It still rings in my ears to this day, sin deserves death, sin deserves death.

2014, dizzying afternoon.

Here you are, Ahn Kwon.

Ahn Kwon walked down the corridor in a blood-red shirt, and everyone's eyes stayed on his face, that handsome face.

An Quan is still so handsome.

A delicate sense of youth. Resurrection.

I couldn't sleep almost every night and dreamed that he was playing with a woman.

Play with cute girls, beautiful girls, smart and clever girls.

At this moment my heart is the daughter of Satan.

No matter how Lucifer kills me, I will be resurrected.

I struggled for six years for that class leader, and I kept observing him. From the first time he became a man and the first time he worked, the first time he became a scumbag, I was watching him.

I'm just a pervert.

I soaked myself in the water, struggled and resisted, I lay in the bathtub and enjoyed drowning, and then in the moment of my dying, I thought of his face.

Then I cried.

You're still giggling there for nothing, my mom came running over and scolded me, and I locked the bathroom door.

I stayed inside and saw the smoke rising from the tub, the bubbles rising from the shower gel.

Enjoy the solitude of the moment, and my victory.

The song has a big bang "loser" in it.

Then cut your wrists.

Mom slammed open the door because she saw the bright red and me lying in the cold water, and I begged my mother in the hospital not to take me to a psychiatric hospital, and I would never cut my wrists again.

My mother warned me that she wouldn't care if she caused any more trouble.

Later, I drank oleander water, but the pungent smell of oleander made me vomit immediately. I cleaned up the green juice when nothing happened.

Later, I jumped off the building, and my mother finally sent me to the hospital, and the second time I was hospitalized, I didn't cry or make a fuss, I didn't cry or laugh, just a little motion sickness and started retching. My dad saw me and thought I was pregnant, because I was 20 years old at the time, and my dad asked the doctor, doctor, how was the medical check-up, is my daughter pregnant? Pregnant you are big! My mom started to lecture my dad about whether she would be sent to the hospital if she was pregnant. The head doesn't want to worry about it.

I looked at the parents coldly because I was going to be hospitalized here for three months.

Those who are hospitalized here may be sinners.

I saw with my own eyes a glamorous woman, tied up with five flowers, singing love songs and crying in her mouth.

I saw with my own eyes a madman sitting on a stool with a lock because of a genetic disease, urinating all over the floor.

I saw my aunt who graduated from Tsinghua University and said, "God, what kind of sin have I committed?" Why are they violating me, why can't you eat peach-flavored sugar.

I was hospitalized in the autumn this time, and I was admitted in October, and I spent my birthday in the hospital and the Spring Festival.

The moon in the Mid-Autumn Festival is very beautiful, and sometimes the TV does not receive a signal, so I ate bullfrogs tonight, and my mother's fried bullfrogs were packed and brought to the hospital.

Mom wanted me to change, but Mom, Rose Boy, said, "No one can change me." ”

Roses are beautiful but full of thorns, we are a speck of dust, once lived.

But there are times when the dust settles, and the moon is also composed of a grain of dust.

"Turn Zhu Ge, low Qihu, shine sleeplessly, there should be no hatred, when can I be round to another time."

The moon of the Mid-Autumn Festival is big.

In order to be discharged from the hospital, I have been pretending to be a normal person in a mental hospital.

After I saw that they were normal but stupid, human nature and this kind of thing, the most feared thing was to say and do it.

The crazy are afraid of being stunned, the stunned are afraid of the horizontal, and the horizontal are afraid of dying.

Buy food with your own money, then play with their phones when you have friends, watch the news every day and get ready to be discharged.

On my birthday, I made a wish for mental illness to get better, and suddenly I felt that the world was very strange, as if I had connected to the normal world, with no voice in my head, no Satan, no demons, no fallen angels. A rare leisure.

"Enough, I don't want to hear it."

"Maniac."

The voice of my heart has been transmitted to the end.

"Because this world is a king and a loser."

"How can the weak be king?"

"How can he be?"

This familiar voice—Safavid.

"He's back."

He wears a white sweater and gray slacks.

The round face shape is like a finely carved jade.

A pair of peach blossom eyes.

Laughing Mimi's.

Very clean.

During his lunch break in the psychiatric hospital, he also came to visit me.

The nurse next to me felt very strange how I smiled at the air.

I said it was okay, and the nurse said go to the lunch break.

The next day, the only mirror at the nurses' station was shattered.

I asked why they said the mirror suddenly cracked, so they broke it.

Could it be a ghost? I asked.

There are no ghosts in this world. The nurse replied.

I touched the mirror, and it was flipping, as if I had entered a mysterious space again.

On the third day, many people went to look in the mirror, then the nurse drove people away, and the mentally ill went to play cards.

Soon, I couldn't sleep again, and I remembered that I was in a junior college and almost ran naked in the back street.

At that time, Ahn Kwon and Safi died once.

They were gone, and the bodies were out of sight.

The backstreet is such a big tree.

My mom took me away from college.

Lucifer is gone after all the destruction.

In 2018, I spent three months in a country hospital.

I was hungry, I took the two drugs olanzapine and risperidone, I was very hungry and couldn't sleep.

In the small space, I saw the sunset, the angel Gabriel in a white dress, and Lilith with red hair like a flame.

Her washed hair was like a flame in her heart.

Sick not light?

Be.

There are very abnormal people in the rural psychiatric hospitals.

Some said they had died many times, some saw zombies, some ate dung, and some were sent in by cutting off their little thumbs.

And I, in a psychiatric hospital, took off my clothes and went crazy.

The dean is making a prescription, which is not easy.

Sometimes it's scary, and it's funny to think about it later.

For example, the sky is so pale that you can't see blue and clouds, and the house number of each room says morgue on the fork.

The water house is paradise.

There is a cat meow at night.

Rats squeak.

The moon at night is like an oil painting, dotted with a few stars.

The earth is flat, really.

Otherwise, the moon would not be like an oil painting, and the sky would not be as white as rice paper.

Somebody will love me,' really.

Otherwise, we wouldn't have seen so many resurrected two-dimensional beings.

But lovers love themselves.

Shine without sleep.

Safavid, Anquan, I miss you so much.

I'm going to grow up and get out of here.

After the robbery, the children are varied.

(What we often call "variety" is the only way for children to be relegated to the lower realm, they need to pass 5 gates, 8 levels, and go through many hardships to give birth to a family with good conditions.) Although they have been smart and clever since childhood, their academic performance is not satisfactory. Heavy minds and general susceptibility to mental illnesses are all tribulations arranged by the heavenly realm, in order to make them go through the hardships and dangers of the world, despair of life, and do not want to stay in the world for a long time.

Some of them can go to high school or college, but they are prone to depression, mania, hallucinations and other problems in their junior or freshman year of high school, and some will even run away from home, or even have accidents because of this. At the same time, it is difficult for most of them to have a relationship, and the road to marriage is even more difficult. ）

Robbery!!!

Xiao Yukui, come on.

This is the blessing of Safavid and An Quan, who they said to me the moment I signed the contract.