If you want to convince me to believe something or do something, you must grasp the following three elements:

1. Gotta make me understand what you're talking about. You have to speak from my point of view.

2. Your argument must be sufficient to make it difficult for me to refute.

3. Convince me at the same time, and must match my needs and desires.

Of the three elements, the third is the most important. Because even if you stand in my position, the arguments are good and the logic is perfect, but it doesn't meet my needs, so it doesn't matter if I accept it or not.

Speaking of which, let's take an example to illustrate that at a certain time on the earth, people believed that the sun revolved around the earth until a certain genius appeared, and he put forward the heliocentric theory to introduce people to the solar system and prove that the earth revolves around the sun. At the time, his theories were solid and strong, and there was no strong evidence to refute him.

However, many people are not interested in this fact, because it will not affect their lives if they accept it or not, and the fact that the earth revolves around the sun is not even as important as the fact that people have to eat.

Until one day, someone said, "Hey, this theory is useful, the earth is round, we don't have to worry about not being able to return home from our voyages, and we can find new lands and create new wealth, so as to solve our hunger dilemma, this is our hope." ”

Therefore, the logic is not perfect, the argument is insufficient, and it depends on whether the needs of the other party can be met. If you can't, say nothing.

XIII. The power of love.

People always care a little more about themselves. So, we don't care about anything. We must have the attitude of a game, as a fantasy world, take a step back and open the sky, don't be so strong, because when it comes to our own situation, we will always feel all kinds of emotions, and it is inevitable to be bound by this power.

Here's a well-known example, let's say I owe a huge amount of money right now, and another friend who has a gaming attitude.

Me: "It's annoying. What should I do? I still owe so much money. ”

"Don't worry, it's your creditors who should be worried. It's kind of funny, but he really understands the situation between the two sides in this situation.

Now, let's talk about the three major elements of time.

Now that we have become gods, we have a long time, but there is a limit to what we have, and many things have time limits. So, we need to analyze the impact of time on negotiations.

Many people set a time for the start and end of the negotiation, and the time limit for closing the deal is basically the last time. For example, if we start to practice seriously in the last two months of the exam, because we will set a boundary for ourselves.

Procrastinate. Everywhere, so, in the negotiation process. We don't expect the other side to make concessions at the beginning, but to increase ourselves. Lower the other party's deadlines so you can put time on them. For example, in the First World War. The opponent already knew from the first encounter that my fiery fury would take one second, so he had to make moves within that time, as his special move would most likely take two seconds, or more.

No matter how indifferent the two sides are, as long as they are participants in the negotiations, they will have their own deadlines, and knowing this information, they can control the negotiations and let others be led by our noses. ”

On a certain solid planet, Red Lotus sat cross-legged, slowly exhaled a puff of smoke, and smiled all over her face: "Do you feel dizzy when you listen to this?"

Sabu shook his head and lit a cigarette: "Your thinking is right, we have learned how the universe works before, but these celestial bodies have no mind after all, just like the universe, the distribution of celestial bodies is only partial. As long as we understand the various knowledge of human beings, we can have a more complete understanding of the universe and thus comprehend the creation of gods. ”

After creating a large blue water balloon with a radius of 10,000 meters, Wanrou used the light element to condense a small sun, completely isolating the harsh environment outside, and the lush flowers and plants exude a faint fragrance, like a small world.

"Our cultivation is too fast, and our Demon Moon is also doing things more extremely, perhaps, in the long run, this may not be a good thing, if we don't clear our minds, it is likely to be ruined. ”

Alyssa snatched the cigarette in Honglian's stunned eyes and took a puff, then coughed dryly twice and spit out a puff of smoke rings: "We are actually involuntarily, as you said, negotiations are everywhere." In the past few years in the Nine Kingdoms, we have been weak and have always wanted to take revenge, and what we lack is effective negotiation skills, except for the reasons of enlightenment. The Sky Continent has not been able to unite for thousands of years, the Demon Race is rampant, our Demon Moon wants to expel the Demon Clan, we must unite the major forces, if we are still as reckless as before, it will only make the result worse. ”

"Yes, what we can contact now are the orcs and the natural elves, I can't be 100% sure that they will come, the Ten Thousand Dragons' Nest can't escape, the Dark Holy See is in turmoil, the attitude of the five empires is unclear, we are quite passive. ”

