bed in a daze. Tao Tao came in with a small box and closed the door. I asked him if he could sit on the bed, and he said sure, and put the locket directly on the sheets.

There were some sweets and melon seeds, and two small cakes. I suspect that the little cake was specially bought by him today. If so, my presence would be a burden on them. I don't eat cake, and those who know me well know that I only eat one snack. But Tao Tao might think that people like me would love this delicate dim sum with Japanese written on the skin, printed with snow-capped mountains and cherry blossoms, and the fluffy and soft itself that makes it feel so sweet that you lose your teeth at first glance. Maybe. What if the snack box has seaweed? Maybe I'll feel more guilty, because I'll know that he did it for me. I didn't think of him as such an important friend in the past. And I deserve the luxury of this little Japanese cake.

He literally took out the cake and brought it to me. I couldn't help but accept it, and I don't remember saying thank you a few times. He was surprised. Maybe I'm too excited.

Didn't eat it immediately. Like holding a hot water bottle or a thermos cup, I hold the cake in the palm of my hand. I asked him, have you seen Yue Yin's reports and photos? He shook his head and asked me where I looked. I said the team's WeChat public account, Yue Yin posted it in the WeChat group before. He said he was busy on weekends and didn't have time to look at his phone. I said, I don't have your phone number yet, why don't you tell me, I'll call you and leave each other a little bit. He said yes. I called the number he had reported to me, and his phone rang with a crisp birdsong. So I saw him pull a keyphone out of his pocket. It turns out that in addition to the seventy or eighty-year-old people, there are really people in the world who still use button mobile phones. Maybe he used his mother's mobile phone to read WeChat. I opened the official account and asked him to read the post. By the way, I opened the bag on my back and took out two envelopes, one large and one small.

Pretty well written, right? I asked.

What happened to Millet? He replied.

Miller ...... Miller is good. I'm a little sick, but I'm already well. Is your mom okay?

OK. Thanks to Mingming. I'm sorry and thank you very much. Can I use your phone to log in to WeChat? I want to say thank you to everyone in the group.

No problem. While he was operating, I read to him the little notes that his classmates had written to him. The cold wind outside the window made a sound from time to time, and my voice was not loud, but fortunately the wind was blocked by the glass and did not blow my words away.

"It's better to go to school." He said. It sounded strange, as if he were no longer a student. But he was obviously wearing a school uniform, exactly the same as mine.

"So come back quickly. By the way, we're going to play in the experimental middle school on the weekends. The coach will definitely give our first-year students a chance. Learn to say that after the game, I want to sing a birthday song for you and the captain. ”

By that time, his birthday would have passed for almost half a month. We've sung to him before. But anyway, I want to sing it again.

"Okay. As long as there are no accidents, I will come. He nodded at me and made a promise. Then he looked at the photo carefully and said that he would show it to his mother later.

"By the way, Keke, I want to ask you." His eyes were still on the photo, but he seemed to have thought for a long time before he opened his mouth.

You ask. I say.

"Why are you doing so well?"

Are you kidding? I almost said that. This sense of astonishment made me feel a little dazed, probably no one had ever said such things to me. In terms of scores, I generally get "good", "pretty good, could be better". Mi Le often told me, you have to think about it, the high school entrance examination is to compare with the classmates in the city. Although you are more than 200 in our row, No. 1 Middle School is one of the top schools in the city after all, and your grades must be among the best in other schools. Ye Ruiyang also encouraged me like this. He also gave the example of football, saying that don't look at some Barcelona or Real Madrid players who are substitutes in big clubs, but when they return to the national team, they are all the core of the game, and they should have a long-term and broad vision. I said to Ye Ruiyang, you are quite broad.

