But I have a relationship, I don't want to give away the love that belongs to me, just like I only think that I give everything for a close friend, so when I have Qianfei, I can leave Bai Zijia, Emperor Luoshen, Bai Lan, and Gu Moyun.

The so-called promise, the so-called observance, is to sacrifice some humanity to fulfill the so-called selfishness. But if this selfishness is my obsession, I would rather lose everything else.

To this day, I still remember the way Gu Moyun looked at me before he died. It was so painful, and I knew that he had finally bowed his head. But his bowing never came from his realization that the world should be treated equally. He just couldn't let go of me because I was dead, and he was anxious to get my forgiveness, so he bowed his head.

But Gu Moyun, I don't need you to bow your head like this after all.

You and Giant Mark are two people, but I have always refused to admit that I feel sorry for Giant Mark and want to reverse Giant Scar's cruel thoughts. So, when I met you Gu Moyun, I looked back at myself, the past, and the giant mark, I wanted to give it a try. If someone gave you warmth, wouldn't you be so cruel?

I used to look at you as much as Master, rotten wood cannot be carved, and it is heinous. You have a bad heart, and you are in vain to disregard the way of heaven.

But when I finally walked down your path, I realized how painful it was not to be understood. Can't turn back, but being forcibly pulled back, what a desperate and helpless thing. I used to think that you didn't care about feelings, so you would rather do evil than wronged yourself and become kinder. It's like I thought that as long as you were kind, the world would still be kind to you.

But Bai Lan's encirclement and suppression of you, the world's prejudice against you, and the resentment of love and enemies against you. They all resent the sins you once committed, so even if you change, you will not be forgiven. Is it because you knew this was the case, so you simply didn't change it?

And I've always stubbornly thought that you refused to change.

What kind of being am I in your eyes, an incomprehensible madman, or a hopeless fool?

You said, among all the teachers, only I am the most affectionate. And the word love, you see it too seriously and hurt yourself, and you see it too lightly to hurt others, you would rather hurt others than hurt yourself.

I laugh at you for not understanding love, but now that I think about it, probably, you know that a lot of love will end in nothing. So, don't have a start.

So Gu Moyun, what are we? I hurt you?

Gu Moyun, do you know that my mercy for you has exceeded my compassion for the world. Your solitude, your bravery, composure, ruthlessness and viciousness, means first. Aren't these accomplishments enough for me to look up to? I am a woman, but my heart desires something to be done.

Just like Bai Lan said at the beginning, he promised me a thousand years of achievements, and I galloped for him.

When I think about the past, I can't help but admire your courage and intelligence. You sealed my memory, and my life felt like I was starting all over again, in fact, I don't regret it.

If not, I'm afraid that I will always see you as a shadow of a giant mark, and think that you are also a cold-faced person on an iceberg who is too cold in a high place.

Giant Scar was trapped in the Forest of Grievances, I knew it back then. Back then, in the war between gods and demons, as a general, he went to participate in the war, but he was nowhere to be found. And when I went, there was only the endgame left.

The world says that I can't bear to kill my demon realm creatures, but in fact, I just want to fulfill the wish of the giant mark as an admiral. He once taught me that it is my responsibility to take the common people in the world as my own responsibility, and as a general, I would rather die than be defeated!

I sealed the Eight Desolation Gods just to prove that I had lived up to his expectations.

When I woke up again, I was rumored to be the savior, and even I began to laugh at the world, laughing at Bai Lan, and laughing at the Demon Emperor of Qiyu. But I'm more curious, who deified me like this?

On the Daxiong Treasure Palace, the play played by Emperor Yanqiu and you is the most high-sounding I have ever seen. And I, I want to live, so, I agreed to your request. I also want to see what you can do to win.

In the world, when I first saw you, I was ecstatic, you are a snake demon, and there must be more than the world in the world, but also other places. I've been thinking about it for seventeen years, is there really a ghost or god in the world? And your appearance is the best answer.

I am willing to go with you because I think that the demon world may be warmer than the human world, or that everything can be done again.

In Lin'an, everything is like a nightmare, ignorant people, bullying the small with the big, and the weak with the strong. I remember that scholar, who had a world of mind and a righteous spirit. But he didn't die well.

I always thought of him in the past years, and similar to him, there was a troubled time. A man who values his responsibilities more than his life will work all his life, but he will not die well.

The ending of the troubled times reminds me of the scholars in Lin'an, and the times when I was oppressed, the world is unfair, and it has always been like this since the world.

And the Demon Realm, even more.

Here, it became another nightmare for me, and I finally realized that this was a new game set for me by God. The world is still cruel, the rules are still ruthless, and I just changed the venue of the game from the human world to the demon world. Upgraded your gaming companions from mortals to gods and demons.

In my eyes, Gu Moyun is like an unspoken rule, and Yanqiu God Emperor is like a law. One is extrajudicial affairs, and the other is extrajudicial affairs.

The so-called good and evil have long been determined by the world. God is righteousness, and demons are evil.

Emperor Yanqiu said, what else does this need to be explained?

And you, Gu Moyun, are the laughing stock of the God Realm, you are full of evil spirits and have improper mental skills. The only thing you have done well is to maintain the Heavenly Strip and the dignity of the Divine Realm very well, but what does this mean? You are still a demon.

If we weren't enemies, I think I'd be happy to know you, like a sharp sword, breathtakingly sharp. And I have always liked the strong, and only the strong have the right to speak.

Good and evil are the words of the strong.

