The first time I read the girl's masterpiece was from the biography "West Wind Jue", the article described the woman behind a successful man through the background of the killing of the rivers and lakes, which made people's eyes shine: it turns out that martial arts can still be written like this, haha! I really like Xie Junhe's ruffian and bad, I can guess the pain and pain he has experienced, I guess the girl will give him some memories in the future story, right?

- Shade World

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Try to comment on "The Stormy Waves of the Long River"——

The beginning of this article is extraordinary, the ordinary riverside town, the old swordsmith, and the mysterious stranger immediately attract us to this strange river and lake, a ronin, a broken sword, just like the article says...... The sharper the weapon, the more tragic its fate is.

Sure enough, the rivers and lakes that have been quiet for a long time, because of a murder, will be smoked in the beacon fire ridge, and the rivers and lakes will no longer be lonely. What kind of conspiracy will the ruthless Qin Dashao have? Chu Tao seems to have encountered a great disaster, how will he resolve it, and what kind of person is Shen Yanfei? All these take us into the book, wanting to know what will happen next.

Friends in the description of the character's words and deeds and the development of the development of the situation is very good, the portrayal is meticulous, the slight deficiency is the character's own appearance and appearance, it seems not to be profound enough, the style of writing is old to refined, you can see that you are well-informed, Jin Gu Liangwen's book should have read a lot, but you can't see the style of these grandmasters, it is obvious that friends have become a family of their own unique style, if you consider individual words and sentences, you can do better, Yun Ying read the first five chapters, this nonsense, I hope you forgive me for the wrong......

- Cloud Eagle

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After reading less than half of the prologue, I couldn't help but comment, I didn't think that I was so similar to the big style, it was really fortunate that I would put forward a small opinion, Ha Da second paragraph is a little sparse, if the light is changed to a light like a bean, it will be better? Of course, this is a humble opinion, the big writing far exceeds mine, should have their own ideas, I then look down, with emotion will be re-evaluated, hehe, it is rare to meet such a similar style of authors, really excited.

- Qin Yuan

After reading the prologue, although I couldn't help but want to continue looking down, I couldn't open my sleepy eyelids, so let's talk about the feeling of reading the prologue! A passionate martial arts world is presented like this, of course, the long river sinking sand is infinitely embarrassing. I can't help but suggest that it be changed to a chapter name, haha!

- Qin Yuan

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Academy Reviews:

Problem Analysis and Suggestions:

1] Perspective issues.

[The text does not have a fixed perspective, does not put the perspective on a certain character, but constantly switches between characters.

The perspective is the key to clear clues, it is recommended to put the perspective on the protagonist and tell the story from his/her point of view, and the main line will also be highlighted]

2] The protagonist problem.

[Generally speaking, the protagonist of the female frequency text is generally the heroine as the first protagonist, because most of the people who read the text are girls, the sense of substitution will be stronger, and it will be easier to enter the play, but this is not the case in the text, the protagonist is not highlighted at the beginning, it is recommended to strengthen the protagonist's role, use the protagonist to guide the development of the story, and have a backbone, then the text will not be a plate of loose sand, and people can't grasp the point]

3] Details of the problem.

[This is a very detailed and meticulous article.

Before entering the text, I first followed the text into a world of gloom, winter, snow, ice, cold, the old man in the iron shop, and the swordsman with a mysterious identity, as well as the sword that surprised the old man......

However, things are thinner than people, and this is a problem.

The description of things in the text, whether it is scenery or things, is more detailed and in-depth than the description of people, in fact, this is one of the reasons why a certain person is not highlighted in the beginning, there are too many descriptions of things, but only give people a sense of picture and ignore the story itself.

The highlights of the novel are basically on the characters, so it is recommended that the description of the object can be done until the end, strengthen the portrayal of the development of the main line of the story itself, strengthen the portrayal of the characters, whether it is the appearance or the character is an indispensable part, strengthen the portrayal of the emotional line, the emotional line is the highlight of the female frequency text, and the small plot design is very good, so I don't want to be covered by the description of the modification class]

The above is only a personal opinion, for reference only, if there is any offense, please forgive me~!

I wish Wenwen better and better~

[If you have any questions, you can find me in the youth women's frequency group or reply below]

----------------------------------------------------- [Academy] Blue Blood Green Shirt 20121006

Clear moon ice blue

Thanks to the comments of the blue blood shirts, the question of perspective and the protagonist, because the article in the setting is a double male protagonist, and the opening chapter is just two people working separately in different spaces, so they are staggered more frequently. From Chapter 7 onwards, the two meet, and structurally the Y-shape is closed, so there will be no problem of frequent orbit changes in the future. The frequent interlacing of the opening chapter actually wants to highlight a sense of tension in the atmosphere, and there is a sense of crisis everywhere, so it may be written in a more scattered culture. At the beginning, it is better to focus on the foreshadowing of the atmosphere.

As for the problem that things are greater than people, he said that the character portrayal would never dare to deal with things. Maybe it's because I've developed a habit of writing essays, but I like to describe all important scenes. Of course, it will be more interesting for people to move in a more vivid context. Generally, the scenery and objects mentioned in the text have a certain effect. For example, the pigeon and the ranger market at the beginning, etc., these elements were used to shape the character of Chu Tao, who did not show his face in the first chapter.

At present, I haven't found a solution to the perspective problem at the beginning, which has both a staggered sense of distance and tension, and can develop along the perspective of the protagonist, which seems to be very difficult. The environment is described or something, and I will try not to dominate it in the following article :)

Thanks again for the review :)

2012-10-0623:37:27

Bloody green shirts

Re: Qingyue Ice Blue on the 1st floor: You're welcome~

It is said that the benefits of scene description are much more than the disadvantages, so it is okay to keep it, but if the amount is too much at the beginning, the beginning of the story will not be obvious, because the length of the description of the modification class is occupied, so the comments only raised this question~ But you can also reserve your own opinions

The character portrayal is very distinctive, it should be said that this is the first time I have seen such a vivid and comprehensive text with a sense of picture depicted no matter what, it is worth learning!

There will always be a solution, so keep up the good work according to your preferences and ideas~

2012-10-0820:57:43

Clear moon ice blue

Re: 3rd floor blue blood shirt: greatly increased my confidence!! so I must work hard and work hard!Hehe, I will have time to repair the rhythm of this beginning in the future, and strive to string together these bits and pieces from the perspective of a certain Xie, and then connect them naturally :)

2012-10-0920:47:44