I don't seem to care that much about grades, at least not as much as Miller, and I study the scores and rankings of each course for half a day long, not only studying myself, but also mine, as if I can really find out what is going on. It's not that I don't study hard, but I'm quite serious about listening to lectures and doing homework. Although it is also a one-day monk to hit the clock for a day, it is similar to everyone else, but at least it will not miss a little or collide randomly, or conscientiously hit it well. If you want to talk about hard work, it has not reached the point of forgetting to sleep and eating, and hanging beams and stabbing stocks. On the weekends, we would do a little bit of extracurricular practice with Miller, and then discuss the answers, basically he told me to listen. Occasionally, I would have a flash of inspiration and solve a problem that he couldn't solve for half a day, and at that time he would pretend to hit his head against the table, with a careless expression. With a buddy here, learning is not too boring, and it is challenging and sometimes makes me look forward to it. I'm lucky.

But to say that I am very interested, it has not come to this point. That's why I'm not up or down in the whole school. The classmates in front of me were not only smarter than me, but also harder than me, so I didn't think I could really catch up with them. Mi Le always looks like a "prince and general, rather have a kind of", and wants to compete with the classmates in the experimental class.

But why does Taotao think that my grades are good? Or "so good". I still think that I see myself as an image in a mirror, blurred and not reflected who I am. However, I am not entirely true in the eyes of others, at least in my opinion. But how do I determine whether it's true or not? What kind of person am I?

In any case, for Tao Tao, my grades are good. I should think from his point of view, not above my own judgment. No one likes the kind of person who has good grades but insists that he didn't do well in the exam. I don't want to be that kind of person. Although they may really think that they did not do well in the exam.

"Actually, every student in No. 1 Middle School is very good. As long as you work hard, study hard, listen carefully in class, do your homework well, and be careful in exams, your grades will naturally be good. ”

I'm not stupid enough to say this phrase that adults are most accustomed to saying to children. What do you mean by "as long as you work hard"? Isn't Taotao working hard and studying hard? He sat upright in class, staring intently at the blackboard, as I occasionally saw when I looked around. Even if I took leave to go home and couldn't go to study at night, I never saw his name written on the list of non-homework on the small blackboard. I don't know how Taotao's grades were, at least without me. But Taotao's usual attitude and dedication are no worse than mine, why has he studied so hard for so long, and he has not had good grades for people like me who are almost "casual learning"? It's not fair.

Adults all made a promise when we were young: knowledge changes destiny. As long as you work hard to do everything, you will definitely be rewarded. Isn't Taotao really working hard enough? How hard do people have to go in order to achieve what others see as "ordinary"?

"I guess I'm better at exams, right? It is to understand the norms and routines of answering questions. Actually, I didn't learn much well, and I couldn't do some questions, but I could write some ideas and steps, and I could more or less mix up the scores. There are inevitably some things that you can't do in the exam, so you can think of it as a basketball game, not every ball can be scored, just score as much as you can......"

"Can you tell me how to do that? By the way, I want to ask you, where have you been in class lately? ”

He brought me a math paper from last week, and I could see his scores. I also took this test once two years ago, and it was a mid-term exam. Earlier, when I saw this kind of score, my father was going to scold me after signing the paper. Earlier, in order to help me, Xianxian changed the name on my test paper to his. This can't fool people at all, my handwriting with chords is not like it at all, and the scribbled, crooked words are seen through at a glance. He thought I had secretly changed my brother's roll, so he tore it in a fit of rage and hit me. I ran into the room crying and smothered myself under my pillow, but I could still hear Xianxian explaining to my dad. He didn't beat him, didn't even scold him, but told him, what will your brother do after this achievement? I'm going to sweep the streets. Can you kid help him change his name, and can you still help him take the college entrance examination? Can you help him go to college? Before, I was just a little aggrieved, and when I heard this, I was so angry. When I walked into the door, I slammed into the room and picked up the pillow and smashed him, smashing him like a madman, scolding and scolding, as if I wanted him to know how much it hurt for my dad to hit me. He didn't fight back. If he wants to fight back, I'm sure I'll be beaten again. He just locked the door before my dad heard the agitation rush over and knock on the door. He scolded me through the door, demanded that I release my brother immediately, and threatened to kick me out of the house and keep one in the house. The more he talked about me, the more angry I became, smashing and crying, tired, throwing away the pillow, slumping to the ground panting and snorting. You've killed me, I glared at him. He crouched down and hugged me from behind. I saw that his eyes were also red, and he said to me, what's wrong with sweeping the street, you have to sweep, let's sweep together.