When the fragrance of flowers hits, the mountains are full of gentleness, and the air is filled with a sweet smell, with the smell of earth renovation, the spring rain sweeps in. I can always think of someone - a nightmare.

The nightmare was like a mirror that easily told me about my faults and crimes. It's not that I can't take her, but I prefer to be alert to myself like this.

Nightmare said that she has lived in my heart for thousands of years, and she feels sorry for my obsession, and she also thinks it is ridiculous. She said that she wanted to stay with me to prove that my obsession was the most ridiculous and the saddest lie in the world.

The moment she said this, I was also interested, but I was afraid that what she said was true, and all this was just a flash in the pan.

Nightmares haunt me all day long, trying her best to sow discord, she thinks that three or two sentences can ruin a relationship, but she doesn't know, she will only make herself more confused if she continues like this. The relationship between two people is slowly running-in, constantly contradictory, and then running-in.

She thought that feelings were like a piece of paper, as long as they were torn apart, they could be ruined. But how much effort does it take to tear it up? In a word, it can't be.

I've thought about controlling the nightmare and using this power for myself. From the beginning, I was very disgusted that such arrogant people were presumptuous in front of me. If she hadn't occupied Luo Jiushuang's body, how would I have endured it everywhere?

I thought the nightmare was simply unsophisticated, but every word she said was like the truth, piercing my stubbornness and making it impossible for me to hold on.

Nightmare has been following me, and although she is a little annoying, she is always telling the truth. And she is the first person to see me from the beginning to the end of my life, and she can see it most clearly. Killing her was like killing another me. So, I've been reluctant to kill her.

When the Nightmare Ice Lantern was sent to me by Gu Moyun, I hesitated, and nightmares had become my habit for some time. I didn't dare tell Qianfei, I didn't dare tell anyone, and I didn't dare tell Nightmare. I'm not afraid that she will laugh at me and be easily emotional to her, I am just afraid that my presumptuous confession will ruin all the layout.

I hated hiding my feelings the most, but I didn't want to end up that I was that person. Some people and things I used to resent were the main ones in the end. And I laughed and called it, as it should be.

I always say that nightmares don't understand love, but she is the one who sees love the word the most clearly. In her eyes, feelings are just a wind and moon, which can be replaced and forgotten, and nothing will be immortal. The so-called eternity is nothing more than forcing yourself to draw the ground as a prison and make a cocoon to bind yourself.

I silently agreed with her point of view, but I didn't dare to speak out.

When Qianfei rushed to me with red eyes, she asked me categorically, Shui Duyan, are we never possible?

At that moment, I saw myself, and I also asked Bai Zijia categorically, are we never possible?

I've been fighting for so long that I'm exhausted, so finally, I don't have the previous appreciation for Qianfei, and those good things are being worn out little by little.

I said to Emperor Luo Shen that the reason why I have been conniving with Qianfei is that I don't want to break the balance in Qianfei's heart. But in fact, I don't want to make Qianfei's heart even colder. How similar is Qianfei, who has nothing, to me who once was?

I've been wondering, if I had someone who went to the trouble for me back then, would I not be the sick person I am now?

I thought I was positive enough, but I didn't think that I would be able to fall to such a state one day. Pessimistic to the extreme, living like a joke in the world. He became the most pitiful person in my eyes. And when I took this step, I didn't need pity at all, or even understanding, I felt redundant.

It was as if I was the only one left in the world, and I felt so relieved. It seems that people in the world should be alone, and there is no such thing as two companions. This is very different from me when I was younger. So, I know, I'm old.

Alone, Bai Zijia is like this.

The palace with high walls is lonely and lonely, but that's it.

I sealed my memories, but they were all restored the moment I died. I think of Bai Zijia's confession to me, and she misses me deeply.

I realized that all her subsequent actions were so reasonable. It's not that she's unreasonable, but she's endured it to the limit.

I thought she was unwilling and cocooned herself, but I didn't want her to be affectionate and difficult to extricate herself.

Bai Zijia, in our lives, we love and kill each other, in the end, you are unwilling and unbearable to me, and I am reluctant to give up on you, but after all, I still let go.

Feelings are most afraid of procrastination, we have delayed for too long, like a medicine that slowly spreads, burning you and me, the love is not there, only resentment.

But the reason why I got involved with you later was half because I was reluctant, and half because I wanted to heal the wounds in your heart. But in your eyes, that's me cheeky and have extravagant expectations for you. Even if I knew you thought so, I wouldn't explain it.

I've learned to be silent, to do the same thing you used to do to you. When I saw the coldness in your eyes, heard the sneer on the corner of your mouth, and felt the bottomless indifference in your heart. I also smiled, with sarcasm and pity, Bai Zijia, you finally felt the pain you inflicted on me back then?

Ridiculous, right? We hate each other and love each other.

You hate me for being abusive, and you hate me for changing my mind too quickly. And I, I resent you for not saying anything, and resented you for hiding all your love in the bottom of your heart. Hate you for trampling friendship under love, hate your collectivism, hate you for never being on my side.

Therefore, when I deeply knew that you were no different from ordinary people, I decisively abandoned you. Even if I still have you in my heart, even if I can't bear you, even if I leave you, I will still miss you very much. But I can ruthlessly leave you and start a new relationship.

Am I ruthless? If this is ruthlessness, then the world is ruthless.

What you want is that we owe each other, and it will never be possible. Tortured, but undying to death.

That's your gentleness and domineering, but that's what I taboo the most.

Can you ignore everyone in the blink of an eye?

I said, yes. The love I want is so selfish.