The 35th day of your departure

In the days since you left, I have been thinking about why such a misfortune happened, and I have carefully recalled one scene after another, trying to find a satisfactory answer from these memories.

I thought about it for a long, long time, and sure enough, the hard work paid off, and finally I finally found it, but I didn't expect the culprit to be myself, but I wasn't too disappointed, which is also a reasonable thing for me.

You heard it right.

I'm not wrong, really!

Don't worry, listen to me tell you slowly.

I think there must be a certain reason for Li Tifu's sudden impulsiveness.

Either it needs a fuse, or it takes time to accumulate slowly, or it may happen under the coincidence of a specific occasion.

So what Li Tifu did to you can't be the result of his impulse.

I remember very well the day you came back and saw me doing my laundry and was angry with me.

Yes!

No, it's the day after that.

You left home early in the morning.

After eating breakfast in the morning, Li Tifu said that he had a parent-teacher meeting at his school today.

I thought he was going to let me go to his parent-teacher conference, but it turned out that he wanted you to go.

He wanted me to tell you, and I repeated it many times that I must tell you that you must go to his parent-teacher conference in person.

But you know what?

I didn't tell you.

I know that if you need to attend our son's parent-teacher conference, even if you are busy, you will definitely make time to attend.

It's just that I was worried that it would affect your working hours, so I didn't tell you, and I saw that you left the house early in the morning, and I was even more worried that it would affect your work, so I finally decided that I would go myself, and I thought it would be better for me to go than to go at all.

When I got dressed and was about to go out, I was probably guilty of an old mistake, and suddenly my eyes went dark and I sat down on the ground.

I think I should take a break for a while, it will get better, and then I will go out when I get better.

Who knew that a sitting seat would be a day.

I was in a cold sweat, my limbs were sore, and my head was hot.

Ay!

Do you know what!?

How I would love to accompany this child to his parent-teacher conferences.

I know that this is very important for Li Tifu, and this is the last parent-teacher meeting of his junior high school career!

It's just that I can't help it, I hate myself, I hate myself for being so weak, I hate myself that these dirty diseases will be entangled in my body and won't let go of me.

I was going to go, Umar, I was going to go with my teeth gritted.

Later, I realized that it was this incident that became the fuse for the whole thing, and I think that's it.

I didn't go to Li Tifu's parent-teacher conference, Li Tifu didn't know the real situation, he must hate us to death!

You seemed to be drunk that night, and you criticized me, and this kid happened to see it.

Things are slowly being pushed into the abyss.

That day, Li Tifu happened to see the picture that looked like I was being abused by you.

In addition, before you came back that day, when I fainted, my face seemed to be green and swollen somewhere, which happened to be seen by Li Tifu, and the whole thing seemed to be arranged in advance, one after another, and there was evidence, it was really incredible.

And what makes me wonder even now is where your head hit, I can't figure it out now.

I went to every corner of the house to watch the spot where you fell, but I couldn't really guess where your head was hit.

I'm really sorry for you, it's my fault that turned into this series of tragedies.

I'm sorry!!!

I'm the one who says I'm sorry!

Mother!

Father!!

I'm sorry for you, Li Tifu cried loudly, crying that was so embarrassed that he kept saying loudly to his parents

"I'm sorry!"

Although I don't know what caused my father to die, you said that he died of a heart attack.

I guess at that time you were taking care of my feelings and not letting me have a psychological burden, and I understand now, I understand it all.

I saw it, and as I pushed it, I saw the back of my father's head hit the coffee table in our living room.

I'm sorry!

Father!

It's all my own fault, it's that I'm too obscene, it's that I'm too naïve.

Mother!

Why should I care about those people!

Why should I care what they say?

I should live a little more openly, live a little more clearly, and it won't turn into such a tragedy.

I'm the ultimate culprit, I'm sorry I know.

Mother!

Father!

I'm the one who pushed you into the abyss, I'm sorry!

Father!!!!

Li Tifu repeated the shouting of "I'm sorry" no less than ten times.

Li Tifu shouted and sighed incessantly.

For him, the reversal of the whole thing came so suddenly, and it came at a very good time.

It's so strange, but it's also so clear.

Li Tifu began to blame himself and hate himself.

After Li Tifu shouted sorry, he began to cry out loud.

Li Tifu was very sad and regretted after learning the truth of the whole thing.

Li Tifu cried and stared at the notebook on the book for a long, long time.

After crying and crying, Li Tifu now quietly looked at the notebook in his hand and fell into a long contemplation.

Sitting in place, shaking his head constantly, clenching his fists, his eyes revealing remorse, as if he wanted to tear himself apart now, he almost fanned himself.