But two years ago, when I took the paper to my dad for signing, he didn't beat me, he didn't scold me, and he didn't get angry. He just patted my head with his big hand and said that he would take the test well next time.

I talked to Tao Tao about the rules and techniques, but I felt that this kind of help was quite limited. Obviously, he got this score more because he didn't grasp some important knowledge points, so I struggled to explain the next few big questions. Miller talks to me about the topic, and I can always understand it at one point, and I seem to have a good heart. In fact, we know all the formulas and theorems. It's like communicating with each other on the pitch, a "triangle" or a "cross" can tell your teammates what they intended. However, those who don't understand the game of football must sound like a fog. Tao Tao does not have a good grasp of those knowledge points themselves, let alone how to use them.

"Didn't your elementary school teacher talk about this theorem?" I asked. He tilted his head and thought about it carefully, as if there really wasn't.

Trouble. The old class just acquiesced that the students understood, so they didn't talk about it in class, after all, "the students of No. 1 Middle School are excellent". He always said that a class is only 45 minutes, and he always feels that there is not enough time, so he will not give his precious class time to the content that has been taught in elementary school.

What's more troublesome is to help him read the English test papers. Tao Tao does not know phonetic transcription. He said that the primary school English teachers only dictated and spoke about the topics, and hardly taught them spoken English. It's too bad, though not an accident. Miller told me that his English name can be read in four ways by four teachers. Some teachers are not complimented by their own speaking skills, and many students cannot find an environment to practice speaking outside of the classroom, and their parents may only know 26 letters and cannot tutor them. I don't know phonetic transcription, and I don't seem to have any other way to learn than rote memorization – I can't even pronounce words, let alone texts. I read one of the options for a multiple-choice question, congratulation, and Tao Tao suddenly interrupted me and said you read it again. I was nervous, as if I had become a teacher and was reading the purest standard of English in the world. After reluctantly reciting, he wrote down on the test paper "Kangue is out of thunder". I was sad and thought about what to do while helping him mark the key points in the textbook that the teacher had said. I heard Miller say that there is a boy in their class, who is very good at math and Chinese, but he is very poor in English. He is also from other provinces, and they only learned English in the fifth grade, so the foundation is relatively weak, and the English of the entrance exam is only passed. But he was able to score 80 points in the midterm exam, because he hired a one-on-one tutor on the weekend to tutor English, and he always pestered the teacher to ask questions during the afternoon. With such an attitude, it is not surprising that we can improve.

But not everyone can hire a tutor, and not everyone has a personality that makes them stick to the teacher. Everyone is running hard, but everyone's starting line is not exactly together. How is it good? Tao Tao can at least talk to me, but what about the classmates who are similar to him, or even inferior to him? One is small, but the world is big. The old class always said that Jiang Yuan has 50,000 people taking the high school entrance examination every year, and one point is how many people. 50,000 is not a number, that's 50,000 junior high school students like me, and behind it are 50,000 families. Where am I? Where is Tao Tao? Where are the people in front of us and behind us? Did they all gain the knowledge to change their fate from school? I don't know. There is a poet who has lived for forty years, and he doesn't know what he is doing in the world.

"That's pretty much it. You're going back to school tomorrow, right? When the time comes, if you have something that you can't do, just ask me or Ye Ruiyang directly. Boss Ye also wanted to come today, but Lao Liu's car couldn't be stuffed. If we don't understand, we go back to the dormitory and ask Miller together. After marking the point, I closed the textbook and handed it back to him.

"Thank you." He thanked me again, "but ......"

"Huh?"

"I'm a little scared of Miller."

"What?" That's the most incredible quote I've heard tonight.

"It's just that Miller's results are too good. I didn't dare to ask him questions, I always thought it would delay his time, and I asked too simply. The main reason is that I'm too stupid to study......"

"Why!" I suddenly raised my voice, and the adults outside the door might have been startled when they heard it. Tao Tao looked at me with a puzzled look like a small animal, and I shook my head and waved my hand again and again, indicating that I was embarrassed.

