Lin Kongkong clasped Li Shunjuan's hands tightly, "Mom, I'm sorry, I'm late." ”

"It wasn't too late, I knew you were going to come to see me, you were going to come." Li Shunjuan looked at Lin Kongkong, and said to the people beside her, "You all go out first!" ”

There were only two of them left in the room, Li Shunjuan hooked the corners of her lips, smiled slightly, and told the past: "I still remember when you first arrived at Ji's house, you were not yet 18 years old at that time, so thin, so stubborn, the clothes I sent you, the things I made for you, you always refused without thinking about it, and always looked at me vigilantly." ”

Lin Kongkong thought of himself at that time, he was really inexplicably hostile to her, always felt that she was a bad person, always guarded against her, and was very afraid of her.

"I was young and ignorant at that time......"

"But I like you very much, I like it when we meet, your eyes are very clear, and it is obvious that you like and dislike, although there is some loneliness, but you are very kind-hearted. Remember when you first arrived, you couldn't sleep well? I always have nightmares, and I always cry in the middle of the night and call my mother ......"

Lin Kongkong nodded, remembering that he had just arrived at Ji's house, during the day, she was cautious and walking on thin ice, and at night she was afraid of everything strange around her, and her mother's death also hit her hard, so at that time, she was a little trembling in what she did.

"Remember, especially when it rains, I don't dare to sleep at all."

Li Shunjuan's thoughts seemed to have completely returned to that time, and her eyes flashed with soft waves: "Every time you have nightmares, I will stay with you, at first you looked at me with very defensive eyes, and then you began to gradually accept me." When I sleep next to you, you become at ease, I cook for you to eat, you always smile at me, and when your father arranges you to do something, you always look at me with trust, as if asking for my opinion...... I gradually realized that I really can't live without you, and I treat you as if you were my own daughter. I'm afraid that you will be wronged, I'm afraid that you will be unhappy, I know that you like that boy from the Bai family, so I try to give you a little more time to get along. ”

Lin Kongkong thought of the past, remembered the graceful and luxurious, dignified and beautiful she at that time, and everything she had done for herself, her eyes were sour. But she knew she couldn't cry, she shouldn't show sadness in front of her, she had to laugh to be happy.

"I never thought you would be so nice to me, Mom, thank you! I really appreciate the love you have given me. ”

"I know you rely on me a lot and trust me very much, but Mengmeng, Jin Wuzu is not perfect, I made a mistake, can you forgive me?"

Lin Kongkong looked at her in confusion, in his impression, she rarely went out except for necessary entertainment. Every day, in addition to managing the inner house, it is flower arrangement and embroidery. What will she do with such a gentle temperament and a simple life? What mistakes can be made?

"People make mistakes sometimes, and when they do something wrong, they make mistakes again and again."

Li Shunjuan pointed to the cabinet next to her with a lonely expression, Lin Kongkong understood, stepped forward to open it, and found that there was a cowhide file bag inside, which was swollen and bulging, as if it contained a lot of things.

"Open it and take a look."

"What is this?"

"Here are the letters that Meng Meng left for Bai Chenfeng before the heart exchange surgery, as well as my diary, some of my own savings, and ...... The token of your father's and your mother's commitment, the painting painted on the edge of the West Lake, is now handed over to you. ”

Lin Kongkong was stunned in place, and her mind was bombarded with her first sentence, there is a letter left by her sister to Xiaobai? In the depths of Lin Kongkong's heart, she was very afraid of mentioning her sister, the real Ji Mengmeng.

Because, she knew that it was a girl that Xiaobai really liked, and it was different from Bai Ting or Zuo Qingyun. For him, it is the most beautiful memory in his heart, the white rose forever. And if she hadn't borrowed her identity at the beginning, she wouldn't have been able to get together with Xiaobai, and she wouldn't be where she is today.

He and Xiaobai have always had no open and honest talk about their sister. Because, things are really too long, she has been Ji Mengmeng for ten years, Xiaobai can't figure it out, and she can't figure it out. Sometimes she doesn't want to think about those things, because, even if Xiaobai likes her sister again, her sister has passed away after all, and she doesn't need to be serious with a dead person.

And she was at fault first, even if Xiaobai regarded her as a sister, what could she do? After so many years of living with him and having a baby with him, it was her, not his sister, and these were enough for her.