"Well, husband, hurry up, when we are amazing, go back and turn the world upside down. ”

"By the way, you put "Guiguzi", "Tao Te Ching", and "Sun Tzu's Art of War" ...... Leave it to Tianhao, can you tell us about it? If he is allowed to study alone, I am afraid that it will be a bit difficult, and if something happens to him, our position as a military advisor will be vacant. ”

"Let's look at it then, we will now move on to negotiations, and we talked about the three elements before, time, information, and power, and now we will focus on information. ”

After seeing the red lotus sit down, all the demon giants also sat together, sorting out their thoughts on this planet where birds don't, at least they won't worry about anyone disturbing them.

"Information is at the center of things, and it tends to influence our judgment of things. Shaping our final decisions, we rarely do so in a way that prepares for a rainy day. Almost always crammed when needed. We cannot treat negotiations one-sidedly, a meaningful interactive event. It's not just one thing, it's a dynamic process that is made up of many events.

Therefore, before we negotiate, we need to anticipate the end time of the negotiation, grasp the time, and then systematically collect information, so that we can take the initiative and contain the opponent.

So how do we collect information?

First, the sooner you collect it, the better. The second is to pretend to be stupid, the more weak and incompetent and ignorant we are, the more information we can get, if we pretend to know everything, how can the other party sue us?

Not only that, but we need to be clear about who we want to collect, and we want to collect anyone who has been in contact with an opponent, such as his parents, wife, children, siblings, bosses, subordinates, and so on. Especially those we ignore. It's easiest to get information.

Of course, there is another important source, and that is the competitors of the opponent, as the saying goes. The people who know themselves best are often their enemies. And because the enemy of the enemy is the friend, so. This source of information is even more important.

While we pretend to be stupid, we must observe the opponent's words, behaviors, and unconscious cues. This is a very important source of information. It's like when we were babies, even though we couldn't speak. But we have an innate ability to cry, to frown, to smile, to blink, to touch with our hands, which is called body language, and through it we are able to get what we want.

Putting aside factors such as family affection, we analyze from the perspective of negotiation alone, parents or other people are our negotiation opponents, and persistent crying will cause the opponent to be upset, and he wants to end the negotiation as soon as possible. "They will also be controlled by us, they will convince themselves, they will constantly guess our intentions, and they will make all kinds of concessions to meet our needs.

Therefore, as a qualified negotiator, we must always pay attention to these non-verbal messages, often a casual gesture can betray the real needs of the other party. In other words, what the buyer wants to know most is the seller's lowest price, and the seller wants to know the highest price that the buyer can offer. ”

"Okay, we've explained the three elements of negotiation in more detail, and now, let's take a look at the way of negotiation. In our case, negotiators are not a decent profession, and people tend to think of them as lowly salesmen, or a group of people who will do whatever it takes to plunder the fruits of innocent victims, as in the scheming book "Guiguzi". Actually, it depends on whether the person is being used for good or evil, and most negotiators are not engaged in a way that meets my needs, your needs, and the needs of the organization.

Negotiations can be broadly divided into two categories, one is competitive, that is, I win, you lose, and the other is a win-win model of mutual benefit. This can be applied to any single thing.

In competitive negotiations, those who advocate the pursuit of results at any cost, regardless of the bad results that will be brought to the other party. Although I do not advocate that we adopt this approach, we must also understand that we will not be killed by mistake.

Our Demon Moon has been through ups and downs for decades, and we have indeed made a lot of mistakes, in the past few years of aggrieved time in the Nine Great Kingdoms, I have woken up a little, if you want to gain a foothold in the Sky Continent, or even break out of the Sky Continent and conquer the universe, if you deal with it in the previous brutal way, I am afraid it will not last long. There will be fewer and fewer people who will agree with us, and our risks will not be shared, and the future will be very worrying. Only by truly giving, can we go further.

Satisfying oneself and negotiating at any cost, such people often regard the whole world as a battlefield, where there is competition and confrontation everywhere. In order to enter a better academy, accumulate more wealth, and compete for cultivation resources, they tried their best to treat everyone as their opponent and enemy. (To be continued......)