"You're not stupid. It's just that I did a mediocre test this time, and I've done this before. ”

"But not once or twice......"

"So what does that mean? It's all in the past, it's time to turn the page. You should pay attention to the next exam. ”

Not to mention, I've learned a lot of adult words. Although I didn't listen to it very seriously, or even like it, I actually wrote it all down. Miller was right, we were both familiar with and mastered the words of adults.

He nodded as if he understood something, as if he had understood something, and he didn't know if he accepted my words. I still haven't really touched his heart, so I can only tell him how to use the Pythagorean theorem, and the word characteristic can be remembered from character......

"You don't have to be afraid of Millet...... I got to know him, he was very helpful. Everyone is a classmate, so you don't have to be so unfamiliar. Rest assured. "I don't know if my words are useful. It seems that classmates with good grades will inevitably seem a little unapproachable, and if I hadn't been in the same room as Miller, maybe I would have regarded him as a primary school bully, "stay away". Am I too inferior? Or is it just a normal human reaction. In the team, I can't handle Mu Zheng very well, and I don't know how to greet him. Even though he was very humble and polite, his top teammates of the same age seemed to have an aura that prevented me from getting close to him.

No, maybe it's just that I'm too timid. The captain and Yan Xi were also very good, but they didn't give me this sense of awe. I didn't approach them either. There is always a distance between people, and perhaps only by getting close enough can the gap be eliminated. But it takes a lot of effort to get close to each other. There is never a natural fate, and more people just stay for a short time and leave each other's lives. It's hard to keep someone in your memory, and it's even harder to keep him around.

Three years from now, will Tao Tao and I still be in the same class, the same team, and the same school? Would he want me to be someone who was always around?

"Thank you so much. Keko, I'm so happy to be your friend. It seems that my words moved him, and inadvertently made him build a trust in me, and this trust is also associated with Mi Le and Ye Ruiyang. Maybe it was already that last week when we got together to sing his birthday song for him. Tao Tao saw me as his friend, which made me very excited and nervous at the same time. I've always been afraid of people getting too close to me, even though I love or crave kindness from others.

"Actually, when Miller taught me how to write checks, I liked him very much. But I'm just embarrassed, after all, our grades are too bad, and we are good students......"

"Don't think so. We didn't become friends because of test scores. You're awesome. By the way, maybe writing a check is the beginning of our great friendship, right? We are on one front. ”

We laughed. I still remember the Brazilian teams that Miller searched for, Fluminense, Gremio, Vasco da Gama, Chapecoense, all of them were a bit awkward to read. I always remember this messy, inconsequential thing. I don't know what the instructor's expression was on his face after seeing these inspections, but he really had a good temper if he didn't punish us for running another ten laps.

The door was gently pushed open. Beibei leaned out half of her body from there and asked her brother if he had finished talking. I don't know how long she hid behind the door. Seeing that we nodded, she ran briskly to the bed, and stared at me curiously again, as if she had never seen a boy other than her brother.

I subconsciously handed her the small cake that I had been holding in my hand. She took it and tore open the package.

"Hey, this is for guests." Tao Tao touched her little head.

"It's okay, I've had a pretty good night's meal. Little sister can eat as much as she wants. I said to Tao Tao.

"Thank you, brother." She smiled at me, so polite, who doesn't love a kid like that?

"Ah, yes, I have a big mango here. Let's divide it up for the three of us! ”

When I pulled it out, I still had the aroma of mango lingering in my bag. Tao Tao brought a plate and a fruit knife, he cut a piece, I poked a piece with a toothpick and handed it to my little sister. She swallowed the rubber-larger flesh one by one, and the corners of her mouth were covered with yellow juice. But it didn't take long for her to say, don't patronize me, you two eat too. It's okay, the mango is big. I said, looking at each other and smiling in tacit understanding. In the end, the two of us split the mango pit in half, and one of us held half of it and gnawed it, and our hands were sticky, and we didn't bite much in the end.

The large, plump mango was gone, leaving only the golden skin hanging and the smell of fruit that surrounded the small room. It is bright. Hopefully this cottage will be bright for a long time to come.