Although Xiaobai has a cold temperament, she is very good to her, and in the years they have been together, as long as they are by his side, she has always been taken care of. Although he is sometimes awkward and does not say some nice words to coax her, she still knows that he cares about her and cherishes her. It's just that she can't forget his reaction when he knew she wasn't his sister. said such heartless words, and even, left her alone in a completely unfamiliar place.

Sometimes it's not that she doesn't want to seek an answer, it's that she doesn't dare, she's afraid, she's really afraid. is afraid that what he says will not be acceptable to him, and he is also afraid that his aggressiveness will put him in a dilemma. Life is so short, if the truth will only hurt each other, then it's better not to make everything so clear, just accompany like this, and go on like this, it's also good.

Lin Kongkong took out the same things inside, first a passbook, she didn't open it, but handed it directly to Li Shunjuan, "Mom, this is your savings, I can't ask for it." ”

"This was originally my own dowry for you, and you also know that I have no children in my life, since you came to the Ji family, I have regarded you as my own daughter. Now that I'm dying, keeping it is also a piece of waste paper, so naturally it will be handed over to you, so you don't have to excuse yourself. ”

Lin Kongkong still felt that it was inappropriate, she shook her head and refused: "After you got sick, your uncle has been taking care of you, you might as well leave this to him!" ”

"Silly boy, he's not short of money, and you need it badly. Although this amount is not a huge amount, it is not a small amount, and after the fall of the Ji family, your life should be very difficult. It's better to leave it behind, in case that kid from the Bai family treats you badly, or bullies you, you always have a way back, don't you? In this life, women cannot fully trust men, they must be financially independent, and basic living security must still be available. And aren't you pregnant now? I don't think I'm blessed to wait until the child is born, so let's take it as my red envelope for this child! ”

"Okay, I'll take this." Lin Kongkong spoke, and took the letter that her sister wrote to Bai Chenfeng, she rubbed it lightly with her hand, but she didn't have the courage to open it, and she also felt that she didn't need to open it, "You give me this, I should ...... How to deal with it? ”

"I see the engagement ring on your hand, and since you are going to marry him, it should be up to you to decide whether to give him that letter or not."

Lin Kongkong was silent, having said that, it was just that if he didn't give him this letter, he would feel uneasy. After all, this was left for him by his sister on the eve of the operation, and I think my sister should be desperate at that time. And not being able to see her for the last time is also an eternal wound in Xiaobai's heart. The girl he likes has passed away a long time ago, but he only learned about it more than ten years later, maybe this letter can really make up for the regrets in his heart.

But if he really gave him this letter, it would inevitably cause cracks in the current peaceful life of the two. This most sensitive topic is the one that neither of them dares to touch, and it is buried in life*. And this letter will be like *, causing an uproar in the back.

"But...... How can I withhold his letters? ”

Li Shunjuan looked at her clearly, "This letter should not cause your psychological burden, you don't have pressure, do it by your own heart." Give it to him if you want to, don't give it if you don't want to, don't think about anything else. What last words, what morals, what wishes, in fact, it doesn't matter at all. People should think about themselves in this life, and they should be selfish, after all, no one is a Buddha, and there is no responsibility to purify sentient beings. ”

Lin Kongkong listened to her words and felt that Li Shunjuan really wanted to open it now. When I often feel sad and overwhelmed, it is actually because I put too much pressure on myself and think too much, which often goes against my own thoughts.

Forget it, this matter is not something that can be thought out for a while, so let's pick a suitable time and sit together and have a good talk!

Finally, there was a thick diary and a scroll of paintings, which could be seen to be some years old, and must have been read often. Because, there are some rolls in the corners of the notebook, and the paper is also a little yellowed. As for the painting, it must be a token of love between his father and mother, Lin Kongkong was afraid of provoking Li Shunjuan's sadness, so he didn't open the painting, but put it in a brown paper file bag, ready to take it back and look at it again.

Li Shunjuan looked at her movements, knew what she was thinking, and smiled slightly, in fact, she had completely seen it now. are all people who are going to die, and suddenly feel that those wind and snow are getting farther and farther away from her, and they are dreaming of life.

Lin Kongkong picked up the diary, rubbed his fingers on it a few times, and asked Li Shunjuan: "Is this your diary?" ”

"Yes, this is my diary, which records in detail my life after marrying into the Ji family. Every time my life is slightly different, I write here, or rather, it should be the truest portrayal of my life. I'll give it to you as a souvenir! ”